Moderately Confused by Jeff Stahler for January 24, 2025

They’ll change the name so you won’t need to register it.

Still made. About $79 at Walmart. About $95 after tariffs.

A sharp veggie knife is cheaper.

Fastest gun in the salad bar!

Salad tongs.

The secret service won’t let it in the oval office.

This just in: “A salad shooter opened up and took down 6 heads of cabbage in the school cafeteria today.”

It wouldn’t surprise me if there wasn’t a law against it in California.

“Why, is our neighbor, the gardener, still trying to get rid of all that extra zucchini he grew?”

“A well regulated Kitchen, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear salad shooters, shall not be infringed.”

Don’t know if you can take one into the Capital or not, some were upset about something the other day, but you’ll probably get a Reprieve.

You’re not allowed in the farmer’s market with one.

My mother, many years ago, had what I guess was the manual version of a salad shooter. You turned it with a handle, and it would grate cheese, or cabbage for slaw, or other things – depending on what cutting head you attached.

I never got my license for one.

I’m in Arizona and I do not see as many people Open Carry now as when I first moved here, now they probably Conceal Carry since they can as AZ is a Constitutional Carry state but you must be 21 and over to conceal a firearm.

I thought those were gone with the pet rocks.