Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for June 17, 2023

That ice cream story could be a real scoop, Pucky!

“If you’re not going to take this seriously — wait, how empty is that ice cream carton?”

The truth is out there.

I’m with Puck, well is it? One Cat’s empty ice cream carton is another Cat’s Truthsicle!

Cats don’t like orange peels. Putting them in gardens is supposed to repel pooping cats.

Elvis sometimes forgets who the House Detective is…

If you want the truth about trash, you must send somebody to interview Old Mags. The truth is a human’s trash is a raccoon’s treasure.

Sherpuck Holmes and Goldie Watson are on the case!

The truth is I do not know.

Sometimes you got to be ruthless or your reports will be truthless…

Dunno, if the truth is that orange peel, but it’s at least apPEELing…

TOEBEANS! Pucky toebeans! (Georgia is so kind to us—those tiny dots must be Heck to paint…)

Somebody needs to call in Dr. Scuttles or as he’s known in the underground, DEEP DIP. (Sour cream & onion preferred.)

The empty ice cream carton is the truth that the cats didn’t get to sample any.

Let’s hope Elvis never finds a margarine wrapper in the trash. Margarine is not truth, but butter-that-lies …

FBI Agents Dana Goldie and Cat Meewlder are looking for the Truth.

Agent Meewlder says, “The Truth is Out There!”

Today’s case involves the shrieking cat and the smoking man.

The man was involved in an altercation with the cat, and has vanished, leaving only a heavy coconut smell in his wake. The shrieking cat believes some paranormal activity occurred and abducted with treasures from the trash.

Cat and Goldie will be getting dirty on this one! Stay tuned for the X-Files.

Goldie-Is the Truth, that broken light bulb? Maybe they don’t want us to have ideas! Puck-Is the Truth, that banana peel? I think they want us to Slip up! Elvis(looking very angry and turning into a sunflower) -Alright! That’s enough!

I love how Pucky and Goldie are genuinely sincre. They are taking this seriously, or at least a little seriously. I think Elvis is just used to having to deal with Lupin.

Elvis is a bit obsessive, or he secretly likes getting bathed.

Puck: You want answers?

Elvis: I think I’m entitled to.

Puck: You want answers?

Elvis: I WANT THE TRUTH!

Goldie: YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Keep looking. There got to be especial evidence of extremely elusive especially extra-sneaky extraterrestrials

Crack that sack

Cat “trash talk” is back

They’ll find a way to

Find all that truth today, oh oh

What can they do

When they-they-they-they-they

Ain’t got a clue?

They can’t choose, it’s too much refuse

The smell’s too strong

Or maybe it’s tea

Spread out evenly

Well, what could go wrong?

Bad is bad

People will be mad

It’s slime, it’s grime

Orange peel and rotten thyme, oh oh

They’ll know it’s true

That ai-yi-yi-yi-yi

It’s life’s messy goo

- Anthony Hayes / Michelle Grainger / Steve Wadey – Black Is Black – Los Bravos

Don’t let them distract you, Elvis. Keep digging.

Puck and Goldie are on the case!

Yes Puck, the truth IS in an empty ice cream carton. It’s the secret to occasional happiness (well, a full one is)..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-104x-t85G4

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

Tabith-Isis: Hello, fellow kitties and friends. Tabith-Isis here doing an investigative report on Truth in Trash. I am interviewing Cat on the Street Iggy Shipwright. Iggy, what can you tell us about seafaring cats and trash?

Iggy: Well, when you’re at sea you have only so many supplies with you. We try to find a use for everything.

Tabs: Thank you, Iggy. Next we have Royal Procurer Agnes-Ata. Agnes, how do the Procurers handle trash.

Agnes: There are a lot of secrets we’ll never tell, but we try to keep an open mind about trash. Remember, one cat’s trash is another creature’s treasure.

Tabs: And now we have our kitchen cat, Sue Chef. Sue, how does the Royal Kitchen handle trash?

Sue Chef: Well, you know we only serve the best ingredients. Anything left over we try to find a use for, even if it’s to make compost at the Cosmo nursery.

Tabs: And there you have it. Trash. Is there really any such thing? This is Tabith-Isis reporting from the Very Good Pyramid. Where Ora Z just handed me a bag of red dots. Thank you, Ora Z.

Ora Z: These are some of Fe-Anaro’s jewels. They’re practically indestructible.

Tabs: So they’re not only beautiful, but useful. Back to you, Bea..

I’m still disappointed that this didn’t lead to raccoons, but at least we got some amusing Elvis moments. I’m rooting for you, Elvis, the truth is out there.

I still think the holes in the backyard are going to lead to something. Call it a hunch.

Truth is overrated and open to interpretation of the individual!

Truth?…………TRUTH!!!……….Elvis, You can’t handle the truth.

Last panel shows that Elvis’s pants are starting to sag. . . .

They’re just making a point here, Elvis. Might want to pay attention to it.

Any empty ice cream containers here get peeled apart and left flat on the floor for the dog to lick. None of the current cats seem interested. I used to have a cat (Rigil Kentaurus called Tauri) who would not only lick all those empty ice cream containers clean, but also look at me with betrayed eyes if I offered him a sherbet container.

Getting close to smack down time. Elvis is not amused.

Georgia, I do believe the cats may have struck real Zen here!

Time to bring in an expert to provide color (and odor?) commentary:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garbology

Is the truth a lifetime supply of free bacon? Please say it is!

Katie and Pop-Pop are off to the vet for her ‘spa day’. She gets her ‘hair and nails done’. Translated her coat detangled and knots removed and her claws cut. She comes home lovely and prancy. But before she goes, she is not happy.

This is how seriously they are going to take it, yes.

Yes, it is the truth. It can be verified by a panel of randomly selected cats. They will all say that they saw the objects.

A truer commentary on investigative reporting.. reporting what you’re told to or else!

The south Texas weather forecast for this coming week reminds me of this: https://www.gocomics.com/breaking-cat-news/2018/08/05

No kidding: the projected high for Wednesday is 110°F. (That’s 43°C. Seriously.)

Yikes!

I guess Truth is where you see it …

OT piwismom

I used to have weights in the bottom of my kitchen garbage to keep my boy Dudley from tipping it over. I had tried bricks but they were too light so I used weights. I think it was two 5 pound weights if I remember right. He was a determined cat! Especially if he smelled chicken!