Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for January 09, 2022

A month late for the Christmas that passed. Maybe baby Jesus will be talking in time for Christmas 2022.

I envision a Sacred foreskin and baby teeth ascending to Heaven with a Holy compost heap, dandruff and toenails.

The power of suggestion.

I might be willing to spend $1000 to have a conversation with Jesus. However, I have a feeling that at the end of the hour I would consider I had overpaid.

Actually, the baby Jesus had the most eloquent gift of speech. It’s in the Koran, Sura 19:30.

Never could understand how people can walk bareheaded outdoors in winter.

Especially with snow falling.

So Jesus died when he was a baby? They sure can’t get their stories right.

I thought Hunk-Ra got vaccinated a few months back.

“… sessions priced at $1,111 per hour. (She likes the synchronicity of the number.)”

So do I! What a lovely number!

What about adolescent Jesus??

More right wing wacko stuff.

I remember when snow would routinely bury my car. Back in the winter of ‘77 – ’78 I didn’t see my car for three months.

There’s an old, old story about a tourist visiting a cathedral. The guide is showing the tourist the church’s impressing collection of saintly relics. “This,” the guide says, displaying a human skull which has been ornamented with gold and jewels and rests in an ornate box, “is the genuine skull of John the Baptist!”

“And what is this one?” the tourist asks, pointing to a smaller skull in a box beside it.

“That’s the skull of John the Baptist as a baby!”

Those who believe in Jesus (and would want to speak with him) believe he was raised from the dead – so his ghost isn’t around to ‘channel’. Those who don’t believe in Jesus have no wish to speak to him. And those stupid enough to want to talk with his ghost usually don’t have $1,000 to waste… Unless they inherited and haven’t wasted it all yet.

So Boopsie is having her own “vision on the road to Damascus.”

The Catholic Church has never been the Church of Jesus. Rather, it is, from the very get-go, the Church of Paul/Saul. Paul’s vision on the road to Damascus was that this quasi-mythical Christian religion that he was supposed to be persecuting had, with a bit of tweaking, tremendous potential for franchising to the Gentiles. He followed through on that vision, too, founding the Church of Rome in the process. Boopsie as well seems to have just realized a franchising opportunity of her own…

I’m a Christian, and I declare this to be funny.

Climate Change is a hoax. Natural Weather Patterns are just that, entirely natural.

South Eastern Ontario Canada, Jan 9th and it’s raining.

Somehow I don’t think Jesus in any form is a big money maker anymore

‘’a real earner’’?? I guess. Look at all the dough, the various churches have made on that fairytale.

I’ll be doing a talk today about the 12 year old Jesus in the temple. I love this story. Next week I run on to baptism.

Well, that’s one of those rare things that was thought up, thought through and acted on that still went totally sideways.

It takes an innocent to channel an innocent. e.g. Boopsy.

Really. Isn’t it past time to stuff Christianity and all its flavors into a folklore museum and move on?

“…..Two men sayin’ their Jesus – one of ’em must be wrong.” – Mark Knopfler, “Industrial Disease.”

Timing is okay. Might be considered other wise earlier.

Plenty of churches brag that they have “relics” of saints—yet how many actually do? In other words, how many caskets contain what they claim to contain? (Say that three times fast…..) The answer, of course, is zero.

Did anyone else noticed that Boopsie is catching snowflakes on her tongue while B.D. is talking about being older?

Boopsie, the Chosen One. Couldn’t happen to a nicer lady.

Thought they lived in Malibu.

Way to go, B.D. … Have fun changing her diaper.

Baby Jesus, the capitalist years.

There’s a line in the carol “Away in a Manger” that says “But the little lord Jesus no crying he makes” which was supposed to be evidence of his perfection. Apparently there was some controversy about that line as crying is a baby’s natural means of communication. I did think about that song when Boopsie started “channeling” a crying baby Jesus (coincidentally just after B.D. said it was a potential money maker).

I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t charge any fees.

When Michelangelo was painting the ceiling of the Sisting Chapel, he notice an elderly lady coming in to pray. He decided to play a joke on her, so he called down from his scaffold, “I am the Lord, Jesus Christ!” Lady continues to pray. He called again, louder, “I am the Lord, Jesus Christ!”

Lady looks up from her prayers and calls back, “You hush your mouth now, I’m talkin’ to your mother!”

Just in time for Orthodox Christmas?

Do they have to set aside 15% in a trust fund for when Baby Jesus grows up?

Claiming to channel adult Jesus would likely get you killed in some jurisdictions. BTW has anyone else noticed that the men in the Doonesbury universe haven’t aged as much as the women?

When we moved to northern California 35 years ago, I asked a contractor what it would cost to install air conditioning in our house. He’d grown up here, and he said, Lady, just live here a few years: you’ll find you don’t need it. There’s maybe one hot week a summer where it goes up in the 80s. That was in ‘87, and now we enjoy the few weeks a summer when it’s in the 70’s that he grew up with and those days are such a relief. But very often it is beastly hot—and we have that AC now. You have to. Solar powered in our case so as not to be making the problem worse for the generations to come. My kid graduated from high school on a 113F day with ambulances on standby, water bottles passed out to everyone in the crowd and a few older people passing out anyway and being whisked off by the paramedics.

$1,111 per hour…whatta racket…

Jesus doesn’t work that way.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts%208:9-25&version=NIV

This sounds totally legitimate way of earning some holiday cash and it would be a waste of Boopsie’s talent to not do it. After all, there is that woman who was selling her farts in a jar for about 35,000 a week. She had to quit because of her bad diet to produce the farts. I don’t fault her, but the fools who bought the bloody things.

I like seeing Boopsie aging just like BD is.

There’s always the Kennedys…father and son.

And now we know how BD got his name BC-AD, never mind HunkRa our hero is from the Year Zero

Problem with ch anneling Baby Jesus is that he hasn’t learned to talk yet.

Channel “The Little Drummer Boy” and you’ll have themusic rights.