Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for November 29, 2013

Brad — First lesson in marriage.

Toni is so cute! My Way? She knows she’ll get her way, one way or the other.

“♪And We Did It…Myyyy Waaaaay!♫”“Same Difference, Different Similarities”“Heads I Win, Tails You Lose”or “I’m Never Wrong….Riiiiight?”

Who let a Jaegermonstor in here??

I say whoever uses the most toilet paper gets to choose!

already breaking him in

I can tell that they’re really going to enjoy being with each other…. – And it’s good to get to observe different things about how the other operates….. makes little things like this become fun, and that cliché: “It’s all about give and take”…. it is true, for what it’s worth… how flexible one is, and how reasonable one is… if someone is a little belligerent or quick to “battle” over a matter, it’s not necessarily going to spell doom and gloom, but it is something to watch out for, when it comes to personalities meshing….

they still got a long way to go and i hope they have more of these for another few months

Wait until they talk about money! The biggest cutter when it comes to relationships…but it doesn’t have to be: http://www.MoneyCoachingInstitute.com

“Sponsored” by:Lett Dry Dishwasher Detergent… from Yezdier Products… “Don’t get in the way of a good clean!” – Struggle Fabric Softener…. “Part liquid detergent, part softener sheet… we didn’t feel like making them both, so we figured we’d slap ’em together!”… – Tried laundry detergent… “We’ll do our best… but it would help if you didn’t get your clothes so dirty!”… -

Call Of Doody bathroom tissue… “See why it’s the number two selling product out there, and at the right price!” – And by:L’aim toothpaste… "With new capless tube, you’ll have to find something else to argue about!’…

I hang toilet paper over the front as years ago when I hung it over the back by the wall I noticed these red streaks on the wall, this went on for months til I discovered that nail polish from all the ladies scraped against the back wall when they pulled it down. From then on it has hung over the front and no more polish on the wall. Problem solved.

Lack of compromise is why few relations last. This behavior, if she is serious, may end this relationship quite soon if not later. Good to have a two bathroom place, one hers and one his.

Give up, Brad.

Remember that Sheryl Crow comment about using one square at a time?…..

She’s so right about the forks…how can she be SO wrong about the TP?

My TALL husband informed me that he cannot reach the paper, when hung down the back. In respect to him, I even fold the end into a point.

The instructions that came with our dishwasher said to mix the utensils. Some should be up, some should be down. Also, types should be mixed. That way, they can’t “nest” with each other, which would impair cleaning. But, some with pointy handles have to be placed handles up, because the pointy handles fit through the holes in the basket.

Another good one is when to change the towels…

How about: Whoever replaces the roll has the right to decide.

Toni says, “I always scrape. You don’t scrape?” and then Brad says “Never,” and immediately starts talking about toilet paper!!!

" Creates the illusion of having more space…"Thank you! I always do it that way because having the tail in front contributes to my claustrophobia. When people tell me I’m crazy I say, “Of course I’m crazy, I’m claustrophobic.”

We have all these differences in my house. We solve it by each doing it our own way. Whoever does the chore gets to choose how it’s done.

I once accused my wife of always thinking she was right about how to go about doing things. In all seriousness, she emphatically denied it, but said it’s just that there are two ways of doing things— her way, and the wrong way.

I’m with Toni, all around (except maybe I fudge a bit on the forks thing). She is clearly the better housekeeper by a wide margin. “My way” is best, as Brad will learn….

[actual meal omitted for clarity]…[indigestion caused by meal of prompts heated debate]…[kiss ‘n’ make up tomorrow]

“Happy Wife, Happy Life”. Repeat that mantra, Brad, till the wisdom of doing things her way becomes clear to you.

At least they aren’t sweating the big stuff, like wipe the dishes or let them dry.(I really can’t see the point in wiping, just makes them dirty again.)

“Yes, Dear”

The two magic words for a happy marriage.

All I care about is that it gets done. You do have to at least scape the food off, not necessaily rinse. Don’t leave me without toilet paper, hang it how you want. I’ll just change it when I get in there.

I have found that scraping is generally optional with modern dishwashers. Rice is an exception to that. If you don’t remove every last grain of rice off the dishes, utensils and cookware before you place them in the dishwasher, you will regret it.

“MY Way” Huh Brad? (Hee Hee)

WELCOME to Pre-Domestic “BLISS”.

Don’t WORRY Son. You’ll get USED to it.

Say Brad? NOW that a Wonderful Meal has been CONSUMED, and You Love Birds are all “Chatty-Cathy” and All, are You Gonna Tell Toni about Diane?

Hey, I’m Just Askin’……,

Might as well get used to it brother….your way is no longer “the way” you will be doing things

power of the v

agree…over the back (if you have a pet cat) the cat won’t unroll the roll playing.

