B.C. by Mastroianni and Hart for June 22, 2024

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    Dusty9  9 months ago

    Exactly correct.

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    angelolady Premium Member 9 months ago

    Grog readingā€”of course. Heā€™s not a barbarian, after all.

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    Mediatech  9 months ago

    The only time you can be sure a politician is telling the truth, is when they are calling another politician a liar.

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    Scorpio Premium Member 9 months ago

    Technically, the wallet is shaken before the election too.

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    Enter.Name.Here  9 months ago

    ā€œIā€™m a politician, which means Iā€™m a cheat and a liar, and when Iā€™m not kissing babies, Iā€™m stealing their lollipops.ā€ ā€“ The Hunt For Red October

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    B UTTONS  9 months ago

    A real politician ā€¦ a person who shakes your hand and pockets your wallet before an election, then taxes you for the return of your empty wallet after.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians firstā€¦

    If they survive, the vaccine is safe.

    If they donā€™t, the country is safe.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    Youā€™d think politicians have bigger issues to tackle than housework and cleanliness.

    Yet they often call for sweeping reforms.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    So I just found out some politicians with bowel problems are unfairly helping other politicians with bowel problems rise to power.

    I guess our government has a problem with crohnyism.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    Which symptom is shared by all the politicians worldwide?

    Constipation. They are always full of sh*t.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    Did you hear about the politician who came home late at night after a hard day at work?

    He was Satiredā€™

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    I canā€™t believe I got arrested for impersonating a politicianā€¦

    I was just sitting around doing nothing.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    Politicians and diapers have one thing in commonā€¦

    They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

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    littlejohn Premium Member 9 months ago

    Every time I hear a politician speak, I have this overwhelming feeling that Iā€™ve heard this bullsh*t before.

    Psychologists call it DĆ©jĆ  poo.

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    Ron Dunn Premium Member 9 months ago

    The one that always gets me is the ā€œI approve this messageā€ or you get those PAC groups who like to sling mud at their opponent or candidate.

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    Botulism Bob  9 months ago

    Once you donate to a politician, your name stays on his email list forever, which is why I have yet to donate.

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    donlackie  9 months ago

    A person who has no plans or ideas so instead of trying to convince you to vote FOR them, they try to scare you into vote AGAINST the other candidate

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    njchris  9 months ago

    A person who shakes your hand with his left hand while emptying you pocket with his right hand

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    preacherman Premium Member 9 months ago

    The thing is, Grog ole boy, thatā€™s their job. Without taxation you can kiss the military, medicaid, social security, ATDC, most roads and bridges, and quite a few jobs goodbye.

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    dflak  9 months ago

    This is not the season for it, but.

    It was so cold in DC last week that several Congressmen were seen with their hands in their own pockets.

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    ChessPirate  9 months ago

    And your confidence after thatā€¦

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    Man of the Woods  9 months ago

    Spot On !!!

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    SirThomas  9 months ago

    Based on what Iā€™m receiving in the mail, before the election one hand shakes and the other reaches around to the wallet.

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    Doug Taylor Premium Member 9 months ago

    A politician is someone who knows all the words to ā€œTaxmanā€

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    GiantShetlandPony  9 months ago

    Only for the workers. The rich pay in advance to ensure the workers pay more.

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    LONNYMARQUEZ  9 months ago

    now it is before and after

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    Daltongang Premium Member 9 months ago

    ā€œPoliticians are a lot like diapers. They should be changed frequently, and for the same reasons.ā€ ā€• Mark Twain

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    ladykat Premium Member 9 months ago

    Good definition.

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    1953Baby  9 months ago

    Huh. Theyā€™ve pretty much got their hands out for your wallet ALL the time. . .the amount of money spent on campaigns could feed all the low-income folks in thiscountry. . . could pull schools out of deficit. . .could. . .

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    paulprobujr  9 months ago

    When one shakes your hand, better count your fingers afterward.

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    jconnors3954  9 months ago

    Truer words never spoken.

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    bilbrlsn  9 months ago

    Almost everyone I have ever done business with has shaken my hand and then my wallet. That is kind of the characterization of an economy in a stable society.

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    grange Premium Member 9 months ago

    Election n. A process by which the people choose who shall pick their pockets for a set term.

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    stamps  9 months ago

    NO, no, heā€™s got it backwards. First they pick your wallet, then they shake your hand.

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    waes-hael  9 months ago

    Whiner: The person who doesnā€™t participate in local politics, then wonders why theyā€™re constantly disappointed.

    Seriously, enough with the hyperbole about politicians: WE elect ā€˜em. If you voted without knowing the politician, thatā€™s on you.

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    zeexenon  9 months ago

    Just dust and overdue notes will fall out of mine.

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    Silence Dogood Premium Member 9 months ago

    Har de harā€¦bashing politiciansā€¦har de harā€¦

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    mindjob  9 months ago

    After they take your money, they raise your taxes

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    EXCALABUR  9 months ago

    They even want your money before as a campaign contribution

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    nyg16  9 months ago

    Orangie the clown shakes your wallet before, during and after

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    Strawberry King  9 months ago

    As usual, theyā€™re right on the money.

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    bwswolf  9 months ago

    Now-a-Days they shake your hand as they pick half of your wallet now and then the other half after the election ā€¦. ;)

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    David Huie Green LikeNobody'sEverSeen  9 months ago

    Pay for all the things you wanted??

    I thought someone else (anyone else) was supposed to pay for it.

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    thejanith Premium Member 9 months ago

    Love it! Thanks for the laugh. And thanks, by the way, for making it a general laugh at all politicians without poking at any one of them. In an election year, we need all the clean (no mud slinging) laughs we can get.

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