Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 10, 2020

I’m not sure Jeff’s life expectancy is that long if you take into consideration how many bicyclists are killed by cars.

Rat’s life expectancy matches his stature – short.

Jeff’s life expectancy matches his common sense – zero.

A happy life doesn’t always mean a short one; George Burns lived to be 100 while smoking cigars and drinking martinis. Rat may actually be on to something.

As a former bicycle nut, I agree with Rat.

When I used to go to the gym, my wife said, “Don’t you feel better afterwards?”

“No, I don’t feel at all different either way.”

I think people are missing the main point in this strip… their feeling of superiority to others!

Philosophy in art.

Know what shortens life? It’s the healthy living zealots who go around shaming us for enjoying ourselves. That causes stress and as everyone knows, stress is bad for you! ;/

Score 50 points for Rat.

I’m told that if you stop eating bacon you will lengthen your life by about 4 years. Four awful, baconless  years!

That fried chicken and six pack sound a lot better than veggie burgers nutri-grain bars. I’ll take the shorter life and love it

Everyone has to find their own path. However, there is something to the exercise routine. In general, people who exercise feel better mentally (less depressed, clearer thinking) and physically (fewer aches and pains, less likely to end up in a nursing home as they age). There will always be exceptions, but if you go with stats, exercise has its merits. If you want to go another route, nothing wrong with that.

You’d think a kind Universe would tell us how long our performance must last—like any good theater manager.

Jef is right. Exercise helps us feel better every day

“Enjoy your long, sucky one” sounds dirty, Rat.

I ride my bike so I can enjoy fried chicken and beer.

Not so different than my vegetarian brother & sister-in-law. They may or may not live longer, but it will certainly seem like it. Not only that, but considering how much time they spend “playing” with their food, it’s a dead loss. Or maybe it’s a hobby…

It’s a trade-off. I love fried chicken, but not at every meal.

“I feel better when I eat a bucket of fried chicken washed down by a six-pack.”

I’m surprised Jef didn’t hurl the instant he heard that.

With Rat on this one ! … Croc Power !

From Wikipedia (yes, I know it’s not reliable – but I remember this):

“James Fuller Fixx (April 23, 1932 – July 20, 1984), known as “Jim Fixx,” was an American who wrote the 1977 best-selling book The Complete Book of Running. He is credited with helping start America’s fitness revolution by popularizing the sport of running and demonstrating the health benefits of regular jogging. He died of a heart attack while jogging at 52 years of age…"

Please compare his lifestyle & longevity with those of Willie Nelson & Keith Richards…………………..

Man: Doctor, will I live to be 100 years old?

Doctor: Do you drink?

Man: No.

Doctor: Do you smoke?

Man: No.

Doctor: Do you go to parties and stay out all night?

Man: No.

Doctor: Are you sexually active?

Man: No.

Doctor: The hell do you wanna live to be 100 for?

Thank you, Rat.

To quote Rat from another day’s strip (Oct 21, 2018): Life is an amusement park. And while you’ll stay there longer, all the rides will be closed.

let’s play a round of ‘whose template is it’:

life is hard, things happen, what is the point of even trying

the boss is a moron and the rest of us are so witty

cats are mean no matter what, dogs are cute no matter what as long as they can do puppy eyes

Eat well, stay fit….die anyway.

Feels pretty good to be in good shape…

WHERE ARE THE CROCS? BET THEY AGREE W/ RAT!

Grilled salmon and Scotch.

I’ve known more old drunks than old doctors!

Hurt yourself enough and the body starts making its own pain relievers.

en·dor·phin /ˌenˈdôrfēn/

any of a group of hormones secreted within the brain and nervous system and having a number of physiological functions. They are peptides which activate the body’s opiate receptors, causing an analgesic effect.

Getting high the hard way.

Jeff is my heroe!

I don’t usually side with rats but I’m going to have to on this one.

Exercise like biking produces happiness endorphins. I go the gym and make a sad attempt at strength training on the Nautilus machines, but I feel good while doing it and better about myself afterwards. Plus, it keeps me moving with my bad back and other ailments.

My sister’s husband was exactly like the bike guy in this comic; in fact “the bike guy” was how he was known in the neighborhood. He constantly nagged me about how my diet was going to kill me. They both are long gone, him to a heart attack and her to cancer. I’m still here and very healthy.

Well, I’ve learned recently the runner’s high of decades past beats ED.

As Buddy Hackett said: the health fanatics are going to be so confused/disappointed years from now when they’re in the hospital dying of nothing.

Why can’t you do both?

Whatever keeps you happy. I’ve known all types and seen some thrive and some die and many struggle. Just die happy when it’s time.

I’m kinda with Rat on this one.

For some time now, Pastis seems to be in a philosophical funk; mostly co-starring Pig and Rat; no Crocs, no Guard Duck etc…

He’s a rat, so he’s probably got four or five years anyways.

My bro had a buddy die on him years ago. The guy worked out all the time, and had only 8% body fat. He died at only 50 years old. You cannot exercise your way out of a congenital bad heart.

My mother was born in 1896 and she died at 102 years of age. She ate lard and ate food that 99% of people would have thrown out. She liked to drink whiskey and water, went up on the roof to repair it in her late 80s, had not seen a doctor for at least 30 years, took no medications other than asprin and lived by herself for quite a while until at age 94 she moved into a home. Makes you wonder.

Sign at a Neighborhood restaurant: “Wine, because great stories never start with a salad”. Words to live by.

Jef the Biker lives an up-tight life, tight as the spandex he flaunts. Rat is right; fried chicken and beer is better than Jef’s smugness….

Sorry to see that Jef hasn’t been ran over by a Mack truck yet.

And Rat is an idiot :^)…

67 yo cyclist here. I ride with folks mostly in their 60s and 70s and we have a lot of fun and are in great shape for any age. There is some of Joe the Cyclist in us, but cycling makes us feel free and strong.