I guess I’m “50-50” with both. On one hand, I favor Toni in re: dishwasher utensil placement. Pointy ends down… Much safer, especially when attempting to retrieve them from the flatware bucket. Yes, I do “pre-scrape.”

OTOH, I’m an “over the front’er.” Much easier to find the “open sheet” when you “need to.” Also easier to tear off without an “uncontrolled unrolling.” I’ve learned to be a over the fronter with paper towels, as well.

my toilet paper goes down the back… stupid stuff won’t let my get more than two sheets when it’s over the front.

and is harder to get leading to bigger waste of paper. (i hope they didn’t argue this at the Iran Nuclear talks)

Great comments today! We took out the dishwasher and wash dishes by hand because they get much cleaner. They dry pointed up in a rack in the adjacent basin. TP hangs over the front for utility over aesthetics. My wife and I agree on most things…she gives in to many of my preferences and I ALWAYS give in when she really cares about something.

Small stuff. Really, really small stuff.

Your grace period has expired. Now quit it.

This engagements over

My way or the highway!

Ah, the burnin’ issuesYou KNOW how they’ll resolve, Brad

I got in the habit of over the front when there was patterned toilet paper. If it hung down the back, you didn’t see the design.

Before marriage: “My way?”Third year of marriage: “My way.”Tenth year: “MY way!”

careful Brad……

I’m with Toni – toilet paper definitely over the back. Creates the illusion of having more space…^^Except, that when you get about 1/2 way, it tends to unroll itself if you do it that way.

These people really don’t know each other very well. This will be a very turbulent engagement.

Saw this I a T-Shirt the other day: " Marriage is like a deck of cards. First, you start out with 2 hearts and a diamond, but in the end you’re looking for a club and a spade"

My husband and I solved this years ago—we have separate bathrooms. His paper is over the front, mine over the back. Plus I don’t have to worry about leaving my cosmetics on the counter.

Only godless savages hang the TP down the back.

Brad strikes me as more nearly the sort of guy who just leaves the roll up standing up on the floor.

And women with fingernails end up scraping and discoloring the wall… very disgusting

I used to be an over-the-back person; more recently, I decided that it can go either way, based on the location and elevation of the roll. Some work better one way, others, the reverse.

Yes, now Brad is learning the truth, your wife is always right!@!! (lol)

health dept do not have a clue about about the real world so please don’t use them as some one that knows anything. They have kids that can barley read make these rules. My Dad lived to be 95 and never died from a fork being on the wrong end get a clue and try living for a change life is a risk enjoy it.

Toni, May I make a personal suggestion? If you always do things your way, taking care of the home work (cooking, laundry, cleaning, changing diapers), will always be YOUR job.*On the other hand, if you let him hand the toilet paper the correct way, you can always use that as leverage when getting him to clean & do laundry. (He obviuosly can’t yet be trusted to put a meal together.)

There it is!I said so yesterday and I’ll say it again:This is where SHE takes over!

Just wait until they start discussing sex and money!

Does this mean Brad’s the type who puts knives in the dishwasher basket blade up? I hate those people! Every time I clean out the dishwasher after they’ve been in it, I nearly stab myself! Their reaction? To chuckle and say I should be more careful! Next time, I’m gonna chase ’em around with one of those knives, yelling that they should have been more careful and not said that to me.

I wonder if anyone will make it this far down the comments.

Over the front is more sanitary. No other consideration need be made. This is also why you should always put the lid down before flushing (the toilet sprays water droplets into the air when you flush, and these mostly land in the area 3-5 feet from the toilet).

Everyone at some time has had the toilet paper argument. I needed extra ammunition, so I checked the internet some time ago. It turns out that:1. Hanging over the back means that someone (after wiping their ass) reaches behind the roll, usually touching the wall with their (possibly disgusting) fingers. That makes me want to puke when thinking about crusty feces and finger nail polish on the wall near the roll.2. The entire hospitality industry hangs it over the front. I have never been to a hotel that hangs it over the back. Who would doubt the “professionals”.3. It is easier to control the unrolling and locate the tear-off perforations over the front.The only reason I would concede to roll it under the back is if you have a pet that likes to unwind the roll.

Who really cares how the toilet paper is hung as long as you have paper to wipe your butt with!?!

No substance? Irrelevant.

If you have cats who like to shred it, do it her way. Otherwise, over the front makes the most sense.

A high tolerance level is the way to a good marriage. For both sexes.

A high tolerance level is the way to a good marriage. For both sexes.

Every hotel I have ever been in puts toilet paper over the front. Easier to find the end and to tear off where you want.

Something all men need to learn…

Speaking in favor of all the single girls here, I’m an over-the-top girl, I hand-wash dishes (and lingerie) and fold towels in thirds lengthwise (they stack better). Change the dishtowel Monday-Wednesday-Friday and handle my own finances, thank-you-very-much.

