Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 29, 2019

I’d say he found the light at the end of the tunnel

We are about to witness the world’s most serious mic drop.

He was looking for brains and found….

Will the microphone pick up the sound of the train whistle? Is he trying to hurt the ears of his YouTube fans?

That’s one way to run someone out of town on a rail.

Steve is about to learn the hardest lesson of all : you’ll never get anywhere in show business without the proper training.

“When I asked for stage track-lights, I didn’t mean….”

“Rail, rail against the Darkness”

At least his career’s back on track.

They ran him out of town on a rail.

Pardon me, Steve. Is that….?

It’s my tuxedo, that is why you put me on the rails.

It’s where a certain candidate now finds himself.

“Thank you and good night. I won’t be here all week….”

“And here’s a song you might remember, Chattanooga Choo-Choo…”

According to that award-winning bastion of journalism, The Onion, this is a national issue.

https://www.theonion.com/report-trying-to-hug-oncoming-train-still-leading-caus-1835726875

“blood on the tracks, blood in the mine, brothers and sisters what a terrible time, Old 97 went in the wrong hole…”

Anywhere from one to fifteen minutes, steve . . . that’s all ya get.

Q. What is the wrong side of the tracks? A. Between the rails.

I hear the train a comin’It’s rollin’ ’round the bend

When I hear that whistle blowin’I hang my head and cry.

Open mic night’s a big hit there.

He thought he was on the right track.

I’ve never seen railroad ties with those proportions. Likewise with the width/height proportion of the rails.

Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel Is just a freight train coming your way

Leon Russell ;)

“Swans sing before they die, ’twere no bad thingShould some men die before they sing!”

Steve’s rendition of “Freight Train Blues” left a lot to be desired.

There is a T-shirt that reads: ‘The light at the end of the tunnel – might be an oncoming train.’ I bought it in Altoona.

For Deadheads out there: “I wish I was a headlight, on a North bound train.”

Not to be picky, but….shouldn’t the shape of the spotlight, as it strikes the ground, be more elliptical?

How tragic. Others have gone down that track.

Soon to lose his train of thought too

Location, location, location!

He would be well known after that from the notorious censored video of him getting smashed by the train.

Announcer: Tonight at the Live or Die Comedy Club

He should have been suspicious when he was booked into a Comedy Tunnel …

My experience is that the bright lights are often precursors to serious unpleasantness. Of course, given my head, I usually take off in a direction that nobody expected — sometimes a direction that’s not exactly promoted… or even allowed.

If Steve is in the United States he may have only the crowd to fear.