The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for November 24, 2024

Should be renamed MashedoldDon.

The worst kind of pet, a lap woolly mammoth.

Of my friends in high school got a St Bernard puppy. He still thought it was a lap dog when he was all grown up.

(And believe me, it wasn’t easy to teach a mammoth to bark.)

“Show next guest roll over play dead trick.”

Leaves hair on the sofa too!

On the plus side: They haven’t been successfully burgled since they got him.

And once we get the jumping up under control we have to work on hum*ing their leg.

No jumping up needed, teach him not to stomp down on guests.

yeah, boyhowdy!

Woolly ever learn?

Is he housebroken? Or is the house broken?

Just wait until PETA finds out you’ve been training him to do tricks. Just you wait ……..

And I liked him, too! Awwwwww

One of my favorite Far Side episodes was on the other day: “French Mammoth.”

Good idea.

“Oog! Go get Cesar Milanderthal to help us.”

“Give me your paw” would probably be another ill-advised trick to teach it.

Apparently a little known fact about elephants ( or mammoths) : they cannot jump.

I hope he’s housebroken.

It’s really hard to ignore the mammoth in the room.

Teaching him to go outside to use the toilet would be my first ambition.

Smart critter: Do unto others before they do unto you.

They must live in a McMansion Cave to have room for a pet like that!

Caveman tawking same langwich as bear and doggie making e z to unnerstan.

Do they have a Sabertooth Tiger to take care of the mice? Because you know the Mammoth won’t do it. Nice kitty….

I wonder if he sleeps on the bed?

Who remembers this old Timex commercial: elephant steps on the watch and trainer picks up the watch when the elephant steps back.Announcer: what time is it?Trainer (holding up mangled watch by strap): time to get a new Timex.Announcer (as screen fades to black): well it worked during rehearsal.

Time for some Flintstones. The mammoths were well-trained to do a variety of things.

We do lose more guests that way. Say, when next time your mom visit?

LOL