Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 09, 2022

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    BE THIS GUY  almost 2 years ago

    I believe, Pig has found his calling.

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    BasilBruce  almost 2 years ago

    Chocolate and cheese? Heaven is in Switzerland?

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    ronaldspence  almost 2 years ago

    “Works righteousness”

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    Wilde Bill  almost 2 years ago

    ♪ Heaven is a place / A place where nothing ever happens ♪

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    eromlig  almost 2 years ago

    What, no doggie treats? Who else is more deserving of Heaven??

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    Erse IS better  almost 2 years ago

    AND your pants don’t shrink… if you have pants of course.

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    Alexander the Good Enough  almost 2 years ago

    I should think that a proper Pig’s heaven would be to be the featured attraction at Christmas dinner…

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    The dude from FL  Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    PIG, you didn’t mention as much bacon as you can eat with no calories

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    DennisinSeattle  almost 2 years ago

    Rat, I think you have some purgatory dues to pay.

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    Jacob Mattingly   almost 2 years ago

    … honestly that sounds like what heaven should be… and at least part of what it should include.

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    _lounger_  almost 2 years ago

    very effective gentle persuasion

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    Doug K  almost 2 years ago

    Blessed are the gentle and meek.

    Blessed are the the innocent and those who are pure in heart.

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    DanielRyanMulligan1  almost 2 years ago

    Remember, (IN 1991(nineteen ninty-one(after “jesus christ” died) AD, BEFORE the “new” millennium), in pre-pixar times, the “STAR” of finding Nemo AND finding dory, it’s underappreciated “sequel,” a writer/director/actor/stand-up comedian named ALBERT BROOKS “made” his 4th(yes, fourth, what IS IT WITH ME and “sequels” of the “4th(fourth)” variety, anyway?!)feature film, much beloved, by the way, thanks to HBO, WITHOUT his “usual” writing partner/director/editor, etc., (think kevin Patrick Smith without his “right arm” in the form of “Scott mosier,” MR. BROOKS’S "usual partner’ was a woman named Monica johnson, a no-show for the MOST HERALDED, by “everybody,” FEATURE FILM NAMED “defending your life,” by, (all by himself, see?) a mr. Albert brooks, who, while addressing issues about the “afterlife,” made the SAME “points” as pig, in a film about “what REALLY happens to you after you die….” (seems like we’re ALL either a)READING from the “same source,” or b)tell the same “brilliant/corny” jokes!!!! Who knows? We ALL have the same GOD, right? Bye Dan aka…..

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    tonypezzano  almost 2 years ago

    Don’t you mean act good not be good?

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    iggyman  almost 2 years ago

    Even Rat is impressed on that one!

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    uniquename  almost 2 years ago

    Rat, do you have it in you?

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    Frank Salem Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    I like today’s strip a lot.

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    mrwiskers  almost 2 years ago

    I have always been amused, I guess is the right word, by how differently each man made religion describes heaven.

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    kaycstamper  almost 2 years ago

    Haha, pig dreams on…

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    Croc Holliday  almost 2 years ago

    Heaven is a place on earth, so says Belinda Carlisle.

    Warrant suggests that heaven isn’t too far away.

    Bryan Adams feels that as long as the love of his life is here in his arms, he’s in heaven

    Los Lonely Boys haven’t got there yet, and want to know how far heaven is

    Bruno Mars feels as though he’s been locked out of heaven

    Axl Rose is knockin’ on heaven’s door, unsure if he’ll be let in (yeah whatever to you Bob Dylan purists)

    Led Zeppelin is taking the stairway, so it may take them a while to get there

    Oddly, heaven appears to be on fire, according to KISS

    Wham! can be found at the edge of heaven

    The Cure thinks something or other is just like heaven

    Heaven may be small and can fit right beside you, per Alice in Chains

    Loverboy sees heaven in your eyes (man, those Canadians are so sentimental…….)

