Tom Toles for March 11, 2020

People do badly at estimating probability. It’s not in our brain wiring. We can learn to do the math, but math doesn’t really get to the level of “feeling”. Now add that we’re even worse when estimating probabilities for “bad” outcomes, consistently feeling that the bad outcome is more likely than the math shows. Now make the bad outcome “death” and throw in an administration that’s made lying their primary attribute, so we can’t even do the math… is it any wonder  that people are getting close to panic?

He’s knows more about everything than everybody!

Since Trump got rid of those who DO know (and gagged the one who might) …

He has, in his own opinion, “a natural talent for viruses”. Yes, he does seem dedicated to spreading disease better than anyone else.

I definitely agree with the comment at the bottom right hand corner.

Quarantine him for just another 9 months. That should make us all a bit safer.

Maybe offer the virus a great bigly huuuuge hamberder…

All the cartoonists on these sites make the COVID-19 virus look the Cavorite Sphere in the 1964 science fiction movie, “First Men ‘In’ the Moon,” adapted from the novel by H. G. Wells.

{Off-topic:}

Words ending with “…turn” – {4 beats/line}

Whether to Joe or to Bernie we turn,

we simply canNOT let The Donald return.

So vote for whomever’s the Dems’ nominee,

so Trump won’t control our [destiny] des-ti-nee,

so the effects of The Donald we overturn.

… Coda:

We wish that his Base // might at long last discern

that they ought to chase // him off, – then adjourn.

{Will NEVER they learn // The Donald to spurn?}

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

“The Viral Point of View”

I dreamed I met a Coronavirus, Down at the nano-scale,

And asked it why it was so mean, To make us humans ail.

Pulsating slightly (it had no mouth), As if it sensed my question,

The thought came thru, “I don’t know, you’re just for my ingestion.”

.

I tried to make it understand, Its kind was very rude

To make our president look bad, Perhaps not get his term renewed.

The virus thought it humorous, Big chunks of meat afraid

That tiny specks such as it, Could rain on his parade.

.

I said our president is wise, And knows of many things.

The virus scoffed and sneered at me, “Whenever pigs get wings!”

The dream was getting very weird, And then I came to, waking.

Trump was bloviating views, And not much sense was making.

.

The scientists around him stood, And tried to look unfazed

By nonsense coming from his lips, As if from someone crazed.

They tried not to roll their eyes, You could see how hard they tried,

As the president continued to rant, While increasing numbers died.

.

Mid-way between atom and star, Humans think they are God’s work,

So why are we so badly led, By such an ignoramus jerk?

His GOP pals are cringing inside but god forbid they should do the right thing for we the people…it’s party first with them….

trumps wisdom comes from his gut and comes out of his …. Not to worry America, you are under divine care between Pence and trump.

{Off-topic:}

And Putin Smiles – {4 beats/line}

Putinesque is the Trumpites’ derision

of Dems’ eternally-ongoing collision

as their Center postures against their Left,

so their party is split, – perennially cleft. – - -

- – - The Trumpites RELISH the Dems’ division;

it’s the reason why they fulfill their vision: -

- the Trumpite plurality thusly assails

to drive America off the rails. …

… And Putin smiles // at his devious wiles.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

I’ll tell you what it reminds me of: the D&D monster called a beholder.

https://tinyurl.com/uffltd3

5 days ago – President Trump’s economic adviser Larry Kudlow is continuing to claim the COVID-19 coronavirus is “contained” as the number of cases rise.

I Don’t Want Our Coronavirus Numbers To Go Up. … I don’t need to have the numbers double because of one ship” — Trump explains

The administrations response to Covid-19 (or rather the lack thereof) reminds me of John Adams’ plea in the musical 1776 over the Continental Congress’ inability to make a decision when he laments, “Then God, Sir, Get Thee to it – For Congress never will.”

Does it know it can get infected by grabbing strange pussy?

Watching a pandemic mudslide.

Stop me if you’ve heard this before.

“How can we deliver more public services to the people?”

“Tax cuts!”

“How can we get big money out of politics?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What’s the solution to our health-care crisis?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What should we do about immigration?”

“Tax cuts!”

“Is there anything that can be done to stop the disastrous effects of climate change?”

“Tax cuts!”

“Our roads and bridges are going to ruin. How can we fix them?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What can be done about the rising tide of white nationalism and bigotry?”

“Tax cuts!”

“Jobs are fleeing overseas. How can we rebuild our economy here at home?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What solution is available for the undemocratic abuses of gerrymandering?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What’s the cure for coronavirus?”

“Tax cuts!”

“What’s the greatest, most disastrous crisis our nation has ever faced in its entire history?”

“Tax cu … oops, whoa, no, almost fooled me there. Benghazi!”

Break his thumbs?/s

Oh no, on Rasmussen, the resident’s Approval Index (2nd graph) is starting to follow the stock market index! What did he do wrong, I wonder?

https://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/politics/trump_administration/prez_track_mar11

“who knows what..”

is not a question, but Ts answer to whos on first (spoiler warning: NOT him)

The “Who-Nose” sounds like a Dr Suess character.

Go hang out with the Mar-A-Lago billionaires & Lobbyists.

Please.

An article in The Atlantic, by McKay Coppins: – “The Billion-Dollar Disinformation Campaign to Reelect the President” [“How new technologies and techniques pioneered by dictators will shape the 2020 election”] … https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2020/03/the-2020-disinformation-war/605530/

I’ve been thinking that Trump should be drawn and quarantined, and it’s nice to see that Tom T. has already done the first part for us.

[with insincere apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan]

I am the very model of a new and deadly vi-er-us

Plunging stocks and losses mounting? No need to call the IRS

Just do what Pontius always did, and wash your hands quite thoroughly

Or catch a case of Cov 19— in all its deadly purity

Remember when you sneeze to do the famous fabled Dracula

(And snort into your elbow but by no means to your scapula)

Avoid all crowds, or even folks—the hermits have the right idea

Remember that the virus never fears us, only fears a fear

You must always wear your mask, whether Halloween or Labor Day

We’ll get right through this tiny jolt if only we all kneel and pray

With Preacher Pence our Exodus from viral Egypt is assured

And on our exit we must all to Donald Trump flip QUITE a bird!