Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 20, 2020

Two legs plus four legs… yep, the two dogs had six feet!

Her special attack command to her dog “Six Feet”

Ten inches? I would’ve gone with eleven and eleventh-twelfths.

I went out of quarantine for the first time last week and went to the electronics store. I approached the staff member to ask a question and he started walking backwards away from me. Naturally I started following him but he had to point out we have to stay 6 feet away.

Anywhere but this country it would be 2 metres, at least.

Where is HER mask????

Is that a finger or a gun Pastis? Couldn’t really blame her if it was the latter…

What, no masks? AIEEEEEE…!

Wow, she’s a good judge of distance. I bet nobody can fool her by saying that the length from the last joint to the tip of their pinky is 6 inches.

I was 5 feet 11 & 15/16 of an inch away and yeah still got screamed that I’m in her 6 foot space.. and then she pull out a measuring tape. Tells me not to move. Marks the ground where she was and walked up to me and while she’s measuring from where she was to where I was and said see 5 feet 11 & 15/16 inches you are in my space… and I replied… no maam…you are now in my 6 foot spot.

She stormed off…

Six feet or six feet under.

6 feet? That’s nothing! On the other side of the ocean, we keep 2 meters.

But seriously, was she not wearing a mask? If she’s not wearing a mask, she’s expecting everyone to actively protect her safety but herself.

No masks? Then, perhaps she WAS wearing a mask (full head)! Homely, Babe!

I like 2 meters myself. One for gas, one for electricity.

I love those angry facial expressions he draws

She complained even more loudly when i explained I only have 2 feet and I need them to walk around on. I suggested she try a butcher shop if she wanted 6 feet that badly.

Picky, picky, picky…..

I’d stay away from her – even six feet seems too close!

Rat is not observing social distancing.

Some people have been yelled at for wearing mask and then being told the whole thing is a hoax. You gotta love idiots…Not!

How do we know she wants him to move because of Covid-19 and not because of him?

That’s odd. I only have two feet.

♫ No mask on your face, You big disgrace, Spreading your germs all over the place ♫

Yep stay six feet apart . Now you must yell at each other and throw out more spit ;-) … Croc Power !

Oh come on, Pastis, I’m sure you’ve had restraining orders for greater distances than that! ;)

MARKOV SAYS make it 5”11.

As for me, I use my LASER range scope off of my rifle. At first I left it on, but people misunderstood. It worked better that way, however.

Once again I’ll state that a lot of women measure 6’ social distancing exactly like a lot of men measure 6". Get outta my face you no mask wearin’ Flu Klux Klanners!

Oy! There’s ways to assert yourself and that’s not one of them.

I was walking to the beach, had my mask on, beaches in NE Florida are crowded. Two young white HS age boys walked by and changed at me, “coronavirus, coronavirus”. I chanted “asshole” back at them. I am 72 and I hate Donald Trump. Dr. Fauci did not pay me or approve this announcement:).

“Six feet” is an arbitrary standard, and an ineffective one in any case.

FFS, if we’re all going to become Monk, at least try to develop a level of intellect rather than merely adding another layer of pointless habit.

This has been a crummy year.

Neither is wearing a mask, so dont bother lecturing each other. The dog is the intelligent one here

She had her dog on a leash, thus avoiding having her life threatened by a Greek guy.

Next we will have the “Personal Space Police” patrolling the sidewalks. We already have them in our local grocery store—telling you that you are going up the down lane, and they actually have a security guard in front to throw you out if you are not wearing a mask. Needless to say I shop elsewhere now. There is such a thing as carrying things too far. Please feel free to attack me.

Already got plenty of self-appointed “Personal Space Police”, as illustrated.

Yep. Another part of the randomness. 6 ft, not 5"11.999.

Use a 6 ft leash issue solved.

Form the dog!!! You were too close to the dog :D

People not wearing mask’s don’t get to yell “Six feet, please!”

Like pulling up to a mini-mart, and putting on a mask before entering — is expected now.

No masks?

I can guess her name

6 feet AND masks. It is not one or the other.

Disappointed. Wear a mask Pastis!

=> MASK!

Yawn Can we return to humor soon?

Well, this is one way to control the population explosion, a Darwinian Filter and no new couples.

Idiot

OK, lady… back up.

118,000 + people dead.Not a hoax.

Two feet plus four feet: six feet.

I would think with Pastis, that would be a normal reaction even without a pandemic.

Six feet at the grocery store, they still get up on your butt in line it is a pet peeve with me even b/4 COVID-19.

The woman actually did not have a nose?

Speak softly, but carry a 6 foot stick.

When Pastis draws himself, he looks a lot worse than when Pastis draws himself drawing himself. There’s probably something there, but I skipped psychology class.

People stayed six feet away from me even before the virus.

No masks? Where do you live? New York?

I “liked” this, but it also made me very sad. One of my greatest joys up until March was asking if I could say hello to peoples dogs. I did not ask to pet them, but just to say hello. Before the six-foot rule some guy looked me up and down and said “no.”

Pandemics are no excuse for bad manners.

Awww, poor Stephen!!! It’s happened to me.:(

She meant, “six feet under, please!”.

What is the magic of a mere six feet ?/ Expand the distance ! Let’s be more discrete !/ Why not ten feet or more..sixteen !/ Or sixty even !/ Let the space between/our persons , in these, O, so parlous times/ be what the tropics are to arctic climes/ a matter not of feet, but of degrees / of latitude ! Some sixty miles are these/ sufficient isolation, if you please/ to live untroubled by a distant sneeze/ safe from that microbe sailing on the breeze….

Yes, people are rude af and using the current circumstances to be even ruder. When people do stuff like that to me, I rude them right back with a “BAAAAAAAAA”. And go on my way.

Where were you? Here in SC you are lucky to get 6 inches…and no one is using PPE.

Let’s all yell at Cartoon-Boy! It can be the new version of the pandemic “balcony serenade” of the day!

Perhaps @ 5’11", she mighta graced you with an judgement call.

my dog’s leash is 6 ft long. My gal-dog is a good distance enforcer. Barkitty bark bark.

I think that is a rat on a leash, not a dog. And if that rat/dog hadn’t moved 2 inches closer to Steven, it was 6 feet!!

Never mind that! If you sneezed, everyone looked at you as if you were a terrorist!