Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for February 12, 2020

Men are hoping that they won’t have to sit down in one of those things because that would be creepy.

So there is a solution to this issue now – several really. Bought one for my seriously outdoorsy sister. https://go-girl.com/ She loves it.

Can’t be too many men, the tree’s still alive

Not many trees or outhouses on the desert, worked with a female and our rule was simple, she used the front of the truck, I had the back. If you don’t have a vehicle, everyone has a front and back, back to back, privacy.

Oh, go squat behind a tree (and make sure you know which leaves are which).

To quote Sheldon Cooper, “If the outdoors is so great why did mankind work to perfect the indoors?” ;-)

The girls also wish that they remove the top-left arrow on that sign.

I think that trees encourage the development of a stream of consciousness.

In fact several of my female friends are more interested in hiking, skiing, camping, etc. than many of my male friends. I admit several of the other women friends are less.

I’d call that a sign made by the Robin Williams Genie (If nature calls, you can pee here, here, here, here, here, here, here,here, ANYWHERE!)

https://sectionhiker.com/uh-oh-by-kathleen-meyer/

Ladies, some things are just not our fault.

So women have to deal with lines even in “The Great Outdoors”?

The world is our urinal.

Of course it’s not a problem for Wiley Bears. They somehow use indoor plumbing in the middle of the woods. All efforts to discover how, though, came to abrupt ends.

Here in the US scientist have discovered that diarrhea is hereditary. It runs in your jeans…

To us guys, the world is our urinal

Amen.

But how else are the Wiley bears going to score lunch??

Reason number 1 why I am glad I’m not a girl.

No matter what. Men have outdoor plumbing.

Still glad I got an inny not an outty. Whosoever sees my bare butt – “Whatcha lookin’ at? I’m being discreet. Why ain’t you?” Of course I am usually taking the road less traveled.

Jumanji!

Hey, women have the same option. If a tree is good enough for me it’s good enough for her. Says the divorced guy.

Yeah, how about that?

Not sure, why are there are male and female versions of porta-potties.

Wiley is obviously not a hiker. Women also “visit the Bushes” (as we used to call it when George was in D.C.). In fact, in our biking group, woman sometimes just squat on the side of the road. (This is in the country, however. Sometimes a car will come by, but we’re too old to care.)

“Ever notice it’s mostly men who call it ‘the great outdoors’?” No, I honestly cannot say I ever noticed that. And I suspect it’s not true, except under certain and desperate trying circumstances as pictured above.

Multiple comments about “the world is our urinal”. So, think about it — isn’t it true that "the world is our < insert any noun >?

There is no reason why women cannot pee and poop behind a bush. All of the women hikers I know do. Outhouses and porta-potties are few and far between on most trails.

There is a push on these days (I’ve particularly seen it with Scouts Canada) to strongly discourage using trees due to the potential to attract bears and other wildlife.

My credo: “I like adventures, as long as they have indoor plumbing.”

Imagine how delighted I was when I saw a line at the Men’s Room! At Yankee Stadium!

Another great reason to be a man… The world is our urinal!

whenever I see a long line in front of the ladies’ rest room, it makes me glad to be a man!

There is a very practical reason for women to wear skirts!

Does a bear………………………never mind.

Down home when I was a kid they had those things in the back of the yard with a hole dug underneath for, well you know. I hated them because they drew every kind of spider you can imagine. Have you ever tried to poop when a spider is crawling on you neck?

That can’t be a real outhouse – there’s no moon carved in the door!

The Great Outdoors is just a giant Men’s Room?!?

There’s a reason women wear shorts when hiking in the woods and such.

The one time Freud was right and I have penis envy.

Men say, “Why don’t you just squat?” Women say, “Have ever seen a really BAD case of poison oak?”

Just squat anywhere out of the way.

If we men weren’t outdoors, how could we write our names in the snow?

A real concern for spiders under the toilet seat (and elsewhere) in the Australian bush.

Good grief. Big deal.

In my younger days I could write my name in the snow.

The big Danger of going in the “Great Outdoors” would be losing your balance while squatting and landing in/on the deposit you just made to “Mother Nature”.

That’s the Real reason Outhouses were invented. Sometimes, you just need a place to sit for a few minutes.

I had always been told to check under the lid (if there was one), on those military latrines, for black widow spiders. And sure enough, I once found one under a lid. Glad I found it by looking instead of by it biting me on the butt, or worse.

Just go behind a bush, just make sure it isn’t a current bush, you don’t want to electrocute yourself.

Growing up in the country, the girls also make use of trees and bushes. Just be careful where you stoop, make sure it isn’t poison ivy or oak and don’t pee on a red ant hill (a girlfriend’s brother found that out the hard way – we laughed for weeks at him in his misery!)

Laughed out loud! :-D

I’m remembering that scene in the mini-series of Les Misrables, with al the ladies squatting round one tree and the gentlemen doing target practice round the next…

No reason a woman couldn’t pee in the woods

The whole world is my urinal

For about 10 years we lived in a house built in 1784. Definitely an experience. It had a family cemetery outside our dining room window, and had a guy buried there who died at the Battle of Malvern Hill during the Civil War. I’ve always been interested in history (one of my degrees is in history), and looking back in the records I discovered he served with my great – great grandfather. Now that was a coincidence. The people that built the house had a rather large family, and the old outhouse was still on the property, a THREE SEATER! No waiting! Luckily, we didn’t have to use it.