Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for February 06, 2024

L’esprit de l’escalier (in this case, l’esprit de couloir )

Calvin could literally be talking to anyone at this point.

Ask Hobbes for comebacks and write them down on a list.

Witty comebacks are overrated. Go with something accessible and direct like “poopy-head”.

A lot of us wish we could do that.

He choked!!!

Something quick and snappy like OH YEAH?

Get Tracer Bullet to hunt for a good comeback.

I remember the time I bought a fake beard at a costume store. It was close to Halloween, so the whole staff were wearing costumes like sailor and convict and druidess. A guy dressed as Superman sold me a thing of glue to make the beard stick on and said, “Wait a minute for it to become tacky.” I wish I’d responded, “In the costume business there’s no such word as tacky!”

Don’t we all wish that.

Could be why schoolkids are packing heat nowadays.

I have the same problem.

Right there with you Calvin.

“Oh, yeah?”

I think 99.9%% of kids were/are wishing that…….

All the Snappy retorts happen later when they lose the rapier Like sting of the moment.

Heard that, Calvin. I can be fairly quick witted online, but in person, not quite so fast. Like that song: So much cooler online.

Chuck Jones has explained that this is one of the reasons why Bugs Bunny is so popular. He can come back with witty comebacks and ways of outsmarting his enemies straight away.

Witty comebacks come to you the next day in the shower.

Oscar Wilde once had a guest who was notorious for his verbal plagiarism. Wilde got off one of his bons mots, and the friend told him, “I wish I’d said that.” Wilde responded, “You will.”

Been wondering that all my life— 3/4ths of a century ! ! ! !

Calvin is me on social media. It’s why I don’t bother much with it anymore

Snarky comeback lines are overrated. Treat people well and usually you won’t wish you had one…usually.

We all do

Ain’t it the truth…

I’ll think of a great comment for this one later

A statement uttered countless times by lowly unworthies who dare disagree with Our Be❤️ed Count… Patriot Extraordinaire, Fighter for Truth, Justice and The American Way; The Voice of Freedom and Friend of the Oppressed. God Bless America!

Often too late to help: I shoulda said . . . If it happens again I’m gonna . . ., or You just wait . . . or One of these days, Bub . . .

“I know you are, but what am I,” works for me and PeeWee Herman.

“Well, the jerk store called and they’re all out of you”

Afterwit-an old word for knowledge which comes too late to be of use.

“That’s it! I’m going back!”

You forgot about the greatest comeback of all time: I DIDN’T ASK!

Sometimes silence is the most eloquent argument.

There was a time as a teen when I was in an argument with my mother and I walked away. She yelled at me, “Come back here and fight with me.”

My response was, “Why? I’m going to lose this one anyway so I decided to take a dive in the first round.”

Like MacArthur or The Terminator?

Like the person is going to remember in a day or two…

Don’t we all!

Well I just came from the jerk store and they’re all out of you!

Several months ago the mother of a friend of mine died and we went to the funeral. they were in NY and so we had to travel-I used to live in NY. At the reception after most of the tables were full of locals, peers of the dead lady so several of us who’d travelled sat separately. A guy came over and asked if he could sit with us since we had a free chair

It just popped out of my mouth.

“Well this is the cool kids table but i guess you can sit here.”

Don’t we all.

same actually… _

So does your mom!

me too

“blistering retort” is pretty cool.

When I was Calvin’s age, we students didn’t have lockers. We had desks, assigned by the nuns. All of our books, pencils, and such were in the desk. There was NO noise in class. Otherwise one would incur the stare of a nun — few things more disconcerting.

C’est vraie..

Snappy responses, wit, and improv only come with years of practice.

Story of my life.

This is me. After a few minutes, I can think of a great comeback, Witty, fitty, nifty, and charming. but by that time, the moment has passed.

Check out today’s Foxtrot Classic homage to Calvin!

Story of my life as a kid.

Don’t we all….

Calvin could borrow a page fr George – just make sure he’s got a snappy comeback for his snappy comeback’s comeback!

same

For snappy responses, I think Groucho Marx was the best

Well, the Jerk Store called, and they’re out of YOU!

Me in real life

His delayed comebacks are like my knowledge of Spanish. I call it Mañana Spanish because I will remember tomorrow what I should have said today.

There was a little girl who only spoke Spanish attending a birthday party for my step-granddaughter. When there was a telephone call from her mother, they asked me to relay the information to the little girl in Spanish. She looked at me oddly but little girls often look at one oddly.

The next day, I realized I had told her to “call herself her mother”.

surrr

I think the majority of us have our best comeback after the fact!!

Me too Calvin

Better start practicing those comeback lines. You might need them soon Calvin

Me Too.

My husband is so good at immediate comebacks, while I’m more like Calvin in this regard.

Everybody does, kid.

Give me a minute, I’ll have something clever tomorrow.

That’s me.

Practice Calvin, practice…

I’ve felt the same way…

If only Calvin were standing on a staircase instead of at his locker… (yeah, or what “that guy” said?)

You’re ugly and your mother dresses you funny.

You and me both, Calvin, you and me both.

“Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!”

All-purpose.

You and me, too, Calvin. You and me, too.