Herman by Jim Unger for March 11, 2023

If they went through that much work, you may want to consider letting them keep it.

It was probably my brother.

Kia

Somebody ate their Wheaties this morning.

He found the weakest link.

Maybe it was a beaver on steroids?

Whoever did it, it must have been more a Tarzan than a…Chain

It was King Kong.

I would venture to say they needed it more than you.

It was presented as a challenge, and somebody took it up. You can catch the thief, as he probably posted it on FaceBook.

The bike locks commonly seen in NYC are almost that big.

Bike probably just escaped that chain on its own.

Hulk Smash and Grab!!

Must be a rough neighborhood….

He’s probably too big to ride it, unless he gets the banana seat

On top of which they’ve broken the chain of evidence.

Those plastic halloween chains you get at the dollar store are pretty easy to break, or cut with a paring knife.

King Kong needed a bike?

His bicycle was so big, he called it his Linkin.

I’d say, let them have it.

Whoever broke that chain, you do not want to catch in the act.

The bike lock designers have a hard time keeping up with the ingenuity of the crooks who overcome them. The good news is that most bike thefts happen to unlocked ones which are too tempting to pass up, and even a relatively flimsy lock will serve the purpose of dissuading the casual thief who just wants to hop on your bike and ride it away…. until he has no further use for it.

Sorry sir, we don’t investigate bicycle thefts, ESPECIALLY yours……

Of course, using a paper mache chain…

“Sir, rather than confronting him, I’ll just give you the money to get another bike and I will go home alive at the end of the day.”

When I had an apartment in Burbank, CA, I bought a chain like that to anchor my bike against a concrete pillar. I weaved the chain through the wheels and frame and locked it with a big ol’ hardened padlock. Bad guys stole other residents’ bikes, but not mine.

Pee-Wee! You’ve gotten so old!!! C’mon, this is the most appropriate comment for “Herman” ever, if you think about it!

Have you checked at The Alamo?

Was the bicycle aboard a Navy vessel?