Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for December 26, 2024

Oookaay.

In a world where there really is a “Scooter’s Coffee Frisco Bowl,” easy jokes about a Dust Bowl tend to fall a little short.

“What are you doing, Da——Sorry, force of habit.”

I don’t know that they’ll ever top the Weed-Eater Bowl for silly sponsorships.

Thinking the other day all the bowl games that used to be on in the 70’s compared to now, a lot different.

Like to see one called the Tater Tot Bowl.

“It’s the game where the teams compete to score more insults than the other side and leave their opponents utterly eviscerated!”

“You mean this is—”

“Yes! The Diss ’em Bowl!”

“So what’s this game?”

“Football, you moron.”

How about the Ty-D-Bol Bowl from Flushing, NY?

Before you know it we will have the American Standard Toilet Bowl.

I think American Standard should sponser a bowl game – the American Standard Toilet Bowl

Football, HUMBUG

I wonder if Taylor Swiff was in the audience.

Ha ha, it’s funny because Swifter Dust…..um….I got nothing.

this game is brought to you by everythings better with bluebonnet on it

Next Year…..

Only real college football fans watch that bowl game…….popcorn included!

It’s a new concept—a playoff game played in installments, ten minutes a week for six weeks: the Serial Bowl!

Though we now snark about silly corporate bowl names, the fact is these things have always been commercial. Remember the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans? Named for and sponsored by the Louisiana sugar industry. Orange Bowl in Florida? The orange growers, of course (not to be outdone by the Citrus Bowl, sponsored by those who grew lemons and limes). Cotton Bowl? Texas cotton farmers.

What’s changed is not the habit of naming events as a means of advertising, but rather that corporate names have been getting sillier. “Cotton Bowl” does not sound silly. “Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl” (a real thing) does.

I hear the Swiffer Dust Bowl, originally played in Cleveland, is now being played in Tallahassee. That’s right, we’re talkin’ about a Bowl Movement!

I’ll let myself out…

Happy house of Crankshaft!!!!!

A real one: the Snoop Dogg bowl. Sigh.

My favorite is the Duke’s Mayo Bowl. (January 3rd) The head coach of the winning team gets gets a giant jar of mayonnaise dumped on his head.

aaaand were back with the football nonsense

Better than the Broken Chips Bowl

For a second, I thought this might be a KC Chiefs/Taylor Swift reference then remembered the last thing Tom would want to do is reference an actual living person.

If this isn’t a real name for a bowl game, it should be.

I’m surprised that Swifter hasn’t really bought sponsorship of a bowl.

i wonder why a company never started a cereal bowl haircutting company haircuts were brutal as a kid

I miss the Outback Bowl.

So, then, no Ralph going over to Crank’s to thank him for his touching gift and maybe showing the home movies to Ed and Pmm, who are actually in them and, one would think, might wish to relive their youth/childhood! No, instead we get yet another football game, a lame pun, and Pmm walking in with a bowl of popcorn because she can’t be sitting on the sofa with the men during the game (Did she just wait until the game was underway to make popcorn? She wasn’t there with them when they put it on? No one said at the breakfast table “Boy, I can’t wait for today’s Swiffer Dust Bowl showdown between Disco Tech and Barely Normal!”?) So much for holiday goodwill.

It’s Swiffer, not Swifter. Unless Tom was trying to do a parody name, he got it wrong.

Where’s The Toilet Bowl(with two lousy teams)??