Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 05, 2024

There will be no non-handicapped parking spots anywhere.

From what I’ve observed, at least half of all people with handicap placards must be mentally handicapped.

If it keeps him away from where I park, I’m for it.

Is there a narrow zone between smart enough to pass the driving test, and stupid enough to qualify as handicapped?

Does disability to parallel parking counts too?

We’re going to need more designated parking spots.

If that qualifies as a disability, no wonder we have a glut of politicians.

You are not alone, Pig!

Around here, in the real world, you have to get an actual factual doctor (who is on the DMV’s actual list of licensed doctors) to give you a form letter that they’ve signed… WITH an end date (which can be “never” in some cases). Then you have to take that to the DMV office and wait an inordinate amount of time to see a clerk who may or may not decide to issue you with a placard allowing you to legally use the handicapped parking spaces. There’s a University here, with a football team. The team doctor can issue such letters, and the coaching staff has a gofer who will do the waiting… IF you’re on the team and have a sprained pinky or something more realistic. Most of the folks I see using said spaces are athletic looking young men, but perhaps 20% of the time it’s someone who more clearly needs it.

I’ve seen some abusers of handicapped plates. I personally know of a woman who has a handicapped plate, parks in a handicapped spot, then proceeds on her daily walk of 4-5 miles. I also know of another woman who has a handicapped plate (because her husband is homebound and handicapped), then parks in a handicapped spot at where she works. That makes things difficult for those who are actually handicapped.

Trump on the news this morning that “Never stop lying” has become his Motto!

Bill Engvall created “Here’s your sign.” Is that the same as a handicap tag hanging from your rear view mirror as your driving? Note: it says on the handicap tag “Do not hang this while driving.”. Thanks Bill!

Pig really is dumb as rocks. He doesn’t have a car.

Insulting rocks first thing in the morning.

Pig dumb? He’s had some of the pithier quotes in this strip.

They don’t make enough placards for everyone that needs one for that disability…

It must be true because the line goes “Dumb as a box of rocks.”

Being kind and hopeful is not dumb. Love you, Pig.

one who is dumb as rocks

should also be one who walks

we don’t need bo(u)lder drivers on the road

Handicap placards? Never heard of those.

I think it was George Carlin who pointed out that the way we drive, it’s a wonder all parking spots aren’t for the handicapped.

At least Pig knows he’s dumb. Too many dummies think they’re smart.

That could work.

People who are dumb as rocks need a special tag that makes them park at the far end of the lot. Obviously this would also include the subset of drivers of jacked up trucks who believe they are entitled to two parking spaces.

Joe Piscopo once played the iconic villain Vermin in the movie Jonnie Dangerously. In on scene he parked in a handicap spot and put up a “psychotic” placard

Youtube : 5zyNkSsA3-s

You only need to see it once…

Once!

We’re going to need a lot more disability parking spaces.

Well, at least he admits it… I guess…

Unfortunately, too many get the handicap placards that don’t need it. They are just lazy. Splinters in your butt from sitting on it all the time does not count as a handicap.

Judging from many of the comments here, a lot of y’all deserve to become disabled so you’ll finally learn some respect for those who are. Just because you can’t see someone’s disability doesn’t mean they don’t have one.

Possibly morally handicapped.

I have one because of my leg. I need my door to open all of the way to get it in. If I’m driving, I will use a handicap space just for that. If my husband is driving, he can let me out at the door or back out of a space so I can get in. One time, a friend and I left a restaurant and people had parked on both side of me so closely that I couldn’t get in. I had to have my friend squeeze in and back out for me.The ones I hate are the people who can’t seem to park straight. I think their handicap is that they’re blind. I’ve seen them park diagonally across the stripes. Or in front of the store and leave the car there! One time, we were in a regular spot and some old person parked in front of us all cattywampus so nobody could park on either side of her. She got out and I yelled at her asking her if she was going to just leave her car like that. She got back in and reparked.

While there are people who deserve / require handicapped parking, I’m struck by how outnumbered they must be by the number of people who believe themselves handicapped and in need of special parking. Our Drs. feed into the issue — they won’t stand up to demanding patients and say, “Get out of your car and walk — it will be good for you”, they will instead fold up and supply the ‘disabled’ documentation. Plus, while the handicapped deserve equal access, they do not necessarily deserve special, priority access; we have yet to figure out how to attain ‘equal’ but not ‘special and priority’.

Oh dear, they will have to allot more & more parking spaces if that’s the case!

Worked for me, except the part of convincing my doctor.

I’ve been taken for granite a few times myself.

Our ballot here has a long list of who can’t vote. One line says: “Idiots and insane people”.

We knew a nurse with a mirror hangtag but was not handicapped. She claimed medical people were exempt!

Each state has it’s own laws, as driving is a privilege, not a right. In the state I live in, the disabled placard is strictly enforced not only requiring a doctor’s evaluation, but allowing police to question those who do not appear disabled.

Ronnie Millsap and Mr. Wonder both have those.

As a person with a handicap, I can attest that some of my fellow handicap drivers fit Pig’s criteria when they leave their carts in the empty handicap space they’re parked next to or when they can’t manage to park within the lines of oversized handicap parking spots.

Some of these comments almost sound like people are jealous of those with disabled parking placards. Don’t worry, if you live long enough you may well get your chance to have one too. Better hope your disability is obvious to the casual observer, or face the wrath of the irritated (irritating) who live to catch others doing something wrong.

most people on the road are…

I understand why Pastis does this, but he is doing a disservice to pigs. They are actually surprisingly intelligent, one reason it is difficult to keep them in an area you want them and out of areas you don’t!

Still missing the ruhtlessness, the inherited money, and the delusions of grandeur to become a Republican shoo-in for the white house.

Better print up a gross, the demand is there.

Dang! I could have gotten my disabled placard a lot sooner!!!

May I introduce you to your next earworm?

No, not the RFK Jr kind – so don’t worry.

Youtube: 3BrCvZmSnKA

Remember: half the population of this world has below-average intelligence…

to all the rocks out there… I’m just saying

Pig’s caught in a “Catch22”. If you are intelligent enough to know you need a disability placard because you are as dumb as rocks, you are not dumb as rocks.