Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 18, 2024

Try setting it down and then picking it up again.

My job is providing tech support to scientists (our company sells scientific equipment).

I have a sign on my wall that say:The Laws of Physics: They’re not just recommendations.

What prompted that was an engineer asking if our pump could drive a fluid with the viscosity of honey through a foot long tube with the diameter of a human hair.

Turn it off, wait 15 seconds, then turn it back on.

It told me once they needed to do a HARD RESET on my terminalI asked him if he ment to turn it off and then back because we already did that twice on he got real quiet

All he has to do is turn his back to the sabertooth that’s charging at him.

If it’s not the system, it’s the training. Or lack thereof.

Somebody didn’t read the manual.

Just turn the bow off and back on and then it’ll work fine.

Did that once, trying it with a golf ball and a tree… dammed near took my eye out..

First, unplug yourself. (Then maybe get a bandage)

Push your nose, your ear and your big toe at the same time. That should do it.

Remindful of the kidhood rejoinder when being singled out for a put-down: “You’re pointing one at me and three back at yourself.”

He could always take it back to Kohls and get a refund from Amazon.

Operator error.

Put it down and pick it up again? That might just work…

more like booty, as in swift kick in it to turn him around

I love it when you call your service provider and the recording says, “You can solve your internet problems by logging into our website.”

At one time I did field service. I worked on a project that supported the U. S. Army and I made tent calls. I got to one place where the issue was that the terminal was not working. When I asked where I could plug it in, the response was “oops.” I wrote that one off as operator error.

Another time I got a call to fix the light pen. I took a paper towel and wiped about a 1/8 inch of dust off the screen and told them, ‘If you can’t see the screen, the odds are the light pen can’t either."

I was the database guru, I’m not a hardware expert. However, I did travel with two memory boards and a motherboard in my backpack.

Did you try reading the safety and user’s manual?

This particular trial weeds out those who are not technologically proficient. It’s called the Darwin Theory.

I once worked with a bug system that doubled as our customer service incident tracker. When a user submitted an incident that turned out to be their mistake, the status on it was changed to “UBD – User Brain Damage”. I don’t know if anyone ever mentioned that status to our customers.

A primordial CEBKAC error

That’s how Don the Con would hold a bow

Sounds like a cool place to work. Most of the engineers I know are brilliant, grounded and totally interested in doing things that have not happened --yet. Gives me hope.

User Error, replace user and try again.

That’s gonna leave a mark…

Looks more like the suicide prevention hotline

My coder/tech support friends call that a “RTFM problem”.

“Archery Support, how may I be helping you this darkness!?”

These people would be in less danger standing near the target.

First you have to learn about String theory.

Ok. I know it’s a comic but how is that even possible???

Have you tried taking the string off, then putting it back on again?

At least once during the Obama administration, one of his advisors recommended that the Law of Gravity be repealed in order to facilitate some scheme they were contemplating.

If the arrow is in the wrong place, try moving the cursor. (“#$@%*ing arrows!”)

Green Arrow is filing a libel suit as we speak

Looks like a cassic case of “operator error” to me!

Eventually this species developed the art of proficiency simulation: Shoot an arrow at the barn, then draw the bullseye around it.

Try turning it off and on

ID Ten T error

First learn how the system works; that seems to be the problem …

Rebooting? No, no, no. You want to turn it off completely, count to ten, and then turn it back on again.

RTFM

Oooooopsie!!

Could be a useful feature, as it was for Matt Helm in the Dean Martin movie The Silencers

https://youtu.Be/pQHX-SjgQvQ

Barney Fife’s ancestor.