Toni, start him off with something simple like laundry, which he’s probably already been doing. Ease him into doing pleats (which are evil!) and other housework while you take care of the fun stuff like gardening.

However, I don’t have a cat (I’m extremely allergic) and am a geek gurl, so I’ll continue cooking – I love my crock-pot!

You’ll get him properly broken-in, Toni. All men are fixer-uppers!

It’s not the specific details that are shown today that’s important – it’s the overall pattern, namely that these 2 people really don’t know each other well. Toni was asking Brad what sorts of food he eats, which is something a genuine couple should know by now if they are planning a wedding. But we have seen that their ignorance of each other extends to the really major aspects of life, when we saw that they have very different daydreams of what their married life together would be. Brad wants to get married because he sees no other chance of ever achieving romantic and physical intimacy, and Toni wants to get married to have a companion to help her forget Dirk. They really just don’t understand each other, and therein lies disaster. The dishwasher and toilet paper incidents show how little effort they have expended in becoming a true couple rather than two people with their own agenda.

I do all three Brad’s way, and I am female.

Worst foreplay ever! Will you kids just shut up and do it already?

Brad is right….forks are better left up in the dishwasher.

Who cares which way toilet paper rolls? It will roll either way. Pick your battles. Fork and cutting knives down – I always rinse and wipe dishes before loading in the dishwasher. Most dishwasher don’t scrape off all of the food unless it is a commercial grade built for restaurants.

Please find another hobby (or a different strip).

Why bother? You never say anything — at least not in your “1st” posts….

Thanksgiving’s over now, so won’t the DeGroots be back home on Monday? If so, then Brad has just one more day to make his move (since the Sunday strip will be outside of the daily continuity). However, tomorrow will be devoted not to romance but to debating about whether to crack open a hard-boiled egg from the little end or the big end.

I agree with you. But some homes still have those ancient dishwashers that are really only for sanitizing. They can’t touch today’s excellent dishwashers.

I don’t think it’s worth scrapping the entire relationship though!

I can’’t wait for Luann to visit Stanford and ask an Admissions officer how the school stacks up against Pitt CC.

I have solved the over the front / over the back problem once and for all. I am ordering three of these commercial electric toilet paper dispensers – one for each bathroom.

The “Paper Towel” versions have been around for quite some time. Still, the problem is the same with both… never enough paper dispensed to get the job done! These are also used for “economy/accounting reasons…” (i.e. to control the amt. of paper consumed in an effort to save costs).

I have, however, figured out how to trick the electric eye into dispensing 2-3 times before ripping off the sheet. It takes just the “right touch.” I mean, I’d be using the same amt. of paper either way… individual sheets or one continuous sheet. I’d rather have the continuous sheet and fold it up/over.

;-)

It’s no trouble at all :3

I have solved the over the front / over the back problem once and for all.

So have I. The solution is so obvious I wonder how come a couple of dozen people have not spotted it. All Brad has to do is dump Toni.

Nice try, Levi. Not takin’ the bait, today. :)

And it was @Brdshtt’s quote, not mine. Just FTR. :)

I thought of that, as the house we lived in in Spain has bidets in both bathrooms. The main trouble is, you would have to switch bowls for each operation – and you would still have the wiping/drying problem. Plus, nobody likes finding poop in the bidet in case someone decides to take a shortcut.

Japan to the rescue: Toto Toilet with Washlet

I saw these on my trips to Japan. As it turns out, the use of “paper” for this vital activity is not traditional in most of Asia. You’re more likely to find a “bucket of water and scoop” in many “public” facilities, as did I on several occasions.

One side effect, though – The washlet can be rather “powerful” (from a “current/flow” context), and can result in some undesired “soreness” in the most critical places, if not properly acclimated to it.

Always scrape; Always over the front; forks go in points up or down, it doesn’t matter since you scraped first anyway. NO cutlery in the dishwasher, they get done in the sink all the way, but NOT in a filled sink (that can lead to major cuts from searching underwater for a lost blade)!And put the damn seat DOWN afterward, Brad! I do…

It would be nice if you could program it to dispense the amount of sheets you would desire. Even Sheryl Crow could set it for just one sheet. If the machine could also be programmed with a sense of humor, it could be programmed to give out a sinister little laugh if you program it to dispense two sheets or less

Better still, Robert Duval as “Col. Bull Meechum” in “The Great Santini.” :-PPP That poor corporal getting the swirlie of his life. ;-PPP

Two words Brad: “Yes, Dear.”

Just Go With It Boy.

