Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 21, 2019

Us non-cyclist like having our…

Tomorrow is the neighborhood block barbecue, when the Crocs will cook up a lot of meat after dousing the charcoal with a full bottle of lighter fluid.

Don’t you just LOVE fitness fanatics who take great pleasure in putting the rest of us down? :/

I exercise regularly, including cycling. But if you answer Yes to ‘Do you wake up early to exercise?’, I would ask if you see a psychiatrist about that.

Cyclists are losers in my book. They only rate a midget lane on the very edge of the road.

Nothing like the “Loaded” survey questions ! ……. Croc Power !

Must be a WaPo-Newsweek Survey!

When I’m cycling I dislike drivers and pedestrians. When I’m driving I dislike cyclists and pedestrians. When I’m walking, I dislike everyone.

Everyone walks to the beat of their own drum…before trying to understand PIG, try to understand yourself!

Love Jef the Cyclist character and his arrogant smugness.

Ja, Pig ist just a little girly pig!

Getting up early is the key to exercise. Have a coffee, then do your thing (whatever it is). And guess what? You have the whole day left without having to tell yourself that you still need to hit the gym (or do whatever). As a figure skater, I used to skate at 5:30am when I had to be at work by 8. Now retired, I skate at 7am. It feels like noon. LOL.

Didn’t know Jef had a life partner

Cycling causes ED. Cyclists are, therefore, naught to be admired. In fact, they are rather amusing – their bravado covering their inability to…you know…do actual manly stuff.

https://www.healthline.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/can-cycling-cause-ed

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/biking-and-sex-avoid-the-vicious-cycle-201209145290

It’s worse when it’s your doctor.

If I answered the first question NO, did I pass?

You GO, Jef! Cyclists of the world, UNITE!

read a survey a few weeks back about the environment and ideas to make it better. After reading a few questions that made me think “what the heck does that have to do with clean air” I decided the entire thing was a waste of time.

Most of the avid bicyclists I know aren’t quite that bad, although a few are close.

The bike guys arrived before the censor guy.

Pig. Jef is right and you know it. GO JEF!

There’s that word in the comics again. If Stephen can say that, then I can say this joke: One day a nurse tried to give a man an enema, and he refused. She tried again, and again he refused. She said, “That does it. He will not be de-turd.”

Apparently, supreme smugness is a side effect of cycling.

Even Hell’s Angels are scared of these guys.

Please don’t use the t-word in your comic strip. It offends Pig and is too close to Presidential language.

The percentage of “cyclists” I see observing the traffic laws can be counted on one finger, and if you subtract me, they can be counted on, well, wouldn’t even need one finger!

Kind of reminds me of a survey sent around by an environmental group. Questions like, “Are you in favor of the continued rape of the environment by (whatever)?” Even as I agree with much of their agenda, such stupid questions turned me completely off to that particular group.

Shouldn’t the 2nd to last panel be yes/no? "Do you like being…. "

There are people who just like to ride bicycles. They’re not nearly as funny.

It doesn’t take a cyclist to come up with that survey, just an observer of human (er, pig) behavior.

I live out in the country, where is rains buckets and snow fall up to your eyes. Out here deer in the headlights is real. Always dream of seeing a 620 Deere with a couple of those guys hung up in a 40’ header.

On behalf of fat, lazy turds: I’m offended.

Are cyclists really as obnoxious as Pastis portrays them?

Mutual non-comprehension is okay. Mutual destruction, not so much.

Hmmm, I have to remember to send a copy of that survey to all they cyclists currently recovering from heat stroke developed while I road around in my air conditioned gasoline powered car…..

Hasn’t anyone run over Jef the Cyclist yet?!

Survey says: Yes, no, no, no, no, no.

Stick it in your spandex tights, Jef!

“And this is why the cyclists will be first against the wall when the revolution came”