Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 10, 2024

it’s mortifying to be told that your fly is open. It’s more mortifying to be told you’re not wearing pants. Choose wisely.

Shoo fly, don’t bother me…

Since an open fly is wider than a closed one, we can call it wi-fly for short, right?

I still remember the female classmate in 5th grade telling me (in class) that I had a letter in my mail box.. What mailbox? After some gesturing on her part, I finally understood that my fly was open, exposing my “tighty-whitey” underwear, Later, I realized she was probably saying that i had a letter in my male box. She was a lot of fun!

We’re getting into recurring dream territory here. Add in not being able to find your schedule or classroom at a new school and a final project due for a class you forgot to attend until just after the deadline to drop the class had passed.

Get the swatter.

Whut is that thang?

You don’t have to wear slacks to be a ‘Fly Girl’.

Well, put on some pants. That should deal with it.

I have a friend whose wife says good things happen when you’re not wearing pants.

Better go back to today’s “Ziggy.” They have a much looser dress code there.

You’re the fly on the wall.

In my most embarrassing moment ever, I was a teenager talking with a girl I REALLY liked when a fly kept landing on my arm. I meant to say, as I swatted at it, “get off my arm” but instead shouted “get off my fly!”

SSP (Strategic Signature Placement).

I love your name placement. Ha!

The Act:

“The Flying Third Person Wannabee Conundrums” …!

Aunt Mahitabel used to say, “Always remember to keep your fly zipped up, especially, when you’re going commando!”

We can see what he had for breakfast.

Time flies when you’re having fun.

What it’s like being Janus. Two heads are not better than one.

bizarre!

Head Fly…

Sap Sucker…

WOHO very rippling.

I beg your pardon butt head.

Erection to my defections.

Time flys like an arrow. Trouser flys like a…

We writhe on waves

Distance is gone, will we find out

How we have flies, will we find out

Speaking to the universe

Thinking it’s the best way to travel

And you have a fly

High as a kite, if you want one

Faster than light, if you want one

Speaking to the universe

Thinking it’s the best way to travel

—Froggy Blues: Best Way to Travel

“You know, I told you people something a long time ago, and it’s just as pertinent today as it was then. Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice – pull down your pants and slide on the ice.”

— Dr. Sidney Freedman

Most bizarre FA yet! Keep ’em coming, Teresa!!!

The ziptone coloring gave it away!

And they say it pays to advertise.

That’s not the fly you’re pulling on…

Draws flies.