That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for April 18, 2024

My original post in 2020:

“I’m hired to do the gardening. I’m not going to chase after your cat.”

My original comment: Jed took the term “pitching woo” literally.

/// Zebadiah called up to Miss Pat,

“You’ve complained that my butt is too flat.

While you watch, I’ll do lots

of reshaping leg squats.”

She ignored him and stared at the cat.

I don’t have a boombox to hold above my head, will this pitchfork do?

Artist captures Mildred’s first interview resulting from the Scarecrow ad she placed on Craigslist.

He’s a good tine charlie kind of guy.

He’s better at pitching hay than his cause.

Petunia’s is what I want under the window sill, and, your fly is open.

But Mr. Greenjeans has such a wonderful PLAN for your life!

Well, since I got hired on to do some farming, I figured I’d sow some seeds. Wanna join me?

Elmer the rural, on-call exotic dancer answers his first call of the day

“I’m the schoolmarm, and I sez ya git yore butt right back in this classroom, y’hear?”

“Half an oaf is better than none !”/

Thought she, as he stood in the sun,/

“He’s a bit of a dork:/

Two tines short of a fork/

But two tines are better than one..”

Oh, git up here, ya big galoot!

And while you’re out, can you till the west field and pick up a gallon of milk.

Amber Lynn was a favourite. I liked Ginger Lynn as well. No relation.

Good essay at artvee dot com. Just do a Google search on the words, artvee winslow homer rustic courtship, and it should come up top or in the first few.

That’s not how the farmers up in Ohio and Michigan and Minnesota ever talked.

“Are ya carrying another pitchfork in yer pants, or are you just happy to see me?”

Try as he might, Oscar just couldn’t get anyone to buy his new extra-length butt-scratcher.

He kept calling her Rapunzel. She eventually closed the window.

You do know that’s her Mom at the window?

Whatever it takes to propagate the species.

No, Joshua, that is not a ladder.

“Pass me that hoe handle, Jed, there is a spider up in the corner of the ceiling I can’t reach with my broom.”

Rustic Courtship or In the Garden: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Rural culture in art" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, and Ecosia search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string Rustic, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly B4 paper size painting.

 Again, a larger strip image is shown by merely clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s THROWBACK THURSDAY: MASTERPIECE #2479 (6/26/20) (April 17, 2024) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment. I have added a comment there pointing the blog entry with my comment pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, 12 works by this artist have been used here (15 times total, including a Classic, this and another Throwback Thursday repeats), the July 26, 2020, strip being its first use. The March 30, 2023, strip has the prior by him (another repeat).

Ole Elmer here needs a trip to the Ophthalmologist if he is planning to hoe that row.

“Worms, Roxanne! I was afraid of worms!”

Da da, ta da ta, The chores; Da da, ta da ta, The Stores; Da da ta da ta, Fresh air; Da da ta da ta, Times Square……..

(Modeled upon “Make Hay While The Sun Shines")

Nellie, come on down this summer day.

You make me hot set on the sill that way,

Your eyes so blue ignite my soul to burning

My heartfelt love to you is yearning!

While the sun shines bright, let us make hay!

.

Let’s make hay while the sun shines, Nellie

Every time we meet, my legs turn to jelly.

We would hitched be so good together,

We ain’t gonna be so young forever

For you I feel the home-fire in my belly!

.

Our family haystack will without fails

Through the years lead to many bales

To continue generations in fruitful growth

And flourish in noble sexes both,

Female helpmates to prosperous males.

YOU WANT BEADES? show us your brest

Amber-Lynn: how come you hadda be a Hatfield, Romeo?

Some comments from the 6/26/20 post (part 1):

PICTO: “Wish me luck at the forking contest…”

Papared25: “Jethro, is that my best sun bonnet you got on? And that looks like my favorite red blouse! My sands, I’m beginning to think you might be one of them there transversal types!

Glibster: Tines a-wastin, done hesitatin’. Not to work is a sin, so “bye-bye” Amber-Lynn!

Call me Ishmael: Whilst he toils with his tool of two tines / for their glorious past she now pines / they remember the days / when they starred in school plays / with those deathless Shakespearean lines …

Call me Ishmael: The Shakespearean cri de Coeur / of the aged, rustic voyeur / through her window he peers / though she’s burdened by years / for by now, it’s become de rigueur..

gopher gofer: ‘woudja like to check out mah tool, mary beth…?’

P51Strega: …we can go fork and multiply.

*l3i7l: * Marybeth: “Fer shore! Bring that there tool of yours up here to the haymow n’ we kin commence forking.”

WoodstockJack: Romibo, oh Romibo! Wherefore ain’t you, Romibo?

Tell yo’ daddy to pound sand and get beant.

Or else, if’n y’all ain’t got the guts,

Bring a ladder and let’s skedaddle.

jbrobo: Homer? Can you practice herding cats somewhere else?

aerotica69: Now Jethro, don’t you go out rakin’ up any more cats – we got enough now to keep the house, the barn AND the back forty clear of mice.

Reader: Got yer cat down, but now I gotta pick out this wedgie I got meself.

rmremail: “On your way to the field, can you stop by the store and pick up a gallon of milk? And we’re all out of red paint. And if the avocados are on sales, get six. And….”

Bookworm: American Gothic – the blooper reel.

Blaidd Drwg: I got the pole. Wanna Dance?

Some comments from the 6/26/20 post (part 2):

Csaw Backnforth: When I asked for directions, they told me to take the fork in the road.

PO’ DAWG: “Mrs. Knight , have you seen ma peach basket?” “I gotta go practice ma free throws.”

Indianapolis Smith: No huggy, no kissy, until she gets a weddin’ vow.

HunterIsACriminal: “John.”

“Yes, Mildred?”

“Please button-up those pants!”

Linguist: Hiram might have been a couple of tines short of a full fork, but Heddy wasn’t exactly sweeping with all the bristles in her broom, either!

Linguist: Maid and the gardener plotting how she’ll poison the mistress and he’ll hide the body in the haystack until he can feed it to the hogs …

Radish the wordsmith: I got ma fork, you git yer torch and we will march to the castle.

MissScarlet: First, straighten the pedestal under the sword fern, catch the cat, mow the lawn and then I’ll think about going to the movies with you.

Jml58: When serenading your sweetheart, be sure you have the right house.

Running Buffalo: “Yes ma’am. I made that crop circle thingy like you asked me to.”

“Good! That should confuse them in 100 years or so!”

“Nearly done?” “Yep, some for the horses and the rest in the loft. What’s for dinner?”