Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for January 20, 2025

“Oh, OK. In that case, you’re disqualified for misrepresenting your content. Now neither of you get anything. Good day.”

Where’s Crankshaft?

Oh my goodness, Emily won the contest but got Amelia to take her place! I never saw that plot twist co…wait a minute. What contest? When did the twins switch? Why did they switch? The last time we saw the Sentinel office was back in late November, when Emily was “shadowing” Skipper for a school report. Was there some whole contest storyline going on in Batiuk’s other strip, “Skip Rawlings: One-Armed Newshound,” that we missed? How dare TB distract us from these exciting goings-on with all that nonsense about the crotchety school bus driver!

Given that this newspaper has less circulation than the blood in Les Moore’s brain, how big can that check be?

Rod Serling, holding lit cigarette: "Imagine, if you will, a world where one adores a minuet, The Ballet Russe, and a crepe suzette— “But Emily loves to rock and roll, A hot dog makes her lose control—” (stares at cue cards) “What, that’s it? THAT’S the ‘big twist’?! They’re twins? A town with 20 people, and no one’s noticed before? They have color-coded outfits! Who wrote this?!” (M. Knight slowly sinks into his chair) “‘Loses control over a hot dog?!’ Did Emily just learn those are made of floor sweepings and pig butts?!” (storms off set) “Golly, what’s the next big twist? We find out Emily’s stupid essay about lord knows what, because we’ll never be told, is on the front page?!”

“Before the papers go out” i.e. carelessly stacked next to the apartment rental supplements and the local “penny saver” on Denny’s doorside rack.

We only had Cranky for a week. I guess once a month is all we can hope for now?

I liked it better when the writer turned out to be the Dowager Countess’ butler.

So dark shirt one is suppose to be the eevil twin eh.

I would say I’m not very impressed by Skip’s abilities as a reporter if he couldn’t tell that “Emily” wasn’t really Emily, but that would presume I ever thought Skip had any abilities as a reporter to begin with.

I don’t see how this can get any better.

I sure like his hat. Think I need one.

Only ace newsman from the 1940’s are allowed to wear that type of headgear.

P 1: “…Before the papers go out…”…go out directly into the trash/recycling bins without being read that is.

FRAUD!!!

Pen name or plagiarism???

So this week the twins are in their early 20s, while a few weeks ago they were 12. It’s called (bad) writing!

“Don’t get cute, kid, I haven’t given you the check yet!”