Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for October 27, 2019

If fortune tellers really knew their stuff they’d all be winning the lottery

Wonder if Madame Tenuta is any relation to Judy Tenuta. (Anybody remember Judy Tenuta?)

It’s never made sense to me that psychics would spend any money on advertising. They can divine all answers on all matters, except those regarding any identifying information on who might be interested? And these psychics spend the majority of their time “consulting” their customers by asking them personal questions?

“I sense someone important to you in your family who has an initial of “M” for one of their names. Do you have a father or siblings who has an initial of M? It could also be their first name, or one of their middle names. How about anybody you know well, like a family member, who has any initial of M in their name?" Etc., etc., etc. Like spirits wander around in the afterlife, while wearing spectral monogrammed pajamas. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UndHjweWWoA

If the husband had said “crap” instead of “nonsense,” would there have been a refund?

A good psychic reads the gullibility and gives the logical answer.

Wiley, love the cat

Sealed envelope with a fortune? Reminds me of Carnac the Magnificent

Yet hubby will plop down a thousand bucks for a computer forever on the blink. Tis the cat in the family with the only sense.

Got to be so true ..

Did Judy give up the accordion?

Clever letter, but never let her…..read you again!

Madame Tenuta doesn’t look like a Medium, she’s more of an Extra-Large!

In the waiting room of a local car repair shop, a customer unloaded her troubles on me by saying that she had just been duped by a dishonest psychic. I thought the word “dishonest” was redundant.

not really. They are not allowed to do that…

They wouldn’t ask for your credit card number; they’d already know it!

My wife and I were having an argument. I really can’t recall the details, but the main issue for me was that I felt that she was making assumptions about my motives for doing something.

So I yelled at her, “You can’t read my mind. What am I thinking about right now?”

Then she flipped me the bird.

Then I laughed and said, “Oh my God! You can read my mind.” And the argument was over.

Now that quote has become a catch phrase between us to remind us not to assume what the other person is thinking or the motive behind why they did something.

phone call “Hello, you have reached the psychic help line. Do not leave a message, we know who you are.” Hm-m, caller ID still works.

Wow, I didn’t know that Judy changed careers.

An October Pew study found that over half of Americans actually believe in one or more: astrology, tarot cards, magic crystals, fortune tellers, god.

So thin is the line between ‘seeing’ the future and ‘predicting’ the future. Not worth $200.00 unless it is the Super Bowl.

Well, on to “Calvin and Hobbes.”

I can tell your future. Just ask.

Madame Tenuta? Is her first name Judy?

His comment reflects mine every time my wife goes grocery shopping.

WOW! She is good!

Trump, of course, is his own White House astrologer (because he is SO much more smarter and biglier well-informed than the others are), tarot card reader (ditto), psychic, entrails reader, palm reader (not that his hands have ROOM for very many lines……), and of course, he is his own volcano, and is hoping somebody will throw a virgin into it…….

a small price/fee for you/he to pay

Judy’s gone from stand-up with her concertina, leaving the life of a petite flower to become a fortune teller??

It could happen!

Some predictions are easier to get right than others.

Wow.

How did the fortune Teller know that he’d say “Nonsense” instead of “Bullshit”?

Donald Trump went to a mind reader; she gave him his money back.

This is an excellent portrayal of the opening step in the “fortune teller” con game – getting the mark to believe their powers.

Nearly every husband will respond with those exact words (or close enough for belief) if presented with a $200 bill for “fortune telling”.

Except Ronald Reagan – he accepted his wife’s fortune tellers and astrologists as competent advisers. But then again .. . .