Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for April 23, 2021

I agree with Puck, it really kinda is!

Oh man, Tabitha. I feel that. If someone actually calls me, I assume it’s urgent and terrible. (Spam calls don’t count; I don’t pick up numbers I don’t know. Real people TEXT!)

No, no, Tabitha, if it had been a CRISIS (with all caps), the Emergency Broadcatsing Network would have been activated. This is only a Crisis.

(No, I didn’t misspell that. Have you ever heard an annoyed meezer singing?)

Tabitha says the people need to text, but I notice she’s not texting.

Kebble, aka Walmart’s store brand Special Kitty dry food.

Give it up, go get some Kibble!

Meat Loaf: I Would Do Anything (Per Robin’s Request)

And I would eat anything for lunch

I would have tuna or chicken or beef!

And I would eat anything for lunch

I would never eat Kebble and that’s a fact!

Oh, I’ll never forget the gray stuff that looks like stones

Oh no, no way!

Oh I would eat anything for lunch

But I won’t eat that!

No I won’t eat that!

…….

Some days it’s ham or bacon

Some days it’s tuna fish

Some days it’s chicken with cheese

And there are the treats that are such temptations!

Some nights we’re running around

Some nights we’re fast asleep

Some nights we’re all curled up

Or we might be all stretched out!

…….

I would eat anything for lunch,

But I won’t do that!

No, no, no, that I won’t do!

(Continued)

And so the crisis continues and the humiliation of the Man spreads…

Elvis: Can you believe this stuff? It just can’t be true,

Is this something Tabitha and Figs would do?

Would Tommy and Sophie eat this too?

…….

Puck: They won’t do that

They won’t do that!

…….

Goldie: Will you cater to every craving I got?

Will the caterer bring Nine Lives and Meow Mix to hit the spot?

Can we have a feast that is fancy as well?

…….

Puck: They can do that

I’m sure they can do that!

…….

Lupin: I know the territory, I’ve been around

I’ll shred the TP, yes every roll that can be found

The Man’s shoes, cry of Doom will we sound!

…….

Elvis: I might do that!

I just might do that!

All: Anything for lunch

But we won’t do that!

Pucky in Panel 2. Hahaha. The “i know. I feel ya, sister.” sympathetic pose.

OT I’m in an extended care facility for 2 or 3 more weeks so my routine is thrown off. But Elvis’s look of righteous indignation (but so dignified) is definitely a crisis.

Kind of a crisis? Puck, this is a crisis. A large crisis. In fact, if you got a moment, it’s a twelve-storey crisis with a magnificent entrance hall, carpeting throughout, 24-hour portage, and an enormous sign on the roof, saying ‘This Is a Large Crisis’.

It ain’t no mere quibble about the Kebble.

And still the upstairs neighbor is not named.

A landline?! WTF is this, 1970?! Does it have buttons? Did you get a party line?

Fight for our food-dom. The Kebbles will conquer us and treat us cats like slaves. To GLORY!

I love the gentle empathy Puck shows the woman with his paw in panel two.

Nothing is going to get Elvis out of his funk unless a bag of Kibble suddenly appears. I notice the Man is not present in the strip for the past 2 days. Well I am certain that in the feline circle he is now “Man/persona non grata” in the house so he might be keeping a low profile by staying outdoors or hiding in the basement to avoid the felines.

Oh good grief….someone go to the store and get real cat food before the entire contents of the apartment are reduced to claw shredded ribbons and all the shoes are full of anxiety induced over grooming hairballs!

Meanwhile in other strips, there is a kibble crisis on Arlo and Janis and over at CleoandCompany.net Indiana Bones has embarked (hee hee) on a quest for The Lost Ark of the Kibble.

A Sir Fig sighting!! Today is going to be a GREAT day!

I love Figaro

Maybe she can borrow enough Kibble to tide the family over until somebody fixes their shopping error.

Break out the emergency ham rations and tuna water.

Puck: “I mean we’re down here looking at dishes full of what appears to be used charcoal briquettes.”

Last panel – Elvis decides which shoes he’s going to hork in first.

The Woman can barely say … “Kebble.” Oh, the shame.

Tabitha and Sir Figaro Newton!! Huzzah! Huzzah!!

A Man that we know just came from the Belmont Fruit stand

He smiled because he thought we’d understand

Then he held up the Kebble food bag ha-ha

He said it was the best in all the land

And we said:

No no no no, we can’t take it no more

What happened to the food we adore?

No, thank you, please,

We are very displeased

With its rock-hard texture we abhor

A Woman we know called our friends from upstairs

She cringed because her friend couldn’t understand

She knew Kebble is the worst brand in all the land

Neighbor said:

No no no no, take it back to the store

Fig feels Puck’s funk thru the floor

No, thank you, please,

It sounds like a disease

So please don’t call about it here anymore (no más)

Oh, go go go, please rush back to the store

We’ll wait right here, starving, by the door

Hurry up, please

So this crisis will ease

And then we can be happy evermore

(David P. Jr. Jackson / Hoyt Wayne Axton – The No No Song/Ringo Starr)

So when everyone gets land line phones in their houses people stop using the telegraph. Then everyone gets cell phones and people stop using land lines. And now people stop using phone calls and…. transmit typed out (usually abbreviated) messages. Kinda took a huge step backwards there.

She’s gotta do something about it…

O.T-Just a question… Whats your favorite story line to date? Mine is 1) Finding Bea. 2) Goldie finding a home. 3) Elvis gets out and Tommy brings him back.

>Sigh!<

I wonder if the wild animals would eat the Kebble or if it is even too bad for them?

Wait do both Tabitha and Sir Figaro have kebble also? If they do, then that would be a CRISIS.

Best wishes for a complete recovery!

About 10 years ago, we were feeding a stray on our back porch, trying to get her kittens to be adopted (didn’t work). Once, I was so broke that I bought the cheapest dry cat food I could find.

The stray wouldn’t eat it. The jays wouldn’t eat it. The RACCOONS wouldn’t eat it.

The blessed ANTS wouldn’t take it.

How does Walmart sell that crap?

I hate throwing away food – but that couldn’t really be called food, could it?

Maybe KEBBLE can be composted?

I bet sales of Red Ridge cat and dog food are going to skyrocket after this set of strips. I’m sure most of you get the code name.

For Swan Eaters’ readers, I wanted to share a link to another GC comic that I think would bring back some memories and give you a chuckle: https://www.gocomics.com/speedbump/2021/04/23?ct=v&cti=703083

OT: Poor Roscoe…

The Woman should put it in a FB give away group. Or maybe it can be used to fill potholes.

OT: My Camera

The “E” is for extra energy.

It’s not a crisis. It’s just the end of the world as they know it.

I love how Pucky is supporting the woman with a paw on the arm.

If you ask Elbiff it is a crisis.

No cat would eat that crud.