Frazz by Jef Mallett for October 17, 2021

Yeah, maybe it should be called “yardball”.

IIRC, the most dangerous occupation (per capita) in America is logger, with farmer a bit farther down the list, but for some odd reason we never see Jef Mallett trashing loggers and farmers the way he so often does football players.

I thought they were measured in football fields. (1)

The better question is, why are there only two football players that are allowed to use their foot?

Because it a Murican game. Otherwise it would be measured in meters.

A grade school I almost went to didn’t have football as a player had been killed earlier.

Would those guys be more average size if they hadn’t built up for sports?

Love the art gallery.

Why are most yards measured in feet?

Shouldn’t a football field measured in feet? … or … since it’s measured in yards, shouldn’t it be called a yardball field?

… or since they mostly carry and pass the ball with their hands, shouldn’t it be called handball?

Sometimes my yard looks like a field.

It’s measured in yards because it would take too damn long to mark stripes on the field every 10 feet…

Love the layout of this strip, especially how we see Caulfield being sent down the hall. Say what you want about Mallett, he is a talented comic strip artist. Also, he never uses the “copy and paste” lazy method that others do (cough “Garfield” cough); each panel is always drawn individually.

Because football is an American game, and we aren’t on the metric system. Why would we measure it in meters?

When working with a group of elementary-aged kids, I have learned to phrase the question as, “Are there any questions about what we were talking about?” I’ve dealt with too many smart-aleks and Caulfields.

An easy way to stop that behavior: “Good question! As a new assignment for the class, you’ll research…”

Just think of all the new football stadiums teams would need (demand) if fields were 100 meters long. Going ten meters for a first down would be harder.

I love Frazz. I hate football; these are not “athletes” who hurt others for sport.

Because feet and yards were used to measure length in the days when football fields were being laid down.

A football field is measured in feet, since there’s a stripe on the field every 15 feet, the goal lines are 300 feet apart, and a team has to move the ball 30 feet to be awarded a first down. All this is of course irrelevant to the point of today’s strip, which is that football is a vastly inferior athletic endeavor compared to running, swimming, and bicycling, which are not only superior to all other sports but are in fact the noblest activities in which anyone can spend his or her time.

I’d rather know why a “yard” is only three feet. I’ve never seen a front or back yard that small.

I have had a few Caulfield type students/Soldiers, which is why I now (almost always) ask “are there any questions about what we just went over?” :)

More football bashing…I guess this is some kind of therapy for Mallett. We get it, Jef.

The #1 rule of effective communication is “know your audience”, and I’ve gotta give Jef Mallett high marks for knowing that his own audience includes many readers who share his contempt for football and the people who play and enjoy it.

Why are yards in front (or back) of houses and yards for “measuring” so different in size?

Because it’s a game of inches, Caulie!

Mallet REALLY hates football.

That’s because children are playing football at a young age and getting injured!

And Caulfield isn’t asking questions like that so he’ll be sent to the Principal’s Office as punishment, either, but rather so he can engage the Principal in a preferred conversation.