The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for January 28, 2025

That’s gonna leave a scar.

He’s such a cut up.

After that, Conan the Barber will give her a nice hairdo.

Yikes.

And after her baby is born, the umbilical cord will be cut by Conan the Scissorarian.

Dr. Arnold Conan, Space Obstetrician, was called in whenever an Alien impregnation had been suspected.

Ow! Sounds painful!

Chainsaws were invented for just this reason.

She’s giving birth to a little Marvel.

Better than Conan the Hohel.

His bedside manner leaves something to be desired.

Well, that was barbaric.

That’s what got her in trouble in the first place.

Has he ever done this before? Has he ever done it successfully?

Crom?

Not sure that this is a Conan comic my dad would be eager to read…

Then he said: “I’ll be bach”

And tone down the lamentations, I have to concentrate.

Wasn’t it his “other sword” that got the woman pregnant in the first place?

Ewe!

Did he sterilize that thing?

“Blade, be true this day!”

You can still get that insurance money with out the drama!!!!

Sounds better than Conan the Episiotomy.

THATS 1 WAY 4 HER 2 DO THE SPLITS!

On behalf of all women-YIKES!!!!

Where’s nurse Grace Jones to grab it and take it after delivery?

Yep!!!! That would do it!

This is where Arnold got the idea for Twins.

“Mommy, I don’t get this comic. Can you explain it to me?”

Funny, yes, but in a truly horrifying way.

No.

For a moment, I thought of King Solomon.

Sadly, she’s firstly to become a goner: “Caesarean” comes from the Roman law lex Caesarea, which required that a baby be cut from the womb of a deceased mother.

This is what women’s health care will be like for the next 4 years anyway.

The future of reproductive healthcare in the USA.

That C-sections were named for Julius Caesar because he was delivered that way is an urban legend. The word “cesarean” comes from the Latin word for “cut,” and the Romans did C-sections only on women who were already dead or dying. Julius Caesar’s mother delivered him the normal way and lived for years afterward.

conan’s a cut above, but i’ll bet she still wanted to split when she heard that…

Hahaha! “Conquer your uterus” is not a phrase you hear too often these days. I wonder why?

There’s another joke here somewhere about Cesarian section when the woman is saying, “et tu, Brute?”

WTF?

Remember that movie where he was the cy-obgyn?