Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for December 18, 2024

A guy sends a text to his next-door neighbor:

“Bob, I’m sorry. I’ve been riddled with guilt and I have to confess: I have been helping myself to your wife when you’re not around, probably more than you. I know it’s no excuse but I don’t get it at home. I can’t live with the guilt any longer. I hope you’ll accept my sincerest apology. It won’t happen again.”

Feeling outrage and betrayed, Bob grabs his gun, goes into the bedroom, and without a word, shoots his wife.

Moments later the guy gets a second text: “Oops!! Sorry about that! Really should use spell check! That should be “wifi”."

I bet Nixon had great seats. Probably the owner’s box.

That “wiffy” thing is sad, and not surprising. Those may likely be the ones who pronounce “baw ci” as “mfbin loc.”

“A president liked sports” seems like a pretty low bar for belief.

Nixon was also reported to be a big baseball fan and, at the time, he supposedly hinted he would like to the next baseball commissioner.

8% of which people? “Wiffy” is the accepted pronounciation for Wi-Fi in Spain, for example – though not in Spanish-speaking Latin America. I guess it’s the same in other countries.

Nixon actually came up with a trick play, that George Allen, then coach of the Redskins, tried in a game. It ended up not working as planned though. He was also the last president to use the white house bowling alley on a regular basis.

And how many people pronounce “SyFy” as “siffy”?

Nixon drew up and sent a play to Miami in hope of beating the Cowboys in the Super Bowl.

Nixon went to football games has got to be the lamest RBION I have ever read. But here is the true story of Nixon supposedly calling in a play to a Redskins (remember them) game, believe it or not. You’ll need to copy and paste if you care to. >

And about half the people in the pharmaceutical industry pronounce WFI (Water For Injection) as wiffy

Well, “wifi” is a nonsense term anyway, so call it whatever you like. It’s supposed to hearken back to “hifi” but isn’t actually derived from any specific terminology. (Not to mention, the “fi” in “hifi” is from “fidelity” so it really shouldn’t rhyme with “hi” in any case.)

Nixon called a play for the Washington Redskins (that was their name at the time), and they lost 20 yards.

Maybe that’s why Nixon chose Gerald Ford as a VP. Those ex-football players can get the best tickets.

Well, wee-fee is common in Europe.

I can neither confirm nor deny that I read this comic.

Spell check would not have caught “wife”. Grammar check would.

60 million are retired.

That leaves 240 million to do the work.

There are 95 million in school.

Which leaves 145 million to do the work.

Of this there are 22 million employed by the government.

Leaving 123 million to do the work.

61 million are disabled.

Leaving 62 million to do the work.

15 million are collecting unemployment.

Leaving 47 million to do the work.

40 million are of working age, but not working and not actively looking for work.

Leaving 7 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces.

Which leaves 4.2 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 900,000 people in hospitals.

Leaving 3,300,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 3,299,998 people in prisons.

That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me.

And there you are,

Sitting on your a$$,

reading jokes !!