Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for March 08, 2024

Real men don’t mind pain. They are willing to wear scratchy underwear that comes with a built-in wedgie.

Duluth?

I used to like to get the rotisserie chicken from a major grocery chain after it was the end of selling, around 8pm. It was marked down to half, later 30%. Then they stopped. I found they took it to the back, chopped it into sections (value added they call it), put it into a tray and marked it up.

About 40 years ago now, at a winery I managed we had one badly flawed, although in no way toxic, wine that we couldn’t hardly give away at $1.50/bottle. Then one day I realized something. The next the wine was promoted as being uniquely flavorful and priced at $10.00/bottle, twice the price of any other wine. It sold out promptly, and when gone people were begged us for more.

If that works, it says more about the psychology of the market than the marketing.

That would probably work.

This is why we have Sprouts.

You need a third category. Whatever doesn’t sell as “for real men”, paint it camouflage, sew on a few karabiners, and sell as “tactical underwear”.

What’s more important? Being a ‘real’ man or being a good man?

Left won’t buy it, spray paint it gold, stick it next to some ammo and a pic of 45

Hawk it to the Right at a lot more than double.

They could also take the underwear that doesn’t sell in the women’s department and add it to the “Real Men” bin.

That last would be for “real men” who wear their undies on the outside.

Then there’s the bin marked “Depends for Sock Puppet Joe Biden”.

John Amann told NBC News he bought $2,200 worth of Trump Bucks and other items over the past year only to discover they were worthless when he tried to cash them in at his local bank. -NBC News May 27, 2023

All they have to do is paint them red and the rubes will buy it. What comes first with MAGA-Ts – the stupidity or the gullibility? Is it like a chicken and egg question?

let’s face it…the soup of the day in most eateries contains the veggies and meats that did not sell on the dinner menu the night before.

Sometimes they take the same product and market it to women for a higher price.

I am going to my local Goodwill and picking up a bunch of dresses. Then I am going to open up a small store and call it a boutique. Then I will put the following adjectives in front of the dresses: designer, petitie, tall and maternity. That should triple the price of the dresses.

I once did a essay on men’s and women’s clothing. The only pieces of apparel that are unique for each gender are bras and athletic supporters.

I can do a whole book on bras.

When it comes to athletic supporters there are two or three brands, maybe one or two colors and they are all basically the same design and made of the same material: cotton. Unlike bras which come in multiple sizes, athletic supporters come in a few sizes: small, medium, large and I am trying to impress the woman at the checkout.

Just like politics!

I’m waiting for mens underwear styles to change again. Growing up you could only find tighty whities. Then it seemed like all I could find was mens bikini briefs so I got used to those. A few years back all I could find was boxer briefs. Wonder if I will have to get used to something else before I die. Yes, boxers have always been an option that has never changed. However… loose boxers don’t support and I got tired of having to make sure everything was out of the way before I sat down and ended up sitting on myself. Or having a reaction in public and having it be noticeable. So… boxers were a very short lived experiment that my wife had me try early on in our marriage but then threw them out after a few month and introduced me to the bikini briefs instead. Really appreciated getting back to having support again.

The mantra of advertising: sell the sizzle, not the steak

The purpose of advertising: to have you get up from a full meal feeling hungry. Everything you have is not enough.

In the 60’s, I was an ad exec for a mid major newspaper. That was the way we designed every ad, every sales pitch – to sell not only the accounts but their potential customers.

My accounts were small companies, ‘mom and pop’ you’d call them. These were the targets of the huge everything stores, the major groceries, the big box stores. Look around and see how many of those ‘little guys’ there are now, even in small towns. Some call it ‘progress.’ Not sure that’s how I would characterize their loss or that now is better.

We had a department store that would strip the sales tickets off the garments, then take a hefty percent off the suggested retail price. With the high markup of clothing, they probably made a fortune with each sale.

marketing is everything.

Real men go commando

“This way to the egress!”

In the early 70s I worked for a now long-forgotten department store. Years later I found out a work acquaintance worked for the same company.

This was his experience: Leftover candy from Easter or Hallowe’en? No problem. Put it in the stockroom for next year.

They only do it if it works.

There is a great video on youtube – Dive. That deals with dumpster diving for food that was thrown out but retrieved by people who were getting the food before it spoiled but was deemed unsellable due to look, expiration date or damaged (12 egg carton with 1 egg broke). It took a while but it started a movement which eventually led to Albertsons, Vons etc to donate the food to food banks and shelters instead of landfills. Worth a serious look. won a bunch of rewards for its content.

Why would I want giant printed logos on my underwear? The last thing I want is for guys to be pointing and laughing in the locker room. :)

Real men get tough tattoos and real women get cute ones.

Antique shops know. If it won’t sell, move it to the front door and raise the price.

Just don’t put it on sale with a sign saying ‘our underwear is half off.’

What about those that can no longer call themselves Real Men? Depends.

Influencers 101.

*See:Book, “The Hidden Persuaders”1957

So true! Stores around where I live have added products with names like “Thick-ass Hunk of Soap” and “Tactical Deodorant”, sold in darkish boxes with square fonts.

KFC uses left over strips to make their bowl . Nothing ever changes. Anyone else old enough to remember paper price tags on grocery items. Used to find 3-4 on top of each other with each one being slightly higher. So much easier to just change the price in the computer. Gas station gets a new batch and immediately raises the price. Gas already on hand didn’t cost them more. All the time with everything.

“And the stuff that still doesn’t sell we move to the far right and label it Underwear for Alpha Males. And use some gold spray paint on it.”

Can’t post pics in the comments, so I’ll just have to describe one I took at least 20 years ago. Big red sign in Target with a big high-heeled shoe on it with the caption “Menswear”.

Yeah … so what else is new?

Hey!…that’s what Donald Trump did!

So true. Same thing for “Organic” foods.