Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for September 10, 2019

Umm, God, wouldn’t it be easier if you just converted this into a star gate and everybody just walks through?

Just sayin’…

Save it for St. Louis.

How many can fit on the arch. Is that Paulie?

“Noah, how long can you tread water?”

I remember talking to my scripture class – “What’s an ark?” and someone said “It’s a great big curve …” No, ark not arc – it’s a container, nothing more, nothing less. I love the cats.

Just paint it yellow

Hokay, if Noah was in France, he’d have built the Arche de Triomphe. America, it’d’ve been Golden Arches. Japan, shaped like a torii gate. Canada, an inukshuk. (Work with me people…)

And the Wiley animals win hands down. You’ve been replaced God.

This is what happens when you trust a 600-year-old man to hear your instructions.

That’s where it all went south, he brought two Wiley Bears along.

I guess arc welding hadn’t been invented yet.

Everyone interprets differently…..lol

YAY!!!! Wiley Bears!! YAY!!!!

Noah gets an idea for a fast way to deal with all that spare meat.

The Almighty: “And you better pick up the pace. You have less than a month before I reboot this world”.

NOAH: “Just reminding you about the rainbow at the other end of this story.”

As someone who has worked on both sides of specifying requirements for programmers, I like this one.

I wrote a payroll program for my wife’s business. Then I saw her run it and then she got out the adding machine and started totaling the numbers. I told her, “You know I can get the computer to do that for you.” I was literally in bed with my customer and I still missed a requirement.

41 days and counting

Darn spellcheck.

I prefer the version with four elephants balancing the flat world standing on the back of the giant turtle A’tuin swimming through space.

I only see one monkey, and he’s on lookout, must be some monkey business going on.

Zhoo-bah. Zhoo-bah. Zhoo-bah. Ding!

Wiley on vacation? The is a rerun of an old one. Still good.

All orders and requests must be detailed and written. No verbal orders or requests will be accepted.

It’s not 300 cubits long, for one thing.

I keep saying… spelling counts.

Non Sequitur is available in strip and panel format. When the Seattle PI discovered this, they switched to panel and shrunk it to the size of a postage stamp. Normally single panel strips have extra stuff off to the sides to cut to turn it into a tall panel, but I wonder for this panel if you can see the giraffes.

" O.K. God, just one question… What the hell’s a cubit ? "

Seams as plausible as the myth of Noah and the ark. The ark wouldn’t have been big enough for all of the insects and spiders, let alone the other animals.

I still like the old Bill Cosby comedy bit on one of his comedy records about conversations between God and Noah. Still funny after all these years

Noah probably was not clear about the whole cubit thing?

Noah’s response: “There you go with the homonyms…”

.

But I don’t know if it was it the same in that ancient language?

That’s the first rib of the ark, he’s building it upside down.

Noah, a good man but dumb as dirt.

Why does God talk in riddles? He/She is God after all.

Communications between Engineers and Developers has not improved.

With Wiley Bears, all those animals are just snacks!

Its not a soft “ch.” It’s a “k.”

Who’s going to fix the DHD?

Unfortunately, I hired a handyman like him a while back.

Should have sent an arkangel instead of an archangel.

Imagine if God had a New Englandah accent… Noah might have heard “Builld an Awk”…

I guess that would have made him an Awkwright… instead of an Arkwright… or Arcwright in this case.

And with the Awk in his care, he might be Awkward…

I still wanna know how he found two polar bears in the mideast.

Well, it IS an arc!

Given the extraordinary wealth of carpentry details in the original story, it’s hard to imagine anyone getting it wrong….

And why does everyone show a ship being built rather then the box or chest YHWH so clearly describes? In the Mesopotamian Gilgamesh story the Noah tale was copied from, the god Enki or Ea tells Utnapishtim to build giant box or cube to be called Preserver of Life. It was 200 feet in length, width and height, with a floor-space of one acre.

YHWH tells Noah:

“Make yourself an ark of gopherwood; make rooms in the ark [in Biblical Hebrew box, case, chest, crate], and cover it inside and outside with pitch. And this is how you shall make it: The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, its width fifty cubits, and its height thirty cubits." — Genesis 6:14-15

And what the hell is gopherwood, anyway? :-)

v√VVOOPahhh…v√VVOOPahhh…v√VVOOPahhh…

Noah tried to Cheat on the Construction Budget.

No wonder there wasn’t room for the Unicorns & Dinosaurs.

Noah’s arch TBH sounds more believable IMHO

Oh. I thought that it was Noah’s Stargate.

Notice – only one monkey.

One of my favorites ever. I still have it cut out from the newspaper from 2015.

Isn’t communication telepathic?