Just so you know, who wears the hot pants in the familyAlong with the apron, well, we know it’s me

So jump back in line, and I’ll tell you whyAnd don’t sneak around with that two plyAnd while you’re there, pick up some daintiesYes, that’s what I’ve said, and I’ve said what I please…

Cos,you’ve got issue, with the tissue….And, that’s alright, by me, yeah…We’ll, I’ll be Charmunn, if you want love…I’ll be rough, if we disagree…

“And, if you take advantage of our 2-for-1 sale, you’ll be pulling Double Doody!” ^But then they’d treat it like “black Friday” (people really do, when it comes to TP sales, at any time), they’d wipe out the inventory!…

Health Dept food handler training says Forks and spoons up and knives down. Brad’s ‘compliant.’

“Issue With The Tissue” – Well, who is the one that runs for all hoursOh, yeah? Who is the one in this coming out like a flower?

Don’t make me turn this into a family meetingWith dishwater cold, and no warm supper for greetingIt won’t go over well, when you skip to my looAnd that’s why there’s a his and her’s, too!….

Cos we’ve got issues with the tissue, But it’s alright, by me…Cos it’s a Frankie tune (Sinatra), when you want love…It’s a headache tonight, if you disagree….

Just so you know, who wears the hot pants in the familyAlong with the apron, well, we know it’s me

So jump back in line, and I’ll tell you whyAnd don’t sneak around with that two plyAnd while you’re there, pick up some daintiesYes, that’s what I’ve said, and I’ve said what I please…

You’ve got issue, with the tissue….And, that’s alright, by me, yeah…We’ll, I’ll be Charmin, if you want love…I’ll be rough, if we disagree…

Over and over, I’ll tell you it’s going underYou say where you’ve learned it, and I’ll say it’s no wonder

Now don’t be late, while you’re out in the night airMaybe you better pick up a Tombstone, while you’re shopping, thereSo, it’s heads if I win, and tails if you loseSo cute when you make sense, but you’ll be singing the blues

There’s issue with tissue, yeah…Well, it’s alright, by me….Get the Charmin if you want loveBut forget, and you will see….

That’s probably what the store management would like to call the sales… but… you know… – Would also be fitting if it would happen on a hot summer’s day, while the neighborhood had a brown-out….

Ha ha ha!

Definitely.

I do all like Brad. Toni, who I love, is bugging me now.

I noted the Washlet has a ‘massage’ feature – I wouldn’t want everyone sitting there all day… :)

A quick glance at the brochure indicates that this feature is not intended for the “Eastern Frontier” (insufficient trajectory). Strictly a “Southwestern” thing, but delivering a “Water Pik” like experience…

Unless, of course, one sits in the “opposite direction.” ;-PPP

Don’t forget!! Opposites attract!

here is the hottest toy on “Black Friday”, the “Despair Bears”, and here is the mascot for Struggle Fabric Softener…

$1.99

And to also round out the comments number, to borrow a phrase, “Shave and a haircut….two bucks! (due to inflation…)”

One thing we forgot…. the dilemma when it’s the end of the roll.. do you use the last bit, or just replace it outright? Pertinent issues of the day!!! Lol!…

Seeing this strip and skimming through today’s Comments, brings me to a post-Thanksgiving thank: I am thankful that I never married!!!!

My wife used to be over the top with the TP, as I am; but for some reason she can’t explain, she started putting it over the back about five months ago. Well, we don’t have a cat, which is the only reason I can see for over the back; so I keep reinstalling the rolls after she puts them in. And it turns out that my DW manual and my wife both agree with Brad; so I now put my forks in points up, except for some lovely place settings I got off a Lufthansa flight: The handles are so narrow that they’ll fall through the basket; so they have to go in points down.

Over the top is technically correct. You can tell because if there are pictures on your paper towels, that is how the go the right way up. I’m still more comfortable if it hangs in the back.

First and lovin’ it!!!!

If you can’t remember, you’d be branded for life…

I was going to mention the “Ciallis” commercials earlier… Jay Leno showed an ad for a bathroom with a double toilet, and mentioned the commercial with two people holding hands… I’m so glad that that’s not an experience that people like to share together!…

If you were serious about not remembering the song, it was from the TV series “Branded”, with Chuck Connors who starred as Jason McCord. – Here is where the lyrics are cited, in this /Wiki article….

They are DOOMED!! An Over the front should NEVER marry an Out the back! They are evil!!

Reminds me of a little ditty I haven’t heard since probably the 1970’s:

Ah, you don’t remember your "Chuck Connor’s TV Series – "

Branded

“My way”. Had a relationship like that. My way or the highway was her motto.

It was a long and lonesome road.

Hey, that’s good to know!Actually, I usually only have arguments about wiping with other guys, like in our office kitchen.I always suggest they drink from the washcloth, and when they look repulsed, I say “please don’t wipe it over my clean glass then.”