Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 14, 2025

Har har. You sleigh me.

Who knew that parking near a chimney was as bad as parking near a fire hydrant??

It was the reindeer deposits that got him in trouble.

Oh, but what happened to the reindeer? (Reminds me of a Colin Mochrie joke: “Rudolph dead at 57. The famous reindeer was killed in an accident over Barcelona involving a flock of geese and a 747. Witnesses reported that the reindeer over Spain was hit mainly by the plane.”

You have to wonder how many tickets Santa got for parking on roofs.

It was for exceeding the light speed limit.

Were the reindeer shipped off to a wildlife sanctuary in Florida???!!!

Santa is really in debt at this time of year.

That would just be Christmas, not “the holiday season “

Does santa’s sleigh actually have a picture of santa printed on the side? That was an odd choice.

The sleigh was impounded after a hit & run incident involving the fatality of a Grandma.

That’s what you get for double parking in Manhattan.

For illegal roof parking?

Parked in a ‘no sleds’ zone.

Oh, no!

That is so awful, you get a prize.

Grandma got run over by a reindeer

Walking home from our house Christmas Eve.You can say there’s no such thing as Santa,But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.

She’d been drinkin’ too much eggnog,

And we’d begged her not to go.But she’d left her medication,So she stumbled out the door into the snow.

When they found her Christmas mornin’,

At the scene of the attack,There were hoof prints on her forehead,And incriminatin’ Claus marks on her back.

Where is Santa going to get the money for both the impound and the ticket on the sleigh?

funny part, male reindeer lose their antlers after rut which occurs in Sep/Oct/Nov, females retain their antlers through winter. Another case of females doing the impossible and males taking credit.

Nah.Kiddie amusement park went bankrupt

The sleigh got impounded when Rudolph’s cousin, Leroy the Redneck Reindeer, had to sub for Rudolph due to illness and Leroy ended up with a DUI.

After Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny left his sleigh on the Florida beach illegally, it was towed to the impound lot.

That’s what you get when you let the drunk Santa drive in the Macy’s Parade.

After some investigation, that’s an olde sleigh, Santa sent it to be recycled.

Santa will be riding in a E-Sleigh next Christmas. Custom made by Hyundai. Reindeer will still be used for personal appearances.