Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for January 28, 2025

Yes. We’re aware. Thanks.

Where’s Crankshaft?

“It wasn’t ‘Spider-Man’?” You should be so lucky. It wasn’t even the furshlugginer Forbush Man!

Drawing full photomount corners for that middle panel would have been too much effort? Okay. Now why does the guy behind the desk look so much like Batting Zero? Was the editor really the young and inexperienced guy with the soup-strainer mustache, who has just looked through Batting’s portfolio and doesn’t know how to get rid of him?

I was able to engage with this one. Trying to care about all these nonCranky characters….

I look forward to seeing how this bottom-rung editor abused poor, humble, long-suffering Battin Zero.

Is this first time someone hijack their own komix to turn it into their own autobiography or it happen before in other komix too?

Next he’ll say that he gave Stan Lee some pointers on drawing..

And of course this is where the first lines of the song came from….

Spider-Man, Spider-Man

Does whatever a spider can

The strip sounds like a reminiscence of a budding cartoonist. Batiuk (or this character) had a lot to look back on for his cartoonist career (to come).

Didn’t Batuik mean it wasn’t Archie?

Today is National Kazoo Day. I don’t have the slightest idea why,and I’m not sure I want to know

they should call the strip cranksnooze when skippy is featured

Soap opera or comic??

“Emily! I need a headline for this interview!”

“Ummm… ‘Bat Hack Looks Back at Past Flack!’”

I wonder if that’s how the “Miss Peach” classic comic strip started.

“Batty man, Batty man. Does whatever a Batty can. Cut and Paste, Winkerbean. We all know, It’s obscene. Hey wow, here comes the Batty maaaan!”

as for me a sly introduction to Go Comics announcing the return of all 50 years of Funky Winkerbean makes sense. 2.7.25 is the announced start of the run.

This sequence just goes to prove they always return to the scene of the crime.

Honk shoo. Zzzzzzzzzz. This dull-as-dishwater story arc isn’t exactly the origin of Marvel Superheroes, is it? Has anyone reading Crankshaft ever wondered how TB got his start in comic strips? How is his tale more noteworthy than anybody else’s?

TB: It’s different because it’s me!

We get it TB. This self-serving fan service story arc is some kind of therapy for an empty trophy case, isn’t it?

Someone on here (I wish I could remember who) said that the sudden tonal shift away from Funky Winkerbean, whiplash storylines, and unusually bad (even for Dan “Copy-Paste” Davis) is an indication that a certain Batiuk was given an ultimatum to provide the strip he is being paid to write and not Funky Winkerbean if he wanted to be in print in 2025. Suddenly losing his backlog of Funky Winkerbean-themed strips would explain all of this junk. I think they were right.

Yesterday, I extended a challenge to a couple of Negative Nellies. These two commenters seem to be only concerned with the commenting behavior of other readers. They have nothing else to contribute to the discussion.

At this time, neither constant-complainer has taken me up on my “Positive Comment Challenge”, which was simply to post a comment in the Crankshaft discussion that isn’t complaining about the behavior of other commenters.

Here’s a new, less restrictive requirement: The positive comment no longer has to be about the Crankshaft comic strip. I understand. It’s hard to find anything positive about the current story arc. A simple positive comment such as “I like dogs” or “I like Santa” would satisfy the challenge. I have faith in you. You can do it. Positive thoughts.

P 4: "…but then he said “did you think I was serious?…take this crap and get the hell out of my office, you gullible clown…hahahaaaaaa!…”, oh!…and, uh, then he threw my briefcase of drawings out in the hall too.

I’m curious how much longer it will take for Batton Thehatches to realize that Skippity-Do-Dah isn’t taking notes or recording anything with his phone on the table. In the meantime, Batton remains completely oblivious, relishing the sound of his own voice. Sad and pathetic.

Batyuk blogged about the day he visited the offices of Marvel Comics.

Good grief. Is Batyuk still bitter about that day 50 years ago when they failed to instantly recognize his self-proclaimed genius and immediately bestow ‘The Amazing Spider-Man’ title to him?

Jeez. Take it easy, Tom. It’s all over now. Let it go. Deep breaths. Namaste.

What’s interesting about this is how TB downsizes everything. Batteringram Thomas doesn’t go to New York, invade the offices of DC and Marvel, and get soundly rejected; he goes to the “local paper” (the Sentinel?) and his output is promptly accepted. “It wasn’t Spider-Man,” he says, as if he’s known all along that he’s not in that league and is comfortable with the fact. He’s happy to get into the local paper’s “Tuesday Teen Page.” He sounds almost… like TB from an alternate universe where he knows who he is and is comfortable and even content with it.

I dunno… maybe Batton is TB’s way of letting go, of learning to be content with the (rather successful) career he had rather than constantly harping about the One That Got Away. If so, I wish him well in this.

Oh, dear. We did lose Crankshaft again. What’s up with that? If you need Cranky-puns, just ask!