Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for January 28, 2022

No, throw in the Medicare plan calls for those of us older.

We are calling you to inform you that your Social Security Benefits have been compromise …

Your call is very important to us. Please wait and you will be helped in time for your own funeral.

Good day to you, my friend. I’m a Nigerian Prince……..

The other 10% is telling you, that you may have won a cruise.

How true, how true!

Direct TV spam calls are making up a lot of my human interaction lately.

I get a robot calling itself Amazon and checking to see if it was indeed me who ordered an X-Box and several thousand dollars worth of games.

Getting an email saying I was charged $5000 for a new TV. If this is in error call this number.

Looks like she want to distract yer attention from the crystal ball.

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.

Don’t forget email spam about “Tactical Air Drones”!

The latest is “Your internet and social media accounts with _ _ _ _ (which you don’t have) have been compromised/hacked/stolen. We will disconnect you account (which you don’t have) and your land-line (which you don’t have) unless you contact us within 24 hours” – but you’ll get the same messages left on your phone for at least 6 or 7 days after that.

Plus, on the message they will tell you to press “1” now to talk to them or to call a number for their business office but the prefix for the number is only used for cell phones in your area.

One of the reasons I am glad I do not live in the US right now.

I’m getting calls saying they can help me with my student debt. I don’t HAVE any student debt, I never even went to collage.

Medicare ads are 24/7/365

No wonder it’s so expensive! We’re paying for their annoying ads!!!

Sickening!

We will pay you cash for your house!

in feb of last year BC had a bit about those calls. now when one comes through I laugh at them and say "this scam is so well documented you idiots are literally in the funny pages.

H-m-m-m-m I’ll have to check to see if our warranties still apply. Our vehicles are from ’99, ’03, ’07. Nope. No warranty. No problem.

Hmm I’m getting a glimpse of people on a screen in Brady Bunch fashion…..

All you gotta do is hang up. Works for me. Of course, then I block the number. I have quite a collection of blocked numbers. I wonder if there is a way to block all numbers except the ones in your contacts list. That would be nice. Everything else can go to voicemail.

I’m not looking forward to a quantum computer cold-calling me in all my alternate realities. :)

Because here in 2020 and beyond, we are not allowed to interact with each other.

I probably do get a high percentage of calls from auto warranty people. That wouldn’t be so bad if they actually knew I didn’t have a BMW. Or, ever had a Toyota. Or, knew I already had an auto warranty for the Leaf.

Throw in the covid vaccine, that will kill a little percentage of those who take it within 3 weeks.

And for the other 10%, go to the political cartoons comment sections. That’ll scare you even more!

It’s bad enuff getting calls about it, now we have to read about it.

No, don’t forget “We’d like to make an offer on your house located at…”

Actually the majority of it consists of: "Your call is important, please hold… Your call us important, please hold … Your call is important, please hold… "

OMGoodness…these are the reason I screen all calls on my cell phone. FCC obviously doesn’t care about we the people, allowing telemarketers to change their call number, able to call repeatedly using different call numbers, while used numbers have been placed on “no-call list” Is the no-call list now overwhelmed? Thanks FCC Director is a joke.

Always good to know you can get a warranty for a car you haven’t owned for several years.

While I was reading this, I got one of those calls. As I’m writing this, my wife is dealing with one of those calls.

Oh! I forgot one: letters & phone call messages that we’re behind on our vehicle payments & our CAR will be repossessed in 24 hours, unless we call this number & make up the back payments, plus interest, on our credit card!!! We haven’t owned a CAR in over 35 years & our VANS have all been “cash & carry”!!!

Lately, it has been calls from the supposed motor vehicle department. With their thick German accent, I won’t tell them that it is referred to as the department of motor vehicles.

what is it with different comics lately making a reference to car warranties?

Yeah, the crap calls are endless. I don’t answer my phone unless it comes up known. I’ll listen to the voicemail later.

Fun fact, if you buy an Audi, the people wanting to see you a warranty [they know!] will quit calling. When you trade in the Audi, the calls resume.

I was going to say the other 10% are about your student loans.

Why are they contacting me about a warranty on public transport?

This is the reason we need Tomahawk missiles that can automatically home in on call centers and the mainframe centers that support them.

Sadly, they won’t talk to me about my 1972 Buick Skylark.