Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 14, 2019

By any means necessary.

Books don’t need that bat to convince me at all. I’m too sheepish to fight back.

What would be that one book Pig is holding and about to read: “War and Peace”?

A Tale of Two Cheeses?

They must be hard covers.

That’s a very aggressive literature.

We need more books like those.

Online reading counts too. But WHAT you read is crucial.

Tough books.

If you guys could update your information, and NOT make it go through any fact checking….

Reading, writing, arithmetic, set to the tune of a hickory stick. Our forebears knew how to get that education in you.

Those must be communist books, threatening people with weapons and forcing ’em to do things their way.

You don’t need to hit the books, in Russia, the books hit you! – Yakov Smirnoff

How to win friends and influence people.

Don’t cave in. Just tell them back off or you’ll break their spines. That’ll freeze them in their tracks. : )

I’ve heard it said that there is much violence in books… so it’s true!

Do what he says – those paper cuts can be nasty.

Presidency for Dummies…..unedited, video book available,

Guess who sent the books out to go door to door? The LIBRARIAN!

in fact, they weren’t asking at all.

I love reading but would rather read a book than my iPhone.

ASAP!

The Kindle and the easy availability of audio books are a real boon, though. I’ve read a fair number of classics now that I always “intended” to around to, but didn’t.

There is a huge difference between the kind of reading you do on a social network and read an actual book, though.

And strangely, people are now communicating through text, and it seems to be making them less literate,

Book them for attempted assault.

Pig should read Animal Farm. Then maybe the books would “leaves” him alone.

Sometimes I have to agree with Gru: “This is literature?”

Hate literature.

Game of Thrones and Field of Dreams?

Are those weapons of mass instruction?

Facebook newsfeed? There’s news on facebook? Cute kitty and puppy vids are news?

Join the book “club”.

I’ve learned a lot from the Internet. For example, before getting on the ‘Net, I had no idea about the guy on the grassy knoll or that the moon landing was faked. I even believed the propoganda about the earth being round. It’s amazing how ignorant I was before the Internet came along and taught me the truth.

When I hear someone say they don’t like to read, I wonder how they keep abreast of current events. I think of all of the great stories they’re missing out on. I don’t mean just the classics; everything from romance novels to murder mysteries to historical tomes, biographies and a hundred more subjects. I think our lives are becoming 30 second sound bites. As for texting, the shorthand and emojis that are used are just leading people further and further away from actually talking to each other. If you’re thinking ’ I bet she uses texting", you would be wrong. I don’t send them and I don’t read what I get; my cell phone is turned off unless I’m on a trip. Maybe ten people have my number and they know better than to call me. When I leave for a trip and turn the darn thing on, the first thing I do is delete each and every text message. I don’t care who it came from or when. I’m getting down from my soapbox now.

I’m safe- books consider me a friend !!! lol

Sounds like Rat’s kind of books.

Reading time – an offer you can’t refuse.

Just burn them. All.

Take that!, Zuckerberg

Pastis, would you please stop shilling for your latest Pearls collection.

Today it’s tldr. In high school there were synopses, including the one of The Great Gatsby that described Jordan Baker as “he” or “him” which didn’t work out so well. And watching the movie versions of Frankenstein was found to not improve the curve on grading the exams.

I’m currently reading "Love Your Enemies – Arthur Brooks ". It reads like a textbook and is very informative.

Come on, who is this? Stephen King?

I think I’m safe. I would like to think if such books came calling on me, my library would rise to my defense.

Personally I love books. I like the feel of them and of course love to read what is inside.

We should read more. Alas, I read mainly for entertainment and I’m one of the few among my friends who reads more than they watch videos/movies. I do have some friends who entertain themselves by reading history and biography, but when I’ve tried that, I just get bored. Of course, for half my career, I’d have fallen rapidly behind if I had not voraciously read books and articles about my field, so maybe I’ve served my time.

Overly-aggressive books: a sure sign of the Apocalypse….

Maybe if books had more emoji, so people could understand and know how to interpret them properly.