That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for December 09, 2022

Margaret and Elizabeth tease poor Jane for wearing a dress (of all things) instead of linen curtains like a normal woman.

They would meet again few years later when Madeleine was in charge of the guillotine.

I see here it says that you are fluent in three languages and and graduated from Oxford, but you clearly don’t know how to put on make up.

“It’s been one hour of her standing there and not looking us in the eyes. She’s hired.”

I can say “Do you want ’fries with that?” in five languages!

Becassine, the early years…

/// At her in-person job application

Hulde’s Letter of Recommendation

was read out in her sight

in the hope that it might

help explain her last job’s termination.

/// When the note proved she hadn’t been fired,

her next mistress said, “OK, you’re hired.”

She had quit by herself

when they’d called Hulde “elf;”

teased because of the way she’s attired.

“All right, Miss Goodshoes. Since you’re a Legacy, we’re rather bound to take you into our sorority. But as an initial test of your fitness to be one of us, be prepared to go on a jock-strap raid tonight in the boys’ locker room. And lest you think that easy — these ones haven’t been washed in months!”

“Plus you’re a woman and a servant, so housekeeper or head cook is as high as you’ll ever go. No retirement plan so start saving now!”

“I see you have a degree in Liberal Arts……that’s as useless now as it will be in the future!”

“Yeah, you can just smoke that pipe on your own. As long as one of us is getting high, all the better that it’s you, the employer!!”

applicant: “CHILD, put down that cell phone until the interview is over”

mother:“You’re hired”

“You’ve the slimmest of résumés/

It contains not a word of praise/

But you’ll work for a pittance/

(A beggar’s remittance !)/

So we’ll give you a couple of days..”

Sarah, the parlor maid, silently contemplated just where she’d like to ram her umbrella…

It is a small blessing that they can at least dispense with that stupid question.

The supply of qualified childcare is in dearth

I’m the least qualified on earth.

I’ll make a great nanny

And show the qualities of my fanny

and take over after you die giving birth.

…And lastly, you will serve as my husband’s new mistress on week ends!

Esmerelda Scrooge had a rather different experience, being visited only by the Ghost of Christmas Fashion.

Her Ladyship needs to be wary../

This applicant is worse than scary

Her recommendations/

Are all fabrications…/

She’s hiring Typhoid Mary.

A Letter of Recommendation: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Letters in art" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, and Ecosia search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string Recommendation, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size, oil on panel painting. Other versions has the strip coloration image.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3041 (December 9, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.

I only have an 18 month plan, Ma’am. That’s how long it will take me to put your husband on his back and you out the door.

“It says on your resume that you’ve cleaned the royal cesspools of half of Europe. Most impressive.”

ok Ruthy, go behind the curtain and change into your evening dress so we can all go out to the bar and hook a few men who think we are rich.

“So, do you really think he would go for someone like you?”

Big change in attire from yesterday.

I see you can take care of yourself Ms. Hood. We have a few wolves here, so you best be prepared.

/// Lady Wyrmanger revels in sin.

Foes compete to see who’ll “do her in.”

So she plotted a ruse

to, her rivals, confuse:

Out in public she’s switched with a “twin.”

/// Since her ladyship’s always in trouble,

she is hiring a new body double.

The last one fled in fear.

An assassin came near;

close enough, on “her” cheeks, to see stubble.

/// Though the same height and equally pale,

her last decoy was destined to fail.

Lest she have to abandon

her plans for a stand-in,

she will not, this time, hire a male.

Angela submitted her slim resume’

And observed to her utter dismay

It was read over with sneers

That brought her nearly to tears

And basically ruined her day.

.

The sisters who lived in Manor Dolorous

Were Satana, Dirtrude, and Cloris

Although their clothing was nice,

Their hearts were like ice

Each grin like a velociraptor-saurus.

.

All the nearby peasants would say

That once Satan came up for Unholiday

And after the usual ritual slaughters

Engendered three evil daughters

One from each of his balls to purvey.

.

After procuring a mansion for them to dwell in

And teaching many ways to impel sin in

The surrounding rustic locales,

He left it up to those three gals

To spread evil ways and wreak h*ll in!

.

… That’s enough of a movie preview teaser

Of a horror film sure to be a crowd pleaser

In the lurid “Hammer” traditions

With bloody murder commissions

And large bosoms heaving in near-seizure …

These epics are growing outrageous/

They go on for pages and pages../

I shall henceforth refrain/

From inflicting more pain/

My affliction is clearlycontagious///

One verse (well, possibly two)/

Is the most that I’m going to do/

I’ve quite run amuck/

(And some of them suck!)/

Henceforth I’ll have mercy on you.

The position for which she’s applying/

Is completely convention-defying/

It’s involves supination/

And a slight deviation../

And she’s likely to exit crying..

The discussion is carefully muted/

For perhaps she is perfectly suited/

To the curious task/

(What is it ? Don’t ask!)/

The decision is hotly disputed..///

But I promised to stop at two/

And that’s what I’m going to do../

Line three and line four/

Ain’t there any more/

I’m leaving the rest up to you.

I can’t ever find Waldo in these things.

/// They were hiring a woman to clean,

but Maria wore red, white and green.

A subliminal clue

to what she’d rather do:

Be a cook of Italian cuisine.