Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 28, 2024

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    BE THIS GUY  6 months ago

    Learn to leave people alone.

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    BasilBruce  6 months ago

    Pig had it wrong anyway; you can’t choose to be happy or sad, any more than you can choose not to bleed if you’re wounded. It just doesn’t work that way.

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    hariseldon59  6 months ago

    I can relate to Rat here.

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    Cornelius Noodleman  6 months ago

    That’s gotta hurt.

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    juncarlo  6 months ago

    Not only does Rat keep himself miserable, he makes the people around him miserable. And that applies to many rude people.

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    blunebottle  6 months ago

    Pig’s mistake: giving him a choice.

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    3nemesis  6 months ago

    Well, the choice seems to have cured him anyway.

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    Gent  6 months ago

    Beaten pork for breakfast eh.

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    Bilan  6 months ago

    Today’s lesson for Pig: Non-morning people do not like cheerfulness in the morning.

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    Keno21  6 months ago

    I have a rule: Not only do I not make any decisions the first hour I am up, I will not ALLOW myself to make any, and absolve myself from any pressure. Makes getting up so much more manageable.

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    iggyman  6 months ago

    Life always presents challenges, how to respond to them is up to you!

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    _lounger_  6 months ago

    looks like Rat’s mood improved, though

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    Purple People Eater  6 months ago

    I have a question for those who say happiness is a choice…

    Suppose that, through no fault of your own, you lose your job, your spouse takes the kids and runs off with someone else, and, because you can’t make payments, since you don’t have a job, the bank forecloses on your mortgage, you lose your home, and your car is repossessed. To top it all off, your doctor tells you you have a brain tumor and at most six months to live. Would you still chose to be happy?

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    mrwiskers  6 months ago

    Why does pig always choose this route?

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    mrwiskers  6 months ago

    When I wake up, before leaving my bed, I lay there thinking of three things for which I am grateful. While ruminating, usually smiling, I sometimes doze back. Other times I get up feeling peaceful and calm.

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    Ignatz Premium Member 6 months ago

    In the older sense of the word, happiness IS connected to good things happening to you. That’s WHY the word is “happy.”

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    Ellis97  6 months ago

    Rat isn’t a morning person, a day person or a night person. In fact, he’s not even a person at all.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 6 months ago

    Esp in the morning. BTW… Our Be❤️ed Hero and God Bless America Patriot Extraordinaire, The Handsome ❤️Count is very much a Morning Person! And whole❤️edly channels Hobbes and Garfield with the nap stuff.

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    The Fly Hunter  6 months ago

    Don’t worry…. be happy.

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    [Anonymous Account]  6 months ago

    I’m not much of a morning person either. I force myself to get up so I can read Pearls Before Swine.

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    Goat from PBS  6 months ago

    Pig isn’t totally wrong. There can be joy in mourning, key phrase being “can be.”

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    Linguist  6 months ago

    I’m an early riser but don’t try to talk to me until I’ve had my first cup of caffeine!

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    ksu71  6 months ago

    ♫ Ya can’t roller skate in a buffalo herd ♫

    ♫ Ya can’t roller skate in a buffalo herd ♫

    ♫ Ya can’t roller skate in a buffalo herd ♫

    ♫ But you can be happy if you’ve a mind to ♫

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    l.vaillancourt  6 months ago

    I LOVE taunting non-morning people!

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    Norris66  6 months ago

    Morning has Broken over his head.

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    Cameron1988 Premium Member 6 months ago

    Pig had to learn the hard way once again

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    ladykat  6 months ago

    He wasn’t taunting you, he was trying to help.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  6 months ago

    No, just don’t someone in a bad mood. Most of the time, they just get worked out.

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    Katje  6 months ago

    We call this “Pork chops”. :)

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    RaulMartinez  6 months ago

    Happiness is a purchase.

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    ChessPirate  6 months ago

    (ಠ ͚ ͚ʖ ಠ)

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    AtariDragon  6 months ago

    “Happy” literally means “lucky”.

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    KageKat  6 months ago

    Toxic positivity is called that name for a reason!

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    zeexenon  6 months ago

    This long ago retired person gets up when HE feels like it. But, still, quickly takes his strong coffee fix habit.

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    Ermine Notyours  6 months ago

    “Turn that frown upside down! It takes more muscles to frown than to smile.”

    AAAGHHHHH! SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!

    In other news, I may have a job next week, so staying on a morning schedule has paid off.

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    Tortured Nate  6 months ago

    WHERE’S MY SUNDAY PUN??!! I NEED MY SUNDAY PUN.

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    Moriarty11 Premium Member 6 months ago

    You write a country-western song about it and come a millionaire

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    CleverHans Premium Member 6 months ago

    Since it is Sunday, I will point out that Solomon was apparently not a morning person.

    “If anyone loudly blesses their neighbor early in the morning, it will be taken as a curse.” Proverbs 27:14

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    DonCoyote®  6 months ago

    ….. Cue Bobby McFarren.

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    Mr Pets  6 months ago

    Speaking of the choice thing here’s a random fact: When websites give you a choice they sometimes make the “no” button sound horrible so that the people on the website will choose yes

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    wildlandwaters  6 months ago

    I knew a gal that couldn’t (or more accurately, wouldn’t!) be civil until her first cuppa joe in the AM. I always thought, “do you ever plan on growing up?” Unfortunately, some folks choose not to their whole lives. Fortunately for me in my situation, they’re easy to keep at arm’s length…(or farther, preferably! Lol!)

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    TIMH  6 months ago

    Don’t taunt Happy Fun Ball either.

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    willie_mctell  6 months ago

    Since happy and unhappy are actually triggered by electrochemical events not under conscious control, about the best you can do is try to behave in a manner that minimizes unhappy trigger events and try to find behavior that will minimize the electrochemical responses. It still won’t do much about your first born being hit by a car driven by bipolar guy off his meds and under the influence of meth and acid.

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    donnagant622 Premium Member 6 months ago

    I just lost my husband of 42 years, three days after he passed our water line and sewer line collapsed, and neither one covered by insurance, and no life insurance

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    eddi-TBH  6 months ago

    That attitude has made Garfield a fortune.

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    Aladar30 Premium Member 6 months ago

    Rat is quite right.

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    blindavocado Premium Member 6 months ago

    People are about as happy as they choose to be- Abraham Lincoln

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    blindavocado Premium Member 6 months ago

    Happiness is a serious problem - Dennis Prager

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    Komix Lover  6 months ago

    Ohhh yes, morning people are the worst in the morning. For some reason they think being cherry and talkative when you first wake up makes your day. Then they don’t understand why you can’t be just like them.

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    fourteenpeeves  6 months ago

    Eddie Lawrence will now do his famous routine—-“The Old Philosopher”

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