Pickles by Brian Crane for November 01, 2019

granddad joke

Come to think of it, it’s kinda amazing how you never hear of a belly button coming undone.

You’d think there would be an occasional quack who ties a bad knot…

Be it such . . . I’d much rather have an inny than an outie !

I didn’t know that Nelson was in kindergarten; I thought he was older. The next riddle is “Why is my belly button lint always blue no matter what color shirt I wear?”

Not telling kids stories like this cuts down on paranoid kids.

I believed that as a kid.

When we are kids, parents and grandparents tell us lots of stories like this, I can think of a few!

Untie? I thought it was unfasten…

Earl is the new “Tree that knows stuff” from Over The Hedge ;-)

Do you know why lint collects in the bellybutton? It’s a navel reserve.

I was told my butt would fall off.

The moral of the story is never show your Fuzzy Navel to your bar buddy…..

A young man we know was told his belly button was a lint gland. Years later, in high school biology class, the teacher was discussing glands – adrenal, pituitary, thyroid. . . and poor Christopher piped up to remind the teacher he’s forgotten the lint gland. As soon as the words were out of his mouth the poor kid knew he’d stepped in it – royally.

two words… umbilical hernia

W-A-A-A-A-Y too early in the morning for this. . .why aren’t you gorging on your Halloween candy, Nelson, like every other kid this morning? (When did the apostrophe disappear from Halloween?)

The lint is actually useful. You collect it each day and save it in a plastic baggie. Take it with you when you go camping and use it as tinder to start your campfire. I learned that back in my scouting days. (I was in the same Junior Woodchucks patrol as Huey, Dewey, and Louie.)

I guess my childhood was lacking-Inever had anything like that told to me-(Really glad)

Much easier and quicker to retrieve it from the dryer screen.

A disinformation contest between Lucy Van Pelt, Calvin’s Dad and Earl could be awesome.

You will be able to identify Adam and Eve in Heaven because they don’t have belly buttons.

I was always told that if you untied your belly button your butt would fall off. It is fragile, it already has a huge crack in it.

Is Earl really Calvin’s father grown up to be a grandfather?

The kid’s going to be a TOTAL mental case by the time Earl’s through with him !!!! lol

Earl and Calvin’s dad must be related somehow.

Saved in the nick of time!!!

Good thing he has Earl to guide him through such hazards.

If you push it your legs come off

Everything I ever needed to know, I learned from my Grandfather. Not.

If you have link in your navel, your umbilicus scar, then you aren’t being clean enough.

Mine is a Gordian Knot.

Never UNBUTTON your belly button!

Earl, The Man, The Myth, The Legend.