Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 12, 2024

  1. Ding a ling
    BasilBruce  4 months ago

    Wackadoo.

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    salakfarm Premium Member 4 months ago

    Not to mention Klaatu barada nikto.

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    carlsonbob  4 months ago

    Just call everyone John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. His name is your name too. The techie moles won’t know what’s going on. (:Makes as much sense as Rat).

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    tudza Premium Member 4 months ago

    Those are just Star Wars character names.

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    Robin Harwood  4 months ago

    Good, healthy, paranoia is an essential survival tactic. They are out to get you, even if you don’t believe it.

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    PaulAbbott2  4 months ago

    Easy for you to say

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    A Common 'tator  4 months ago

    Why do you think Cockney came into existence?

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    noahproblem  4 months ago

    Where’s the Comics Censor? I’m pretty sure you can’t say “Farfoo” in a comic strip…

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    lavender headgear  4 months ago

    I put a piece of masking tape over the camera when I’m not using it. Not much I can do about the microphone.

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    californiamonty  4 months ago

    Subite mi demandas min, ĉu Doktoro Zamenhof estis paranoja krom geniulo.

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    jonnytest  4 months ago

    You can’t just say “lembot” whenever you want! That’s just nasty!

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    Gent  4 months ago

    Rat is so verminacular.

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    minty_Joe  4 months ago

    Just learn how to back-mask all your words. That’s how they snuck hidden messages into famous songs; lots of backwards messages.

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    willispate  4 months ago

    sorry, my translator’s on the fritz.

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    iggyman  4 months ago

    Alktay Otay Igpay!

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    The Old Wolf  4 months ago

    This is probably a good idea to use over at Facebook. These days, anything you say in normal language gets censored or “fact-checked,” no matter how valid it may be.

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    Doug K  4 months ago

    Em-klay embot-lay obo-bay arfoo-fay? … … O-may o-nay!

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    Kaputnik  4 months ago

    I don’t know, seems a bit farfootched to me.

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    markkahler52  4 months ago

    Mekka lekka hi, meeka hiney ho !

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    Egrayjames  4 months ago

    “Ganga Ganga Gang Galoonga!”

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    win.45mag  4 months ago

    Wasn’t Bobo a clown…….can’t quite place him, but the name rings a bell

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    Slowly, he turned...  4 months ago

    oo ee. oo ah ah, bing bang walla walla, bing bang

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    jel354  4 months ago

    I hope Rat provides an answer key for his key acquaintances.

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    akachman Premium Member 4 months ago

    Preach it, Rat!

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    RobinHood  4 months ago

    “I always feel like, somebody’s watching me.”

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    Procat Premium Member 4 months ago

    In the last panel it sounds like rat is running for president again, when asked about his policies he will enact if elected.

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    Skippy the Magnificent  4 months ago

    You’re not paranoid if they really are after you.

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    Ellis97  4 months ago

    Whatever it translates to, it’s probably something insulting.

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    Count Olaf Premium Member 4 months ago

    Rat just said “Let’s Go, Brandon”

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    2Goldfish  4 months ago

    Na-noo, na-noo!

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    chris_o42  4 months ago

    Rat, maj, jIyaj. majQa!

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    Huckleberry Hiroshima  4 months ago

    Nyiff-nyiff narrafenblaphul. Schmock!

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    rickseg  4 months ago

    Mairseedotes and doeseedotes and little lambseedivy.

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    wongo  4 months ago

    Translation: “Your mother sleeps with rabid wolverines”.

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    aerotica69  4 months ago

    Just don’t try speaking Klingon – everyone in “Big Tech” already knows that language.

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    mindjob  4 months ago

    Once they get a hold of that Universal Translator, the gig will be up

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    Queen of America  4 months ago

    The only thing my phone camera will catch is me playing with the foster kittens or the inside of my purse.

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    Ozzman25  4 months ago

    Yah a dab will do

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    DanMoran1  4 months ago

    May I mambo dog face to the banana patch? -credit Steve Martin

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    esg1981  4 months ago

    Google Translate detects “klem lembot bobo farfoo” as Afar language, which in English is “soft clamp stupid farfoo”.

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    ladykat  4 months ago

    What Rat said.

