That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for August 21, 2023

My Dearest, I’ve thought of you often these past months…”

Ooh! A squirrel!

/// Her love poetry’s stuck in safe ruts.

She’d be daring, but ‘til now lacked guts.

Straying Thoughts, writer’s block,

and a sick urge to shock.

She’s both going (and writing of) nuts.

“Dear John, it is with a heavy heart I’m writing this letter, Your younger brother is much hotter and we make a really cool looking couple when we are out in public. Also, he is much better in bed.”

why did he turn down the second cup of coffee?

Dear David, this summer was so enchanting. Be sure to stay out of public places. My father is hunting you down with his shotgun. I’m afraid our love child will be fatherless and possibly sold into a labor camp. I will be going to a convent.

Her boyfriend’s testi-cles were not so large as he said, they were more the size of vesicles…

I’m thinking of you and your testiclesAnd wondering why they remind me of my unclesBut now I think that should be unmentionableI’m gonna stop and just go get a popsicle…?

“… but his were the besticles.”

denticles

((“What’s my name again?”))

She could just rub them out, but then I guess it wouldn’t be a love poem.

Elenore stopped writing when she spotted the pool boy wearing spandex. She now had to explain to her beloved why her letter shifted so suddenly to discussing his crotch.

That’s enough fondling the soles of my feet. I need less tickles.

The solution to her writer’s block was obvious to the observer, her thinking cap was on her chair rather than her head.

I wish I could fit the word ‘t*sticle’

Into a rhyme anapestical.

But however I strain

It just comes out mundane

When I’m looking for something majestical.

.

And yes, a word that’s actually in the comic is banned.

“The suicide note is done, now how does he write his signature?”

Where’s Ishmael, he’d nail this one

“Let’s see….. what can I put on my bonnet to spice it up a bit for my date tonight?”

What a spectacle!

A young woman preparing to write/

A limerick, clever and bright/

Discovers (Oy vey!)/

She has nothing to say

(But she’s wearing a lovely frock…

Yes, I do believe the flowers look much better in my mother’s favorite bowl, while, by adding a ribbon, the flower pot makes a matching hat for my dress. Now, to write a note explaining this to mom.

No rhymes? What about obstacles to articles that chronicle spectacles at edible vegetable festivals? Incredible!

Nuts! Writers block.

Shall I compare thee to the mighty oak? Thou art more . . . . um . . . . seedy and . . . . um . . . . broke.

Try majestical.

Lorna tries vaping for the first time.

Solstice*1947 and Call me Ishmael certainly can relate to the young lady’s poetic problem!

Auditioning for the new Twizzler ads.

While composing her sonne’ts poeticals / On her lover’s adorable test!cals / She was stuck for a rhyme / For a very short time / Then remembered his seminal ves!cules.

My favorite bit of alliterative doggerel ( scribed in my rather hazy college days ):

He was tickled under the te$ticles by the tempestuous touch of Time!

Dear Sir:

Of all of the “icles” I test/

Yours were two of the very best../

Frankly, only Donn Rickles/

Had bigger test icles/

Like two ostrich eggs in a nest..///

So I’m sending this invitation/

To join me in c0pulation/

‘Neath the oak in my yard/

Where I’m sure you’ll be hard-/

Pressed to keep up with my exhortations…

There has to be a limerick using Hercules, testic1ese, and batteries…

The first rhyme I thought of was “Pericles”.

Now you know why I don’t even try to write poetry.

Majestical testicals.

“Dear Pencil Eaters Anonymous: I’m afraid I’ve had a relapse….”

Eggs, butter, milk, flour, spectacles.

" MMMM, that log out on the lawn reminds me of him."

Elsa was interrupted while making her shopping list by the young gardener removing his shirt. Moments later she fetched a towel to mop up the drool.

Straying Thoughts: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Paintings by Edmund Blair Leighton" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found and once there find the text string Straying, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly B4 paper size, oil on panel painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3173 (August 21, 2023) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with my comment and replies pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, 45 works (55 times total, including repeats) by him have been used here, the February 14, 2023, strip being the prior.

Mortar and pestle?

Festivals, vestibules, edibles, selectables…

“Straying Thoughts,” 1913

“Shoot. I’m trying to write a Dear John letter, but I can’t even remember his name.”

Chesticles. Duh.

Breasticles.

It’s a false rhyme, but “digestibles” could work.

writing a letter to husband and thinking about doing to him as she is to the about the same size.

Robbie Coltrane teaching Eric Idle how to cross himself in “Nuns on the Run”: Spectacles/Test!cles/Wallet/Watch.

Avoid Icicles.

Oh yes! Now I remember!

I said “Beige. I think I’ll paint the ceiling beige.”

I need to write that down, so that I won’t forget.

I don’t know, popsicle comes to mind.

For Tuesday these things that we ride are newfangled/

but our skirts are getting entangled/

it isn’t the chain/

(although that’s a pain)/

it’s our garments – they’re getting mangled..