Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for October 16, 2022

Yeah, I don’t think that’s quite the problem here…

For you, Spring will take care of it.

What’s happening to you is more like molting.

It’ll all grow back – fresh and green.

a tWIG…..

Walking talking tree? This is retreeculous!

Well, first of all we has to get to the root of the problem…

Ah the coun-tree-side is always so pleasant.

What do trees do on halloween?

They go tree-ck or tree-ting.

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How do you count the number of trees in a forest?You begin with one, two, tree… Hee hee hee!

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What is tree’s favourite movie?

Forest Stump

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If a tree falls in the forest and there’s nobody around, then does it make a treemendous sound?Absolutree.

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Trees may grows all big strong and tall, but they always bows down to the almightree.

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The trees has a proprietree right to all forest property. It’s mandatree to respect their rights.

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Deforestation is no tree-vial matter. It not something to be tree-felled with.

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It such a beau-tree-ful day today. Enjoy your sunday, friends.

Okay okay. No more pun-di-tree. Me will leaves now. Bye byes!

Tell it to go to Fangorn forest and find someone called Treebeard. He might have a something for you to drink. I’ve read of a couple of Hobbits who did and they grew into rather large Hobbits. After all, Treebeard is a tree shepherd.

So far no one has mentioned the Scottish Play. A friend of mine at school wrote a parody of MacBeth in which one of the soldiers dressed as trees got Dutch Elm Disease and another was used as a battering ram when they reached Glamorgan Castle.

The real MacBeth was High King of Scotland from 1040 to 1057 and was a very popular king. He went on a pilgrimage to Rome in 1050 and “scattered coins to the poor like seed” as part of his pilgrimage.

He ent got nothin’

Trees don’t walk, or talk.

Take two leafs and call me in the morning.

A wreath? A BIG wreath?

Yours grows back full every Spring. Mine never does!

Just leaf, it alone it will return

Sorry Ent. It’s moot. Trees lose their leaves and that’s all there is to fall.

So wait… is the tree pining to solve this problem?

Sorry.

Acceptance… and wear a hat in the sun or snow.

Is there releaf for that condition?

Sorry fella…as you branch out, leaves tend to fall quicker….and end up root-less…

Essence of Spring.

Come back in the spring. All of the ingredients that I need have gone into hibernation for the winter and you should, too.

Do you have a spell to help me grow a beard?

It’s not “male pattern”, it’s a result of coloring your leaves.

Funny!

Day of the Triffids!

High nitrate fertilizer, but it will take 3 or 4 months to work, depending on that rascally groundhog.

Like a willow tree looking for viagra.

Obviously, he’s got to get to the root of the problem.