Pickles by Brian Crane for May 24, 2022

Now you can enjoy the beautiful inside.

that geode must’ve cost Earl a hard penny

Most geodes are a lot tougher than that.

Now Nelson has lots of little crystals.

Easy come, easy go

Stick it back together with super glue and the handyman’s secret weapon: Duck Tape.

Ask again in 10 million years

Even the pieces are fascinating.

Only if I have rocks in my head

Why not just hand him a hand grenade? Same result.

They are kind of rare!

… or Nelson could now give a (piece of a) geode to each of his friends (and still save a piece for himself).

It appears that the geode Earl gave Nelson was (only) half of a (the original) geode – that was cut in two. [You can also get a whole geode that you would have to break (or have cut) open to see the crystals inside.]

Sure, but you’ll have to wait ten million years.

Ten million years to form, ten seconds to break!

That’s what grandparents are for – getting things their parents won’t give them. (Or, in this case, a precious stone replacement)

No problem lad. Wait here while another forms.

No, but you can glue it back together, good as new!

Uh oooh! Seems he’s a chip off the ole stone…

Be a loooong wait, kid!

Thats why everything given to kids today are plastic.

10 million years……. and 1 second to destroy

“Can I get you another one? No. Put that one back together, then we’ll talk, Prince Clumsy.”

Sure, in ten million years!

I’m pretty sure a geode is created by the crystallization of extremely hot rock, such as a chunk of magma thrown out of a volcano. If it then cools slowly, crystals can form. However, NOT millions of years slowly.

Now he has a bunch of little crystals. I had a rack in the back garden area that showed crystals on the surface. My grandkids liked it so they got a hammer and chipped away at it until half the boulder was gone. I didn’t care and they had fun collecting the crystals.

Yes I will get you another one in ten million years.

One time I gave my wife a geode that was ten million and one years old. Apologies to Jason.

It could be worse. I could have been the lamp from “A Christmas Story”.

Just like my lab instructors when I was running the biology teaching collection. “The students broke that one — can we have another?…”