Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 31, 2023

Do it, Rat, do it!

Does Mark Zuckerberg even have hoohaws?

Try to not use the computer Rat, that would settle it…

It’s like those websites that ask “Do you want me to remember you?” or “Do you trust this computer?”. But it asks you again every single time.

RAT. Mark Zuckerberg wants to know, are you positively sure you do not want notifications turn on again.

Your 3,430 no replies suggest you are in doubt.

Every breath you take,

Every move you make,

Every bond you break,

Every step you take,

Zuck is watching you…

Every single day,

Every word you say,

Every game you play,

Every night you stay,

Zuck is watching you…

(Other Big Brothers are watching, listening to, and stalking you, too. Apologies, sorta, to The Police…)

Forget the notifications, I’d just want to kick him in the hoohaws. And then do it to Jeff Bezos. And then the rest of the billionaires.

Honestly i dont think anyone would care otherwise

Elon Musk’s greatest achievement might be making Zuckerberg only the second most hated social medial owner.

Hmm… Makes me glad I got assassinated on Facebook, though I was initially annoyed when my decade-old school-based account was nuked without warning or explanation. (I was allowed to download my data. I then searched for a reason in the last few months, but couldn’t find a hint, so I concluded some gamester killed me. Possibly political from years before?)

Happy Halloween !

Speaking of which, whatever happened to that cage match he was going to have with Elon Musk?

Best advice Stephan has ever given.

I guess nothing bad happened to him in Seattle (Err Lake Forrest Park) where somebody secretly switched Stephens Beer with Coffee

This!

I guess we evolved from oompah-loompahs.

This drives me crazy. You can only choose between “yes” and “remind me later”.It makes me so mad. They took away our option to say no. This cr4p shouldn’t be legal.

Thank you, Stephen! I thought I was the only one getting that darned notification over and over again!

Do you want to install our app?How about now?Install our app!Please install our app, we paid developers a fortune to make it. It does 2 more things than using a browser, and nearly as well.

Part of me wants to kick him in the hoohaws just for his part in creating Famebook.

Zuckerberg will just delete your message, just like he does with everything else.

I know something’s aren’t backed up in my cloud, I don’t WANT those things backed up. Just leave me alone you stupid notification badge.

Kick him anyway!

A close second is how many times I respond “yes” to “Do you trust this device with which you just connected for the 837th time?”

Facebook: Not even once.

Probably best to go ahead and do it, just to be on the safe side. Take video.

You get Zuckerberg, I’m going after Gates.

Hoohaws. LOL.

Might be difficult to find Zuck’s hoohaws to kick him in but if you want to kick Elon’s, it’s easy. X marks the spot!

How I feel about McAfee on Win. 10, uninstalled it, still it pesters me! Not listed on notifications, but it’s somewhere lurking! I have my own antivirus, wouldn’t pick them if they were the last ones in the world!

I’ve never touched Facebook, so I don’t experience that particular version of web-nagging, but I get extremely annoyed by CNN.com always asking me if I want the new summarized every morning, no matter how many times I click “No.” Also, LinkedIn e-mails that ask you to confirm if you know someone…but they don’t give you the option of saying you don’t, so you just delete the e-mail and those confirm requests keep on coming…

Great! Do you want to turn notifications on? :DJust wanted to see the Zuck getting kicked… :P

Every time I sign into Microsoft outlook, it asks if I want MS to remember the password to save time. It never does. The engineers at MS are not too smart.

i used to have hoohaws

Rat takes it for granted that there is someone who actually cares and monitors the situation.

Read the footnotes, Rat. A total of 3.432 attempts are required.

Wow… How did Rat fly that one under the censor nasty?

He’s an alien. Not sure.

Jeez Rat!

“Do you want a notification to remind you of the notification that you turned off the notification about the notification to notify you of more notifications?” (Me goes screaming into the night…)

There is an easy solution, just don’t use what ever Mark Zuckerberg is offering. It may look like a service, but the reality it makes you part of the product, since you’re the viewer of the ad space Mark is selling.

So many people would take Rat up on that offer.

It’s AI, I say. They just do not listen, as some internet help desks prove.

I like to compete in historical fencing – Agrippa, Capo Ferro, etc – so I post on my page “man, I can’t wait to stab some folks tonight!” BAM! Three days in FB jail.

When do we get around to Wikipedia editors who accuse you of “vandalism” even though you’ve barely opened your mouth?

Rat, try the browser add-on “Fluff Busting Purity” (formerly known as “Facebook Purity”).

Hoo? Zuckerberg. Hah!

Let’s be perfectly clear, Zuckerberg doesn’t have hoohaw. He’s got ha-ha-s.

Ask him! Ask him! Ask him!

How can we get him to kick Elon Musk too?

He will just delegate the job to some low-level flunky. And fire him if he demands workman’s comp.

Also freakin’ google wanting to save passwords. NO NEVER!! I do not want passwords saved anywhere! Clouds will weep eventually just like everything else. I’ll save passwords my way.

Why make threats that are impossible

Save a kick for Musk,too.

Maybe this is how we get Big Tech to behave. Better than Congress.

Hey Rat, do you want “Notifications” turned on?

Good for you, Rat!

But I’m not sure even such a threat will have any effect on mostly automated operations….