Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 13, 2023

“Just as soon as we can find yet another doofus who’s willing to work for no pay.”

Yeah, we need some crazy-eyed enthusiasm in the program.

Oh. Me. Mow. Luke JOINING Milford’s wrestling program. I never expected the idea of him and Gil forced to JOIN FORCES. Will he go off the rails or redeem himself? And who will replace him as Gil’s wide eyed comically over the top nemesis? Enquiring me’s want to know. The strip just won’t be the same without some weirdo treating high school sports like he’s battling superman.

The ultimate takedown.

P4 “Yeah…but it’s not going to be you, Luke.”

Anyone who would hire a jackwagon with his baggage deserves all the misery they get.

P4 (Alternate) Luke: “Hey everybody, we’re all gonna get laid!” (Beth thought bubble) “YAS! Gil…OH, YAS!”

Is it my imagination, or is Milford constantly hiring new coaches? That should be a red flag to any job applicant that the work conditions might be sub-optimal.

Ok. So Gil is an idiot. Got it.

P4- aannndddd I need a QB1 to lead the mighty Jaybirds, errr Mudlarks. HRAACCKKK!

Gil: A part of the job description is to welcome failure. But shouldn’t be a problem for you as you’ve gotten so familiar with it over the last year

P1: Luke is sure living up to the “BH” part of his “BHHL” initials

Better than hiring Jim Jordan.

No effin’ way! Is Luke that desperate for a job that he is able to overcome 20 some odd years of misplaced anger and jealousy that he would take a second tier job as a wrestling coach under the supervision of his archrival? Strains credulity. Besides, I thought his wife was a surgeon. He should be spending his afternoons at MCC with Mimi, Ericka and Amelia.

Oh no, Gil is taking personnel advice from Jaybird? A long dead kid reincarnated as a peacock? Gil is losing it.

Where’d Beth go? She must be in the back waiting for Gil to get separated so she can make her annual move.

“The problem, Luke, is that Dr. Pearl will only authorize you get paid half of what Tays is getting which is half of what Kaz used to make. It’s probably not even enough to cover the cost of how many razors you go through.” And speaking of going through, you should be going through Mopped Up Thorp right about now.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/2023/07/13/fighting-over-beth/

" . . . and he’s going to need an assistant to scrub the mats and do the laundry. And pretty much any menial, dirty job I can think of."

I’m guessing that Gil didn’t know how Luke tried to busy-body himself into coach Kim’s basketball coaching strategy last winter.

“… but the new coach can’t walk around in those idiotic wrestling one-sies…. Only team members are allowed to wear that s***…”

Milford needs a new AD !!!!!! Gil coaches football, basketball, baseball, golf and who knows what else. Cami coaches basketball and softball. But, Milford has a dedicated coach for a lower-tier sport like wrestling ??!!! Yet another example of “plot twist” and “strains credulity” belonging in the same sentence .

P2.5 “No hard feelings, Gil. Hey, pull my finger, will you?”

Tomorrow I want to see:

P1 – Luke: “Hmm, let me think about it.”

P2 – Rips off his suit and he’s wearing his wrestling singlet.

P3 – “I’m in!”

Great!!! I will have to get my singlet from the cleaners.

Dagnab it Gil! I didn’t think you’d use that information for recruiting a nutjob who probably strangles peacocks if they hraaaak too early in the morning!

Hrak (contractual obligation)

A former high school coach walks into a bar…..

I know Gil welcomes failure but, seriously?

Meanwhile, there sits former coach Kaz thinking “Thanks a lot OLD friend for not thinking to ask ME!”

“We’re offering the job to Herk the Mauler, but if he says no, you’re in. How do look in a cape and a mask? Yeah, yeah, it’s a different kind of wrestling. I think we’ll call you TheHairy Hero!”

Let’s get back to Beth pouring some old fashioneds since there is no golf.