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    Dapperdan61  Premium Member 4 months ago

    Actually it’s not paranoid. Last night I was eating dinner with my wife suddenly my Apple Watch started to say something like I can help you with at. This isn’t the first time it’s done that. Another time I was talking about brother and the Apple Watch asked if I’d like to send him our conversation. And don’t get me going on the other eavesdropper Alexa

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    Radish the wordsmith  4 months ago

    Sigur Rós Rat

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    txmystic  4 months ago

    Chaka! Chaka Chaka Chaka!

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    Goat from PBS  4 months ago

    I’ll take that as a no and a sharp insult.

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    txmystic  4 months ago

    So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I’m a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald… striking.

    So, I’m on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one – big hitter, the Lama – long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga… gunga, gunga-lagunga.

    So we finish eighteen and he’s gonna stiff me. And I say, “Hey! Lama! Hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.” And he says, “Oh, uh, there won’t be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.”

    So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.

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    DaBump Premium Member 4 months ago

    I was going to say something about Klingon or Esperanto, but I see I’m late to the party.

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    gorbag  4 months ago

    I believe “Newspeak” from Orwell’s 1984 covers the horror that redefining language by the government (or political parties for that matter) can cause.

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    walstib Premium Member 4 months ago

    As a youth, “A Clockwork Orange” was my favorite movie (after “Duck Soup”), but the alternate language annoyed me. And the book was even worse.

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    Keno21  4 months ago

    Oo ee, oo ah ah. Ting tang, walla walla bing bang!

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    [Anonymous Account]  4 months ago

    I do that too except it’s because I need an invented language for my Fantasy epic. Cea nor calren Rael. (All the lesser mortals fear me)

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    Bilan  4 months ago

    It won’t work. The NSA has a language translation department.

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    The Brooklyn Accent Premium Member 4 months ago

    Goo goo g’joob!

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    kaffekup   4 months ago

    The most suspicious people nowadays are the ones that speak foreign languages, Rat.

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  55. Nowyoulisten
    zeexenon  4 months ago

    Igpay atinlay oryay atray atinlay?

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  56. Omegasupreme
    omegasupreme  4 months ago

    well I can still talk to rat using the Universal greeting Bah-weep-Graaaaagnah wheep ni ni bong.

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  57. Yes napoleon dynamite
    toddqwilliams  4 months ago

    Wooh! Watch the language!!

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    Buoy  4 months ago

    I think Rat said, Go eff yourself sheep.

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    CatDefender  4 months ago

    Simlish!

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    FRITH RA  4 months ago

    What? Nothing about eels and hovercrafts?

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    willie_mctell  4 months ago

    When I worked in a pizza parlor I wished the employees had a secret language.

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  4 months ago

    Oh,Maha?AHA!!

    Rasganyabettafafoochie…dat frogface,,,,you gotta something,kiddo?

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    Roscoe  4 months ago

    Covfefe, covfefe, covfefe.

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    dimndno  4 months ago

    I’m only paranoid cuz everyone’s spying on me.

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    Katje  4 months ago

    Kartoffel stammpot lemme eet.

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    JoeMartinFan Premium Member 4 months ago

    Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop!

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    JoeMartinFan Premium Member 4 months ago

    Rat already said too much in panels 2 and 3.

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    Chris Sherlock  4 months ago

    I hate to tell you, Rat, but that’s not your own language. According to Google Translate, it’s the Afar language, used in parts of Africa. What you said in the last panel means “Stupid Farfoo Soft Clam” in English.

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    aerilim  4 months ago

    I turn off my phone at 5PM everyday..

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    eddi-TBH  4 months ago

    They do have a listening mode when the assistant software is active. I’m sure that can be abused. Solution, no Alexa, no Siri and keep your phone in your backpack / purse.

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    thedogesl Premium Member 4 months ago

    “Spreak Engrish twoops!”

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    HA!  4 months ago

    Flea, flea fly flo, vista, cumola cumola cumola vista, no no no not la vista!

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    whelan_jj  4 months ago

    Since no-one can understand your invented language anyway, I have a simpler solution: Keep your mouth shut and never say anything.

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    Strawberry King  4 months ago

    This ratty is batty.

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    Swirls Before Pine  4 months ago

    Not when my phone’s battery is dead, which is often.

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    pantograph  4 months ago

    Navajo code talkers worked great in WW II.

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    Ceeg22 Premium Member 3 months ago

    Shaka, when the walls fell

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