    Heaven is missing at least one angel, per Tavares

    Raise your hands to heaven, because Breathe told you to

    Phil Collins got sidetracked because something happened on the way to heaven

    If you see heaven, say hello from Temple of the Dog

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    Ellis97  almost 2 years ago

    Heaven is a place in the clouds for good people. I don’t think Rat has it in himself to be good.

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    Goat from PBS  almost 2 years ago

    I hate to break it to you, Pig, but good deeds do not guarantee a ticket in paradise.

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    Zebrastripes  almost 2 years ago

    Too late RAT! Your obnoxious behavior has already been etched in stone! ☺️☺️☺️

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    DrDavy2000  almost 2 years ago

    Actually, the ultimate destination of those who trust God is not heaven, but a renewed (perfected) earth, or, as CSNY said, “Back to the garden.” So don’t worry about that traditional image of getting bored strumming a harp in the clouds. That’s not what we’re destined for.

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    Bucinka  almost 2 years ago

    Count me in.

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    Tweet&Bleat  almost 2 years ago

    Are there bathrooms in heaven?

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    aerotica69  almost 2 years ago

    Can that cheese be turned into a cheesecake? If so, I’m in.

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    KEA  almost 2 years ago

    Heaven is one of the most unfortunate ideas ever invented by humans

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    raybarb44  almost 2 years ago

    Just be good for goodness sake, regardless of what the afterlife holds for us…..

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    hariseldon59  almost 2 years ago

    Be careful what you wish for. I’m reminded of the Twilight Zone episode where the crook died and ended up in the afterlife, where he was granted his every wish. However, he soon became bored that everything came too easy, and deciding that he didn’t belong in Heaven, begged to go to “the other place”, only to be told that this WAS the other place!

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    Geezer  almost 2 years ago

    https://quoteinvestigator.com/2011/07/19/heaven-for-climate/

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    Packratjohn Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    I’d like to the beverage menu before I make any rash lifestyle changes.

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    d edwin  almost 2 years ago

    Rat would prefer unlimited beer!!

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    gigagrouch  almost 2 years ago

    Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens.

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    The Orange Mailman  almost 2 years ago

    He must be Presbyterian.

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    NWdryad  almost 2 years ago

    Or become constipated, I suppose?

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    AZPhinFan  almost 2 years ago

    Psalm 37:29……enough said

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    Ray Helvy Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    If you include lactose tolerance for the milk chocolate and cheese, my whole family will want to be in on it.

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    sergioandrade Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    “Heaven for climate, Hell for company.” Mark Twain

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    rshive  almost 2 years ago

    Not the best justification, Rat. But give it a try. It may make the world better.

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    198.23.5.11  almost 2 years ago

    Angels eat?

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    knight1192a  almost 2 years ago

    Unless it’s combined with Norse mythology. Specifically Vahalla and slain warriors being taken to Vahalla. In thaat case, they’d die every single day, and come back to life to feast every night.

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    paullp Premium Member almost 2 years ago

    Before I’d agree to go, I want to know if the cheese and the chocolate are high quality (hey, this is eternity we’re talking about). If the cheese is individually wrapped slices of American cheese (aka, pasteurized process cheese food) and the chocolate is the cheap kind they use to make chocolate coins, I’ll pass!

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    asrialfeeple  almost 2 years ago

    Did they say anything about living well? It’s not always a good thing you can’t die.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  almost 2 years ago

    There’s more to being good enough for Heaven than having chocolate and cheese. Being good in this life is important on its own.

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    Cathy P.  almost 2 years ago

    When Mohammed died, he went to Paradise, where he met George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Robert E. Lee, and many other folk from the Old Dominion State. He complained to Allah, asking where were his 72 virgins. Allah replied, “Virgins? I said, ‘Virginians’”.The original joke was much longer, but I shortened it to the basics.

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    Sisyphos  almost 2 years ago

    Pig’s idea of “heaven” is very piggy, but cute. Just the sort of thing Rat would go for!

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    donut reply  almost 2 years ago

    I see Heaven as having no food, shelter, or money. You don’t need these things.

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    Walter the dog   3 months ago

    You can’t do good to go to heaven

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