Frank and Ernest by Thaves for May 13, 2024

The dryer eats the socks.

I KNEW they had something to do with it!!!

Now to find out who “they” are!

See “Close to Home”.

Hint: All the missing socks are in the same place as the vanished Tupperware lids.

It’s the Soxth Dimension.

Department of Firearms versus Department of Arms on Fire.

As it is the boMs, would there be any socks around?

Geesh, everyone knows they go through a dimensional rift in the dryer ….

We had cat that would sit on the dresser in the bedroom. He was a bureaucat.

You must be right, mourdac, I lose them somewhere between dryer and my sock drawer and they appear out of nowhere a week later.

The Bureau of Missing Socks is also the Dresser of Mismatched Feet.

They’re gonna need a bigger Bureau.

How does the Bureau find the sneaky little bas…..

Find one missing person, and you automatically find two missing socks…!

That’s quite the motley “crew”.

Logical fallacy! “Missing” socks are NEVER in the bureau.

My hypothesis, which I call the Law of Sock Conservation, is that there are a fixed number of socks in the Universe, and whenever I find only one sock of a pair in my dryer it’s either because its mate has teleported into YOUR dryer or one of yours has teleported into MINE. Supporting this hypothesis is the companion Phenomenon of Sock-Valence Magnetism, which states that socks are attracted only to dryers that already contain other socks of the same size.

I’m seeking funding to investigate these hypotheses more rigorously.

Remember, missing socks return as tupperware lids that fit Nothing.

They teleport to the same planet that all the missing biros [ballpoint pens] migrate to.

I need one of those!

So if the missing socks are on the sock bureau… How many bodies are in the missing person bureau? Dial 999 (911) now, can’t stand sock robbers!

Suppose your sock drawer contains ten pairs of black socks and ten pairs of dark blue socks. How many socks do you have pull out (without looking) to be sure of getting a matching pair?

why aren’t their any bodies sticking out of the bureau of missing persons