Crankshaft by Tom Batiuk and Dan Davis for September 16, 2024

Oboy! First comment!!

This cannot be Batiuk. What happened to “tell, don’t show”?

The comic was late in posting!

Looking at the first panel, in which an opaque brown liquid is being poured onto the steps (from a can helpfully labeled “GASOLINE”), I wonder: is Centerville’s raw sewage… combustible?

Then again, Centerville’s close to Worstview, which is canonically Medina, which is close to Cleveland, whose river caught fire often enough that Great Lakes Brewing named a beer after the event…

Brown gasoline is highly flammable!

The old hag soils her Depends.

Someone is very passionate about not the school not assigning that book. Les house is next.

Time to call Scooby and the gang!

Will Pittsville FPD arrive in time to save Lil’s shop? Will Pittsville PD find the shop burner, when Centerville couldn’t (wouldn’t) ? For these answers come back Same Batiuk Channel.

So I’m guessing Les is doing this to make himself more of some kind of hero? Who else instantly knows about the books? One of the parents? Unless it’s Edgar who finally came back from his boat rowing adventure and finally decided to get revenge on the woman who ruined his potential married life.

Wait, isn’t the bookstore on the upper floor of her house? How is she looking out the window across the yard at it? Since when did she have a second building on her property, which is impossible for a multitude of reasons, the biggest of which it is not zoned for commercial.

The !#%#! vandals! Don’t they realize (or care) that she lives over her bookstore?

oh by wednesday they will say it was just a bad dream

Finally! Crankshaft is back!

Panel 2 looks like Ebenezer Scrooge.

Ha ha ha. Me wil burns first two steps to the book store. They’ll never be able to climbs up and goes to book store ever again. Its called burning. Bwa ha ha ha ha!

An act of terrorism.

Wait! Who is the dirty fink rat snitch here? Who told GASOLINE gusher that the reverse MacGuffin was at Lillian’s Duralog with property taxes?

She calls 911 to report a fire, the fire department responds to Crankshaft’s house out of habit. Precious moments are lost!

Even though this situation could have all been avoided by Les handing the book out himself and not getting a bookstore involved…

Even though this arsonist is only deciding to do this now despite both bookstores having sold Fahrenheit 451 at all times until the present…

Even though this arsonist should have no idea that the books are there unless that person is actively tracking Les’s actions and was tipped off by this from one of the people who helped move the books yesterday…

I still want to thank Tom Batiuk for actually showing an actual The Burnings today! Look! Something actually happened in this arc, and we are able to see it! We’re only 22 days into the arc and something actually happened! Wow! How fortunate we are.

Nice to see the surprise cameo by EC Comics’ Old Witch in Panel Two.

Starting the fire at the bottom of the steps and hoping it climbs up to the store? That is one lazy book burner.

Yep, they’ll blame Ed for doing it as revenge to get his strip back.

So what’s the diabolical plan here? Set fire to the bottom steps of the stairway leading to the bookstore? I mean, a home fire extinguisher could put an end to that easily. Or even a pitcher of water (preferably a green pitcher). Why would you not, like, go to the TOP of the stairs, break into the store, and douse the whole place with gasoline?

The idea that this is all being done by Best Actress Academy Award Winner Les Moore to make himself look like the hero is looking more and more likely. I mean, it’s either that, or this is the world’s most incompetent arsonist. (And those two options aren’t mutually exclusive.)

Also, the stairs in panel 1 and the stairs are panel 3 are CLEARLY not the same. Panel 1’s stairs are a lot steeper than panel 3’s. (Panel 1 matches what we normally see of the store, other than in Saturday’s strip.) It’s called art continuity!

They’ll see your fire through the dark night sky

I hope you’re home when I arrive

If the there’s a fire in the afterlife

I’ll be there again to light the MATCH!

(chorus of I Am The Arsonist by Silverstein)

This wouldn’t happen Ohio Tom

It’s one of Creepy Les’s many students from over the decades, angered that Batiuk is suddenly making Les look like a good teacher with good students. Maybe Owen the Idiot has finally discovered fire.

