Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for November 25, 2023

He has one of two choices…. 1) take her along when he goes to the golf course or 2) spend more time with her at home. I bet she is hoping he will choose the second one.

Time to go back to the golf course or the corner bar. Can’t get any worse at home

Is there a Chili’s nearby or a Motel 6?

Can you crawl and grovel at the same time?

He stayed too long at the 19th hole.

Looks like a penalty drop for relief from an unplayable hazard.

Wrong house.

And kiss the carpet as you crawl forward, hoping she vacuumed recently.

“Everybody needs a little time away, from each other”, lyrics from Hard to Say I’m Sorry, by Chicago.

Best defense is a good offense; and he’s got a bag full of clubs.

“Oh, it’s lying time again she won’t believe me,” by Homer and Jethro.

Bob’s problems began at conception when he received that pesky Y Chromosome.

My favorite wife/golf joke.

Harry promises that he’ll be home by four pm. At 8 pm he comes through the door.

“Honey, before you say anything, I’m late because George died today.”

“My god! Sally’s husband George? What happened?”

“He had a heart attack and dropped dead on the way to the first tee. Dr. Fred was with us and he pronounced him dead at the scene.”

“Oh my God. That’s so awful! "

“Tell me about it. All day it was hit the ball and drag George, hit the ball and drag George…”

It’s this, or the ‘If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you’ treatment.

Is this golf fetish thing part of men’s aging process???

Bob, you´re already in trouble so go to a bar and get wasted, It won´t improve things but you won´t care!

Would be better if it was Andy Capp with a cherry red nose and Flo. Dilly! Dilly!

For some guys, it doesn’t take much to step over a line. Especially when there’s a new one every day. Knew a guy who, after several frustrating years of trying to avoid trespass, just decided wife needed some space. He moved. But, not surprisingly, that works for both genders.

My wife and I love each other very much. We fight, we do things that get on each others’ nerves and we’ve learned when blow them off (because they are transitory) or discuss them in non-accusing ways. I do not need to be told when I am in the dog house with her. I just know.

This is kind of the way I think about the afterlife, I’ll know where to go without having to be judged.

Ya think?

I can feel it, when I walk inside the house, without even seeing her. You can actually feel it in the air.

May you live your life without a bunch of, “done something wrong,” and without a bundle of, “didn’t do something right.” [Didn’t know how to make those phrases plural]

Ha! What gave it away :D

He spent all day and a couple hundred dollars whacking a little ball around for fun. Why would she be upset?

There is always the singles life. No asking permission for anything.

Think man, think!

No groveling!?

yep

A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: “Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man.” The other man replies, “Yeah, well, we were married 35 years.”

I wonder what would happen if he just waited for a while in the room he’s in.

I’ll admit there might be advantages to being in a relationship, but being single my whole life , on the whole has been better. I rarely loose an argument and don’t have to make excuses for anything.

Very fetching outfit

Not a good signs.

Are you a Man or a Mouse? Men Do Not Crawl!

Bob said he was going out to get milk. 19 holes later, he comes back home without the milk & she knows it.

Her passive non verbal communication skills are preferred to her aggressive (read: frying pan) non verbal ones.

I owned a model train store; one comment I heard many times from the WIVES of the model railroaders was that they were glad their hubbys were into that hobby because they always knew where he was!

Abandon all hope ye who enters here.

“What do you mean I ruined your birthday? I didn’t even REMEMBER your birthday!”

Very clever, very funny and great toon art…

Golfing on a long holiday weekend. Instead of visiting her relatives. He is so dead.

After playing golf, he’s got a new game to play: minesweeper.

Leave her 12 from your case of beer. She gets to drink as much as you and doesn’t have to watch you play golf.

I must admit to having been in a situation where I knew I’d done something wrong, but had no idea what it was …

Bob, how dare he enjoy life. Now grovel for forgiveness.

Really!! Sitting on the couch drinking wine in the house that is provided by his income!! She should be crawling!!

Is this maybe a message from Wiley asking for help?