Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for November 10, 2023

  1. The rat
    Ratkin Premium Member 12 months ago

    Dewey, Cheatem and Howe – someone had to say it.

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    David_the_CAD  12 months ago

    Well it depends. Is you suit intended to right a wrong, or just make you money?

    Either way the lawyer is the one who wins.

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    sirbadger  12 months ago

    I almost read CUTT wrong.

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    rasputin's horoscope  12 months ago

    I got a kick out of the sign for the law office I passed every day on my way to work: Dial & Lose. The odds got a little better when the added another partner: May.

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    fretlessman71  12 months ago

    What about the law offices of Dewey, Dickham & Howe?

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    cmxx  12 months ago

    Depending on what your suit’s about, you might save a lot of money and enjoy life more if you dumped all your notes and supporting files in that wastecan and went to the nearest ice cream shop.

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    keenanthelibrarian  12 months ago

    I think someone has had a hard time with lawyers – who that may be, I can only guess …

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  8. Loudmouth
    loudmouthbass  12 months ago

    Ditcher, Quick, and Hyde or Shaft, Shaft, and Finagle

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    SameAsOldFfred  12 months ago

    A poser: Is Trump capable of sweating beads?

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    Imagine  12 months ago

    Depends on how frivolous your suit is.

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    Richard Howland-Bolton Premium Member 12 months ago

    Then there’s Private Eye magazine’s Sue, Grabbit & Runn

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    Out of the Past  12 months ago

    What people overlook is that the cut throat outfits usually find it easier to cut their client’s throat.

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  13. Alexander the great
    Alexander the Good Enough  12 months ago

    I’ve always favored Pat Oliphant’s “Bushmaster, Cobra, and Asp, LLC”

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    Mark Jeffrey Premium Member 12 months ago

    There used to be a law partnership in my home town called “Coffin, Mew, and Clover” which always sounded really weird.

    My grandmother had a fake book for hiding valuables in, titled on the spine as “Tryem and Chancitt”.

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    Mark Jeffrey Premium Member 12 months ago

    Having been through a few legal situations, I would always pick the scariest firm. If they are already on your side, they can’t be hired against you.

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    Differentname  12 months ago

    In ‘The Force’ by Don Winslow a tough law&order cop spends the first 200 pages talking about how much he hates a particular defense attorney who always gets his clients off. As soon as the cop’s dirty secrets come out, he runs straight to the lawyer he hates.

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    Random Nick Premium Member 12 months ago

    99% of lawyers give the rest of them a bad stereotype.

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    Funniguy  12 months ago

    Steppe, Tripp & Fawl Esqs.

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    sandpiper  12 months ago

    A favorite ‘kick them’ theme. Always gets predictable responses.

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    Space_cat  12 months ago

    Yeah, which evil, blood sucking parasite is most likely to “bend the rules” in your favor!

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    FredBurr  12 months ago

    Fresh out of law school, I took a job with a local firm. Three weeks into it, the senior partner told me, "This isn’t some big ‘truth party’ out there. Our clients expect us to do whatever it takes to win, regardless of something like ‘truth.’ " I left working for this slimeball within the month.

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    bigbadwolf49  12 months ago

    Every defendant is considered innocent until proven broke (Larsen T. Pettifogger, lawyer)

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    royq27  12 months ago

    Get the money, then stand on principle…

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    garysmigs  12 months ago

    judge shopping has much more favorable results though.

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    retjeff  12 months ago

    senior partner, Boyd Dewey.

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    thelordthygod666  12 months ago

    I applied for law school, but then I passed the ethics test and they said that disqualified me.

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    magicwalnut  12 months ago

    There is a recurring TV ad in Michigan, in which a scary looking lawyer intones, “That’s what we do! We win!”

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    Call me Ishmael  12 months ago

    “ I don’t recall” is not lying..(when the Fifth Amendment is not quite enough.)

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    proclusstudent  12 months ago

    Trickem, Dickem and Dumpem. A short lived law firm of Nixon, and John and Ted Kennedy.

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  30. Hobo
    MeGoNow Premium Member 12 months ago

    They should go for the left door. Those lawyers are obviously even more conniving that the others.

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    Teresa Burritt (Frog Applause) creator 12 months ago

    Lawless & Lawless, Attorneys at Law.

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    kenmareinc  12 months ago

    long ago when was pretty young my family was talking about local lawyers; my grandfather said “vandiver was the biggest shyster in town” I asked who do you use and he said “vandiver”. So i asked why he used him and he replied—-"you wanta win dont you? circa 1955 or so,

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    Mike Baldwin creator 12 months ago

    If you’re shopping for a lawyer you’ve already lost.

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    tpcox928  12 months ago

    The dirtiest lawyers win, in part because complicit judges allow them to.

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    Another Take  12 months ago

    Phare Play And Justice went out of business decades ago.

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    eddi-TBH  12 months ago

    Guess which ones are poor but honest?

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    eddi-TBH  12 months ago

    Left: Live on pro bono stipend. Right: Under investigation for multiple ethics violations.

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    samadartson  12 months ago

    98% of lawyers give all the rest a bad name.

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    gigagrouch  12 months ago

    Ruly, Kempt, Sheveled, & Couth

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  12 months ago

    Hart,Burns,and Belcher

    And Managing Editor—Mr.Fuller Bull

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