Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 04, 2022

You don’t want to be unintentionally productive.

Best work goals to have.

my work goals are to read this strip every single day

That’s Pig’s to-do list. He doesn’t like to make a big to-do about anything.

Retired now but I used to work very hard. That was September 15, 1967.

Well, at least Pig has goals…right?

Just become a strictly observant Jew… You’re not allowed to do actual work on the Sabbath. Though I thought the story about not being allowed to turn on the lights was a bit over the top.

Avoid conflict. Lock Rat out of the house.

Avoiding work can be exhausting!!!!!!!!!

And broke!

Work is a four-letter word, eh Pig?

Pig has reached work-Nirvana.

Pig’s busy doing nothing!

Working the whole day through

Trying to find lot’s of things not to do

He’s busy doing nothing

Isn’t it just a crime

He’d like to be unhappy

But he never can find the time!

Gee…I don’t even have to write that.

Work goals? That’s what hockey players have.

Reminds me of George Costanza from Seinfeld, who’d come up with these elaborate schemes to avoid work. If he’d put as much effort into doing actual work he might have been reasonably successful.

No work means no money to bring the bacon Pig. Oh… Wait.

Pig is a true product of our educational system ;-)

my first boss told me, you can work hard or you can work smart. i wasn’t smart enough to understand what he meant, so i just worked enough to get by…

I try to work as little as possible, even when at work. Will finally retire in less than a year

It’s not that I’m lazy. It’s that I just don’t care.

I’m still working.

Being dumb AND lazy is not a good way to go thru life, Pig.

Work just as much as I did before retirement. Difference is: I enjoy it a whole lot more now : )

good plan…

All work & no play makes pig a dull swine.

he broke his first rule

Retired March 2020! Will he 80 soon…..worked from the age of 14….I would say I had a good run…..lol… enjoying not working but pandemic threw an anchor in my plans….=~{

work smarter not harder

You have joined a very large movement…..

So just by doing any work, Pig has surpassed his goal.

Me, I made a game out of it, and in ’82 enslaved computers (program once … enslaved for decades).

I developed an ability to know which projects were real and which would never go anywhere. The best project is one where you are a nameless minion that you don’t have to do any real work on because it is not going anywhere, but they have catered meetings with free lunches.

The unemployed have never swpt…and can never say they oveslept

A Maynard G. Krebs moment.

According to my retirement system, I’ll be able to retire about a month before I die.

That was too easy, Pig! Next time, try a harder one….

I still have some work goals that I should have completed over twenty years ago.

Spoken like a true lefty