The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for November 27, 2024

That should give it some tang.

Bonus grease stains for the next 50 loads if the dryer doesn’t go up in flames first

Coudn’t Mama Gargle thaw it by throwing a spell on it? ( Sorry Mama)

There will be bruises and broken bones.

Let’s start well!

It’s going to be a great Thanksgiving Day.

I hope you didn’t add a dryer sheet.

Sounds like another Thanksgiving Pizza

My microwave has a “defrost” setting…

You’re going to end up with an awfully dry bird.

turkey jerky for Thanksgiving!

The dishwasher might have been a better choice.

Oy! Not only will it ruin the dryer, but it will render the turkey bruised, tender, and drowning in its own juices…..aaaaaacckk!

Why don’t you deep fry a frozen turkey? But make sure you do it in the kitchen not outside. Thats always fun!

No comment needed. Gladys’ is head of her cooking class. And this is the truth, knew a lady that used to wash her Collards and Mustard on rinse cycle in washing machine. Boy O Boy or GAL!

I put a turkey in the fridge 4 or 5 days before Thanksgiving one time. It still had ice in it when I cooked it, but it turned out perfect

Awwwww nothing like a little dryer lint to go with the Thanksgiving Turkey

fluffed or air dried? I’ve learned that from Home Improvement. :D

Before stuffing the turkey ya might want to check for one of the socks that go missing in the dryer.

Sounds like they need a new dryer. The one they have is going to be beat up from bouncing a frozen heavy turkey.

Particularly in the South they deep fry turkeys. The quickest way to get a new house is to get your deep fryer set up next to your house on the patio and lower a frozen turkey into that hot oil. The oil will almost explode as all that frozen water/fluids flash instantly to steam. Immediately after that, the propane burner lites it all up and you have fire everywhere. Ta Da, one new house coming up!!! You will get to enjoy your new house as soon as you get out of the burn unit.

Mine’s defrosted and I’ll put it in the brine for 24 hours

This turkey tastes fuzzy. Did you clean the lint screen first?

(This will be my last post for quite a while. I suffered a stroke a few weeks ago and while the prognosis is very good for me, the physical recovery is going well, but slowly. I’m like most, I’m an impatient patient. Thank you all for your likes and kind replies and as the aphorism goes; “I’ll see you in the funny papers!” Stay well and blessings to you all.)

Oh my that’s hilarious and on brand! Better keep your coat on and head out to the Honey Baked Ham store or Bob Evans Brutus. Oh and Gladys darling, your microwave and oven can both be used for defrosting.

It tenderizes it at the same time!

This would be funny, if there weren’t people that have already tried this in real life.

What can I say. Most blonde women I know are very intelligent women. She is a dumb blond and that is going to be a very expensive turkey when they have to replace the clothes dryer…….

Stuff like this runs in the family….poor Wilberforce!

Just the kind of thing we’ve come to expect from her cooking.

These two are indeed heaven-sent soulmates!

We are having Thanksgiving this year with our neighbors from Venezuela. Don’t know what to expect but it should be fun.

Don’t think some idiot won’t actually try that now that he’s seen it done in a comic!

Gladys is the turkey this year.

You will need a new dryer.

you should have tried to brine it in the washing machine instead

Oh, Gladys…I hope you didn’t throw a dryer sheet in with the turkey! LOL And a very happy Thanksgiving to the creators! I hope your day is filled with family, food, and football!! Enjoy!

I’m going to pretend I didn’t just read that.

YIKES!! That’s what a sink/tub full of cold water is for … Gladys, you’re supposed to have more sense.

Happy Thanksgiving to the Born Loser team ♥ You never fail to tickle my funny-bone.

Martha Stewart recipe?

here in japan we save the bath water from day to day (the bath is just for soaking, not washing). gladys could’ve chucked the bird in the bath to thaw it out… ☺

Hope she used a fresh dryer sheet!

This Thanksgiving the family tries vegetarian food. The turkey ends up in a shallow grave in the backyard.

well, it’ll be tender, that’s for sure