Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 29, 2023

Have an atheist friend who told me he would join every religion “just in case” if he was told he had 6 months to live.

Did Stephan pastis “find” religion all of a sudden in jail on his book tour or something like that?! Why is he “pushing” deathbed repentance so HARD?! Dan aka…

On your way to Hell, just make a U-turn.

Don’t worry about it Rat. No such thing. Statement based on the lack of evidence presented.

That is why praying to the Lord and repenting every day is important. Although I don’t do it much.

I repent every night, then commit the same sins the next day!

Build up an escrow account of good deeds.

How not to go to Hell? Ask somebody who’s been there and come back to describe the route they took.

How not to go to hell? Only by Salvation by grace through faith.

This actually is what they did in the middle ages. Confessed just before death.

Just don’t be a jerk in life.

As Rat avoids the buses he gets smashed by a truck!

Welcome to hell Rat!

Rat could also have an enemy put a knife in his back or a bullet into the back of his skull so he better add “eyes in back of his head” to the list.

Some smart watches can detect car crashes. You could program it to apologize for you.

Eh but what if you is get hit by car? Or by motorbike? Or by Jef the cyclist on his bicycle?

Strangely, a lot of people seem to have this life plan.

is it just me or it feels a little weird that Goat gets to the end without even being beaten

I have been told to go there many times!

I am puzzled by the notion of a god who gives you free will but has a conniption when you use it.

Better to die suddenly after getting hit by a bus, than be in pain the rest of your life

And bullets and knives and hand grenades and gas leaks and meteors and .. other stuff.

Sadly so many people only reach out for faith & redemption when their end is near.

There is no Hell….. there IS a Toledo Ohio….

What do you mean it has to be sincere? I practiced thoroughly.

Heaven? Hell? Yeah, no. The impossibility of believing in places that cannot ever be confirmed exists and only by hoping it does to avoid the harsh truth that death is the end? That’s a step too far for a realist.

Rat ain’t ever going to Heaven.

This was an old EC horror comic. The villain would do evil all week, then go to church on Sunday and confess. One Saturday night he gets arrested and stabbed in jail…

Live the best life you can.

Repentance <> apologize.

Just by these comments, I can see why the road to destruction (hell) is wide.

A half-hearted apology will not cut it, Rat. Grace through faith in Christ.

Not how it works.

The bible is full of ridiculous stories.

it’s an hour a week and sometimes a little more, but if you want to believe, believe. if it does help, how is that a bad thing!

Wow. I bet that’d fool God.

One difference in Christianity and other religions is the miracles documented in four of the books of the New Testament. Any other prophets raised the dead?

So if the unbeliever is correct in the non-existence of God, when he/she dies, no harm, no foul. But if they are wrong and there is a God, they may be missing out on the greatest gift. So best to take the plunge. There is a name for that reasoning, but it escapes me at the moment.

If you don’t believe in Hell, can you go there?

So if God(s) is perfect Love, and love forgives, and God gave us free will, then why would he/she/ them/ pink/purple/ rock/paper/ scissors, send you to hell for making a choice they made possible?

This is the big question. This is the greatest question. Is there hell? Will i go there? All wise men will consider this.

Busses should have louder horns.

No religion in our cartoons!!!!!!!!!!!……………….Or was it politics? I can’t remember. Hey anal people, was it politics or religion that you didn’t want in your cartoons? Or was it just Pearls that you didn’t want it in? What about political cartoons? Can they have politics in them? Politics, but no religion? Got it!!! Thank you, anal, controller people.

You’re screwed

For years, that was my plan. Lived life my way and the heck with God. Then one day I was in an auto accident – car rolled over on the highway and came to rest upside down. You don’t always get to choose.

“Not afraid of going to hell.” Ron Reagan.

If you don’t believe in an afterlife Hell, nothing to worry about. If you believe in a hell, then look at is you are living in it now and death will set you free. Life without God is known as hell.

Folks, there is absolutely no evidence you’re gonna go anywhere when you die.

What if a piano falls on your head, Rat?

“How not to go to heII?  Simple…just stay off that road “paved with good intentions!”

That works. Avoid reincarnation as a toad

How not to go to hell or heaven, just die. There is no afterlife, just death.

honestly before I got saved I had the first panel as my plan to get into heaven

HOW NOT TO GO TO HELL

Vote to expel Santos

I was born Methodist. I’ve always liked their belief in good deeds, public service, and kindness as a way to Heaven— escape Hell by making the world less hellish.

Go back to Earth and reform Moe and Larry

“The fearlessness of Nac Mac Feegle warriors in combat is derived from their religious belief that they cannot be killed, because they are already dead; they believe that they are in the afterlife, and that any Feegle who is killed has simply been reincarnated into the world where they have already lived before. They reason that Discworld, with the sunshine, flowers, birds, trees, things to steal and people to fight, must be some sort of heaven, because ‘a world that good couldn’t be open to just anybody.’ They consider it a kind of Valhalla, where brave warriors go when they are dead. So, they reason, they have already been alive somewhere else, and then died and were allowed to come to the Discworld because they have been so good.”

I find it interesting that lately there have been a number of strips, here and on Non Sequitur specifically, dealing with theological subjects. I wonder if it is because they love the debates it causes, or is it because some have real concerns if there may be truth to some beliefs.

As for the strip for today, making a quick confession at a point just before death is not repentance. To repent means to turn away from a wrong course and give evidence that you have left it behind. That takes time.

With Pig and Rat, there’s always lame solutions to everything.

The place has to be full of U.S. Political Party Card Carrying Members.

Foxhole religion; or is that rathole?

…and asteroids…

Hard to argue that logic.

Riding on the bus is helpful. It’s the best way to avoid being hit by a bus.

I swear there ain’t no Heaven, and I pray there ain’t no Hell, but I’ll never know by livin’, only my dyin’ will tell.

…or you could just keep apologizing every moment you’re awake!

Except you actually have to mean it, saying the words out of fear and not genuine remorse won’t help you much.

Lets face it, any god would have seen the bus and stopped it. Not a good look letting people get run over and a ‘I am sorry’ just doesn’t cut the mustard’.

You all realize that this strip is basically a rehashing of the saying that goes: Too many people who wait until the 11th hour to repent die at 10:45

Practical Rat!

But Rat probably is headed Down There anyway….