Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 04, 2024

I’m surprised the Comic Strip Censor didn’t react to the first speech balloon.

I’m elderly and I love how people who love to brake check people trust my reflexes.

My father always tailgated, never had an accident but my toes always curled up in fear

Careful you don’t get yourself blown away out there Rat.

Hey Goat, it IS Rat you know!

Tailgaters think if they ride your “assets” you will go faster, always best to let them pass!

As per panel 3, in addition to new friends, some new (or better) insurance might be in order!

Rat’s the one who checks his brakes on his coffee break.

Hmm, I better get one of those bumper stickers, “CAUTION: I brake for no apparent reason.”

Rat’s a “friend?”

2 unused plates, (no silverware), and a cup of tea. Diet Wednesday.

I’m boring, and I know it. I drive the speed limit and I don’t tailgate. I put so much space between our cars that if you come to a screeching halt in front of me, I will still have time to eat a sandwich and take a nap before I have to slow down. I watch the “real drivers” zip around me on the Interstate, only to catch up with the knot of cars ahead of me, then have to worm their way through. Where’s the fun in that? I just turn up the music and set the cruise control. I get where I’m going… every time.

I like to follow that rule of one car length distance for each ten miles per hour, both in front and in back of me. So if someone’s driving 15 feet behind me, that means I’ll have to gradually slow to about 10 mph. I find they’ll usually pass me way before I’m actually going that slow.

The reason people tailgate so Badly in California, is because if you allow 20 feet between you and the vehicle ahead of you, someone will immediately cram their vehicle into it.

I was traveling 50MPH (the speed limit) when a toddler ran at my car out of an unfenced yard. I was able to avoid him by swerving; thankfully, the car behind me was not tailgating, and so was able to stop safely, get out and help the kid.

If they had been tailgating, I likely would have seen that baby get run over in my rearview mirror.

When someone tailgates me I think of that, and it’s really upsetting.

For the total experience, I took my boys tailgating before a Vikings game. People barfing and piissing behind cars. Not family friendly.

I’m going down the highway in the rain and cars are about 8’ apart doing 75MPH! But I am the one who is dangerous doing 60MPH in the right lane from what I understand.

What about Zebra? You could hang out with him.

No, he needs less friends – rat for one.

I hate tailgaters. I try to get rid of them by slowly speeding up to like 85 mph where I know cops hangout for speed traps and then slowing down before I go through.

Yep, pretty much!

You’ll be sorry if you end up in someone’s trunk.

Maybe I should talk with Zebra or Pig more. At least they’re decent people.

This is the exact reason you need a front and REAR dash camera in your car

Years ago, in the early 2000s, my husband was stopped by a police office. He asked Brad if he knew why he’d been stopped. I raised my hand like Horshack and said ’ Oh, oh, I KNOW, I KNOW! He was tailgating!"

ATTACK OF THE HIGHWAY TRAILERS: COMING SOON TO A THEATER NEAR YOU

Just remember, Rat, when you finally cause an actual accident, it will affect you too.

Then way things are going, I think we urgently need a vaccine to protect some people against paranoia.

Maybe you should stop being friends with Rat, that’d be a good place to start

It less safe for the person tailgating than the car in front.

I do that with my giant Fresnel lens, from a safe 6 car lengths back. Instantly freaks out those who cut in ahead of me. Hee-hee!!

Wouldn’t Rat prefer to go to a game’s tailgate and steal other people’s food?

Ah, the joys of the English language..

if you can drive this, you’re reading too close

I want to affix a harpoon to my trunk for such people. Either that, or pull a trailer with a loaded cannon aimed at the tailgater.

I went tailgating last week. got into a lot of accidents

Bet Rat brings a laser as well.

You tried that before, Goat. It didn’t work out.

It’s more fun if your monster truck has REALLY badly aimed headlights.