Where people burn books, they will try to burn people.

If you ask me,I believe all these burnings are the doings of Becky’s mom from FW. Roberta’s crazy,even wanting faith-based majorette costumes once (as a Christian,I don’t claim her).

Once again, I’d never want to call this “art” (as in "life imitating…), but it’s worth pointing out that over the weekend Ohio’s junior senator continued to promote a debunked racist claim about LEGAL Haitian immigrants that has resulted in bomb threats and Neo-Nazi marches.

If Batty has any balls, the left-behind clue will be a MAGA hat.

“We don’t need no water, let the mutherf*cker burn…. Burn mutherf*cker…. Burn!” >

YouTu.be /Adgx9wt63NY?si=USpdJFLYdOr0xwap

Ed’s doing some overnight barbecuing

Call Crank……he will know what to do!!!!!

Not gonna speculate; just gonna wait and see.

Hope her fire insurance is up to date.

GAH! No one was suppose to know where the banned books were hidden! It has to be someone within the group!

Where are arsonists targeting bookstores? I’m seen nothing in the news.

batiuk holding fans hostage by these overpriced aprons and hats or never see crank again

In the third panel, Lillian’s perspective is off. According to previous strips, Lillian’s detached garage is positioned facing the street to the left of her house. For Lillian to see the fire on the steps, her house would have to be in the roadway. Sort of inconvenient for people driving down the street.

Is her house on the back of a flatbed truck on the way out of town?

To be fair, the view in the second panel works fine if Lillian’s bedroom has a window on the left side of her house.

Also, the artwork in the second and third panels is notably better than the first. Davis must found some of Chuck Ayers’s art to copy and paste for those two panels. Clumsy application of the borrowed artwork would explain the shift of Lillian’s perspective of the fire. Dan ‘Close Enough for Batiuk Work’ Davis strikes again.

The arsonist is wearing gloves. This could be a clever disguise. The arsonist has to be someone who knew about Creepy Les’s plan to use a not-recommended book in class, including the bit where Les brought the books to Lizard Lil’s garage. Cayla and Principal Nate would be top of my list here; the gloves would keep the readers from noticing that the arsonist is one of the rare black people in this strip. The motive would have absolutely nothing to do with book-banning. A personal grudge against Les would perfectly undermine that aspect of the story.

Please let Lillian die in the fire. Please let Lillian die in the fire. Please please please.

I’d like to believe the arsonist is Ed Crankshaft.

Ed: Goddammit, Lillian, you’ve hijacked my comic strip for the last time. It’s titled ‘Crankshaft’, not McKenzie! Get your own @#$% comic strip!

Perhaps the arsonist was only able to light the fire at the foot of the stairs because they’re in a wheelchair.

I’ve always pointed out that Lillian’s bookstore should be in trouble for not providing handicap access. Could it be someone angry because Lillian continually ignores the reading needs of the handicapped?

We know it’s not, but wouldn’t it make for more interesting reading than some faceless person/persons with an unclear motive?

People want to burn multiple bookstores in different communities over Fahrenheit 451? I continue to ask why.

Predictable.

The arsonist has two hands, so Skippy is in the clear. As is Becky, with her disarming smile.

I so want it to be Eugene, who has no interest in the books at all. He just wants to FINALLY take revenge on Lil for the evil deed she did to destroy her sister’s life and deprive Eugene of a happy married life.

But, as always, that would be interesting and so is definitely not how the story will turn out. Batty never does interesting.

OH NO!

No one should have to fear vigilante justice. No one ever.

Was the arsonist hired by Lillian, in order to burnish her store’s reputation?

Murderer……

I never read Funky Winkerbean in my life and never wanted to. I did read what used to be a cartoon about Crankshaft, and I liked it and most of the characters in it. I don’t know the backstory on Lillian, but I like bookstore owners and don’t like people who burn books. And I really don’t like people who hate older women and ignore characters who are supposed to be in a story. Where’s Cranky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop drop and roll.