Pickles by Brian Crane for August 19, 2021

I’ve followed Martha Stewart’s directions and I still can’t do it.

Folding them while on the clothes line is the only way I can get fitted sheets smooth. With rules in place against clothes lines, and just me now, it really doesn’t matter!

I think the Diet Pepsi will taste like a Diet Dr. Pepper, Earl, if Opal attempts that.

To get it that thin, it must be some kind of ultra thin microfiber.

She should start a religion….

I mentioned this awhile back but a woman I worked with started telling how to fold a fitted sheet and it ( what she said, not the sheet) went in one ear and out the other.

Folding fitted sheets is just not part of a man’s skill set.

Just say “NO” to fitted sheets !

I always buy un-fitted sheets and have no problem!!

I even marked the coners with a marker so I have no problem putting them on the bed, fitted sheets are hard for me!

Turning lead into gold would be a better trick.

I’ve never had a problem with this, at least not until I got a set of sheets in cotton jersey fabric. Those won’t slip and slide over each other like linen sheets, so if you start them aligned incorrectly, they stay that way or get worse as you continue to fold.

It may be significant that I was a candystriper in the summer of ’74, and they spent a lot of time training us in how to make a bed (even with the patient still in it).

They should ban fitted sheets.

Getting the duvet cover back on was my problem, until I googled how to do it.

The Lady does this, except I am certain she quickly mumbles secret words invoking otherworldly forces. Because I can’t ever do that.

Never have been able to stand the taste of Pepsi; diet or otherwise…

Take off your shoes and socks and sit on the floor. Fold your arms and legs and then grab each corner of the sheet with one hand and one foot respectively. Unfold your arms and legs and Voila! There you have it, a perfectly folded fitted sheet.

There should be about four more frames between the second and third frames. . .if ya know what I mean. . .

What a load of rubbish. Just roll it up in a ball. Now, the top sheet, that’s where the superior skills, and long arms, of Poppa Panda shine. Neat, smooth folds, every time. I have been well trained. Don’t overlook the pillow cases!

Gimme a jar of water and two hours and I can turn it into…well, don’t mind! No big trick at all

Hubby swears that either Brian has a spy in our house, or I’ve been sending in hints.

Consumer Reports has a video on how to fold a fitted sheet

I’m with Earl on this. I fold my laundry (yes, even my bedstuffs) and I can’t get my sheet to look even CLOSE like that. It’s such a rebel.

The trick to folding them is to throw in washer then dry, then put back on bed…see? Skipping the folding is less stress!

hate folding sheets and I avoid “diet” pop artificial sweeteners are worse for you then sugars. I use Stevia and drink pop called Zevia which uses Stevia

My wife solved this problem long ago. She takes the sheets off the bed. Washes them and then puts them back on. No folding. The spare set of sheets are in a drawer waiting for the day that she decides to dispose of the ones we use.

Fitted sheets were fine, and easy to fold. Then some smart alec decided that they needed elastic on all four sides. Most times I have to turn them around before I get them on right.

Take it out of the dryer and put it right back on the bed. No problemo amigo !

Really not hard, and do not have to fold perfect.

SO simple. A) Take your shears, B) Cut off the outside edge and all that annoying elastic, C) Fold the ragged ends in and under so they don’t show, D) Dress to receive your Nobel prize and, then ink your book deal.

One should never.. fold a fitted sheet. You use one at a time, wash it and put it back on the bed.. when it wears out or you need a change, throw it out and start with a new one. The “set” should include a top sheet that is fitted on one end.. would make making a bed a lot easier.

Fitted sheets don’t REQUIRE folding. They can be wadded into a basic quadrant and stuffed on a linen shelf, and be no worse for the wear.

Folding a fitted sheet is for the truly anal.

Fitted sheets are not meant to be squarely folded?

It’s easy.

No problem….let me get the soda stream®

My ex-wife could do that. So could my grandma, somehow it never passed down to me.

Earl can turn water into whine!

I got it. You fold both ruffled edges into the middle, not to each other. Then fold again and fold widths together. Figured this out just now, but I’ll bet it doesn’t look as smooth as Martha’s.

With the new beverage that mixes stuff so you can get whatever soda you want, its possible(I saw ads for that machine last year, have no idea if it was actually a product or just a gimmick)

My mom taught us that when we were little. Earl, you’re better off with water…diet sodas cause cancer, diabetes, cardiovascular issues, kidney problems, skin problems, depression, the list goes on and on!

I watched five different video instructions on YouTube and I still can’t do it. (gave up actually, ‘cuz I’ve no one to criticize my folding)

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet. It can be done, but it’s a lot of work, and it never comes out as neatly as you’d like.

Men are not genetically capable of figuring this out. Tried many times, gave up. Let the bed de-wrinkle it.

I believe you would add brown food coloring to the water, but I don’t know how you would get the bitter aftertaste.

I’ve tried to fold them for over forty years and still end up ranger rolling them.

I used to be able to fold them correctly about 30 years ago. I still do hospital corners though.

I don’t scrunch up a fitted sheet in quite the way Earl did yesterday, but I can’t possibly fold it with the precision that Opal displays. I fall somewhere in the middle.

I am curious, though (briefly ignoring the fact that they exist in a cartoon universe, where anything is possible): How many hours of her life did Opal waste in developing this amazing skill?

Now THIS is a funny comic!!!X’DDD That is not humanly possible!

The trick is to iron the sheet before making each fold. It only takes about half an hour. :)

I know how to do it.

Another DEMON! Fitted sheets are Satan’s way of having fun with us humans – so if a person can fold it like, as Opel did and my husband does, then they must be part Demon.

I can’t do that.. Nobody can, well maybe Martha.

I think folding a fitted sheet involves magic, and if you’re not a witch or a wizard you can’t do it.

I can do it, but just choose to reuse it once the laundry is done.

My ex-husband figured it out and showed me.

That IS a miracle. I end up with a neatly folded mess. Looks ok on the outside. Unwrinkled sheets are over rated.

We don’t fold ours. After my wife washes it, we put it back on the mattress.

LOL

One of the great mysteries of life,

Why even try??????